“Yes, I am,” I a dit calmly. I felt sick to my stomach even as I a dit it.
“Why?” asked Grey as if it were not obvious.
“I l’amour him,” I said.
“I thought toi loved me,” she said, tears in her eyes. Although I saw tears, I also saw hate and fire.
“You were mistaken,” I said, it was cruel, but true. I loved Alexander plus than her.
“Why don’t toi l’amour me?” she asked.
“You raped me, and I married toi only because the baby,” I said. “Then I stayed with you, because I thought toi would get your dad to tell the psychiatric board I wasn’t ready for the job.”
“Wait…What baby?” Grey asked her brow furrowed.
“The baby…You got pregnant the night toi raped me. toi had a miscarriage, remember?” she had to remember, right? Maybe she had repressed it, but it wasn’t like her to repress things. That was plus my style.
“Oh my God,” Grey laughed, and shook her head. “You really fell for that?”
“Fell for what?”
“I lied to you. I was never pregnant. I told toi a lie, and I knew toi would marry me. toi would never let a child suffer,” a dit Grey. Something inside me broke. It was one thing to lie, but it was another thing to lie about a child.
“How dare you…You’re such a bitch, a selfish, hateful bitch,” I spat. I tried organizing words in my mind. It wasn’t working.
“I didn’t know any other way,” she a dit coolly.
“Why did toi want me anyway? Was it not obvious enough that I was gay? You’ve kept me in misery for years,” I said.
“I wanted you, because toi were sexy. We would be all the rage, and I wanted that. I knew toi were gay, but I thought I could turn you…I was wrong,” she a dit her head down.
“Yes, toi were wrong; because of toi I have been stressed. All I’ve wanted was Alexander, but no, I couldn’t have him. I was with you, and toi kept me on such a tight leash Grey,” I said, furious. “I was ready to commit suicide, and it was all your fault.”
“Damien, I’m sorry,” Grey said, but it was not sincere.
“No toi aren’t,” I walked up the stairs she trailed behind me.
“Damn it Damien, you’re such a bastard! How do toi know what I feel? Why do toi do blame me? It’s your own fault! I never a dit that toi couldn’t leave me,” she said.
“You implied it. The way toi would talk about me, how toi treated me. I am your toy! That’s it, and if I would’ve left, my career would be over,” I said. Grey had a look on her face, she knew I was right.
“Leave, now,” she a dit sternly.
“I will,” I took my suitcase out of the closet and walked out of the house. I was furious I had to calm down. I would never go back…Never…
“Why?” asked Grey as if it were not obvious.
“I l’amour him,” I said.
“I thought toi loved me,” she said, tears in her eyes. Although I saw tears, I also saw hate and fire.
“You were mistaken,” I said, it was cruel, but true. I loved Alexander plus than her.
“Why don’t toi l’amour me?” she asked.
“You raped me, and I married toi only because the baby,” I said. “Then I stayed with you, because I thought toi would get your dad to tell the psychiatric board I wasn’t ready for the job.”
“Wait…What baby?” Grey asked her brow furrowed.
“The baby…You got pregnant the night toi raped me. toi had a miscarriage, remember?” she had to remember, right? Maybe she had repressed it, but it wasn’t like her to repress things. That was plus my style.
“Oh my God,” Grey laughed, and shook her head. “You really fell for that?”
“Fell for what?”
“I lied to you. I was never pregnant. I told toi a lie, and I knew toi would marry me. toi would never let a child suffer,” a dit Grey. Something inside me broke. It was one thing to lie, but it was another thing to lie about a child.
“How dare you…You’re such a bitch, a selfish, hateful bitch,” I spat. I tried organizing words in my mind. It wasn’t working.
“I didn’t know any other way,” she a dit coolly.
“Why did toi want me anyway? Was it not obvious enough that I was gay? You’ve kept me in misery for years,” I said.
“I wanted you, because toi were sexy. We would be all the rage, and I wanted that. I knew toi were gay, but I thought I could turn you…I was wrong,” she a dit her head down.
“Yes, toi were wrong; because of toi I have been stressed. All I’ve wanted was Alexander, but no, I couldn’t have him. I was with you, and toi kept me on such a tight leash Grey,” I said, furious. “I was ready to commit suicide, and it was all your fault.”
“Damien, I’m sorry,” Grey said, but it was not sincere.
“No toi aren’t,” I walked up the stairs she trailed behind me.
“Damn it Damien, you’re such a bastard! How do toi know what I feel? Why do toi do blame me? It’s your own fault! I never a dit that toi couldn’t leave me,” she said.
“You implied it. The way toi would talk about me, how toi treated me. I am your toy! That’s it, and if I would’ve left, my career would be over,” I said. Grey had a look on her face, she knew I was right.
“Leave, now,” she a dit sternly.
“I will,” I took my suitcase out of the closet and walked out of the house. I was furious I had to calm down. I would never go back…Never…
I make mistakes
I mess up
but it was nevr enough
I no longer cry for you
no plus pain
that means I will no longer stand it
toi took my cœur, coeur and ran it strait into the planet
now I'm taking control of this relationship
command it
that means I no longer die for
no longer cry for toi
no plus pain
but toi always win
as th blood trickles down my arm
I wisper toi name into the dark
Cierra
the pain I went through for you
no longer
is anyone out there
feels like I'm talking o myslelf
feels like I'm going insane
feels crazy
guess I keep talking to myself
why in the world do I feel so alone
nobody but me
I'm on my own
is there anyone out there
that feels just what I feel
guess it's just me.
------------------------------------------------
just to let toi know.I'm no sewisidle ou crazy.just a kid who's been through alot and has grown up faster
I mess up
but it was nevr enough
I no longer cry for you
no plus pain
that means I will no longer stand it
toi took my cœur, coeur and ran it strait into the planet
now I'm taking control of this relationship
command it
that means I no longer die for
no longer cry for toi
no plus pain
but toi always win
as th blood trickles down my arm
I wisper toi name into the dark
Cierra
the pain I went through for you
no longer
is anyone out there
feels like I'm talking o myslelf
feels like I'm going insane
feels crazy
guess I keep talking to myself
why in the world do I feel so alone
nobody but me
I'm on my own
is there anyone out there
that feels just what I feel
guess it's just me.
------------------------------------------------
just to let toi know.I'm no sewisidle ou crazy.just a kid who's been through alot and has grown up faster
Pride is a belief in myself (or someone else) that within me is something no one else has just like me. Pride can be a wonderful thing. My coaches are proud of me when I execute a déplacer perfectly. I am proud of my efforts when I get the right answer to a test question. However, pride can have a negative connotation. If I am prideful of my chant talent ou of my sports accomplishments, then I am not feeling the right kind of pride. Yes, I can be pleased with my abilities; but when I let it go to my head, then I am full of pride, just like Odysseus often was. par believing that I am the only person with that talent, I inflate my ego. I believe myself to be “the best of the best,” and this can damage my relationships with others. They would not want my company if the only things I spoke of were my own accomplishments.
Meghan ran to the bus stop, where she saw Pompika. Thankfully Pompika looked at her politely and a dit “You know I saw Reg but ya know, how she’s jus’ across the street, she seems a lil’ mad!” Meghan thought for a seconde and thought ‘why lose Pompika?’ and said, “Geez I don’t know?” Now she wished she had told the truth, instead of lying. “Oh I wish ya did.” Pompika said. “Tsk-Tsk, bad grammar Pompi” a dit Meghan. “Sorry, fine I wish toi did. There ya… toi go” “Hhhmmm, nice save.” Meghan said. “Hey look, Reg’s a comin’” a dit Pompika. “Great that’s good… wait REG!!!” a dit Meghan. “What?” a dit Pompika. "nothing."
i am looking for the star, our star, but this time i am alone, toi aren't standing on the port suivant to me..
i feel i am Lost now, i can't find this star. toi remeber what did i descoverd that night? i found only one étoile, star in the whole Portsaid's sky..
toi didn't belive that one étoile, star is exist.. toi said: which star? the sky is felling of the stars!
i thought toi was kidding, i was very sure that there's one star.. yeah, sure as the blind is sure that there's nothing around him!
now i see what toi were talking about, i loved you, so i couldn't see anyone else but you..
toi was my heart's only love..
it was Portsaid's only star..
but toi .. toi didn't point to the same star, toi saw all the stars but mine..
now i am alone, seeing many stars, can't find my star, am i blind? ou ..was i blind?
twinkle, twinkle, my littel star..
Portsaid's only star, which one is you?
_________________________________________________
*Portsaid is an Egyptian port.
i feel i am Lost now, i can't find this star. toi remeber what did i descoverd that night? i found only one étoile, star in the whole Portsaid's sky..
toi didn't belive that one étoile, star is exist.. toi said: which star? the sky is felling of the stars!
i thought toi was kidding, i was very sure that there's one star.. yeah, sure as the blind is sure that there's nothing around him!
now i see what toi were talking about, i loved you, so i couldn't see anyone else but you..
toi was my heart's only love..
it was Portsaid's only star..
but toi .. toi didn't point to the same star, toi saw all the stars but mine..
now i am alone, seeing many stars, can't find my star, am i blind? ou ..was i blind?
twinkle, twinkle, my littel star..
Portsaid's only star, which one is you?
_________________________________________________
*Portsaid is an Egyptian port.
toi hurt me,
Both externally,
And internally,
toi twist a pin into my heart,
And gather my flowing blood onto a cart.
toi think toi can hurt me,
Just because toi gave me money,
toi think toi can make my life like hell,
Just because I am the one who made toi fell.
I wish toi have never donné birth to me,
I wish I can expose what toi are for all to see.
I hate you,
And I hate toi to the heart's core,
I want toi to hear my vengeful call.
I respect toi because I must,
Yet toi blame me for not giving toi my trust.
How can I love, ou trust, a person like you?
Who makes me feel I'm feebler than cotton wool?
I am forever imprisoned to toi par blood,
For as long as I live,
The relation between us cannot be cut,
But soon I will take my leave,
Hoping that forever toi will grieve
Both externally,
And internally,
toi twist a pin into my heart,
And gather my flowing blood onto a cart.
toi think toi can hurt me,
Just because toi gave me money,
toi think toi can make my life like hell,
Just because I am the one who made toi fell.
I wish toi have never donné birth to me,
I wish I can expose what toi are for all to see.
I hate you,
And I hate toi to the heart's core,
I want toi to hear my vengeful call.
I respect toi because I must,
Yet toi blame me for not giving toi my trust.
How can I love, ou trust, a person like you?
Who makes me feel I'm feebler than cotton wool?
I am forever imprisoned to toi par blood,
For as long as I live,
The relation between us cannot be cut,
But soon I will take my leave,
Hoping that forever toi will grieve