My friend posté these on her bebo page a while il y a so I thought I'd share them with toi :D
1) Bring a pillow. Fall asleep until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say ``oh geez, better get cracking'' and do some gibberish work.
2) Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming ``Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!''
3) If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the surface integral symbol.
4) Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.
5) Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, débats your réponses with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, ``I'm SOOO sure toi can hear me thinking.'' Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
6) Bring cheerleaders.
7) Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, ``I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?''
8) On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
9) Bring your pet poisson in his poisson bowl and say it's your lucky charm.
10) Bring your Nintendo DS and turn the volume up full blast.
11) Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out ``Merry Christmas.'' If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say toi Lost the first one. Repeat the process every fifteen minutes.
12) Do the exam with crayons, paint, ou fluorescent markers.
13) Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
14) Do the entire exam in another language. If toi don't know one, make one up. For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
15) Bring things to throw at the instructor when he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest you.
16) Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB, BABE, etc.)
17) Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and réponses completely blacked out.
18) Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out ``Fuck this!'' and walk out triumphantly.
19) Arrange a protest before the exam starts (e.g. Threaten the instructor that whether ou not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one heure to get drunk.)
20) montrer up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means that at some point during the exam, toi should start crying for mommy.)
21) Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him in a very derogatory tone, ``The light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!''
22) commentaire on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
23) Bring a water pistol with you. 'Nuff said.
24) Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.
25) Bring a friend to give toi a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because toi have bad circulation.
26) Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious. . . like history notes for a calculus exam. . . otherwise your're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the commentaire ``Please use the attached notes for references as toi see fit.''
27) After toi get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him.
28) One word: Wrestlemania.
29) Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right suivant to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.
30) Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If toi are asked to stop, say ``it helps me think.'' Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase ``Told toi so.''
1) Bring a pillow. Fall asleep until the last 15 minutes. Wake up, say ``oh geez, better get cracking'' and do some gibberish work.
2) Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming ``Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!''
3) If it is a math/science exam, answer in essay form. If it is long answer/essay form, answer with numbers and symbols. Be creative. Use the surface integral symbol.
4) Make paper airplanes out of the exam. Aim them at the instructor's left nostril.
5) Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, débats your réponses with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, ``I'm SOOO sure toi can hear me thinking.'' Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.
6) Bring cheerleaders.
7) Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About five minutes into it, loudly say to the instructor, ``I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?''
8) On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.
9) Bring your pet poisson in his poisson bowl and say it's your lucky charm.
10) Bring your Nintendo DS and turn the volume up full blast.
11) Fifteen minutes into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out ``Merry Christmas.'' If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say toi Lost the first one. Repeat the process every fifteen minutes.
12) Do the exam with crayons, paint, ou fluorescent markers.
13) Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.
14) Do the entire exam in another language. If toi don't know one, make one up. For math/science exams, try using Roman numerals.
15) Bring things to throw at the instructor when he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest you.
16) Do the entire exam as if it was multiple choice and true/false. If it is a multiple choice exam, spell out interesting things (DCCAB, BABE, etc.)
17) Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and réponses completely blacked out.
18) Get the exam. Twenty minutes into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out ``Fuck this!'' and walk out triumphantly.
19) Arrange a protest before the exam starts (e.g. Threaten the instructor that whether ou not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one heure to get drunk.)
20) montrer up completely drunk. (Completely drunk means that at some point during the exam, toi should start crying for mommy.)
21) Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him in a very derogatory tone, ``The light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!''
22) commentaire on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.
23) Bring a water pistol with you. 'Nuff said.
24) Start a brawl in the middle of the exam.
25) Bring a friend to give toi a back massage the entire way through the exam. Insist this person is needed, because toi have bad circulation.
26) Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious. . . like history notes for a calculus exam. . . otherwise your're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the commentaire ``Please use the attached notes for references as toi see fit.''
27) After toi get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him.
28) One word: Wrestlemania.
29) Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right suivant to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.
30) Bring a musical instrument with you, play various tunes. If toi are asked to stop, say ``it helps me think.'' Bring a copy of the Student Handbook with you, challenging the instructor to find the section on musical instruments during finals. Don't forget to use the phrase ``Told toi so.''
"Do toi hear that?"Alicia asked."What?"Henry and Sarah asked."That,that,that sound.It's like."Alicia banged the floor."No.I don't hear anything."Said Sarah."Come here."Alicia said.
They got out.
Alicia beckoned them.
"There!It's getting louder!"
The banging continued.
Alicia found herself in the woods.
She stopped.
Henry and Sarah caught up to her.
Alicia covered her mouth.
"What.Is.I-i-it?"Alicia asked.
Down the steep hill.Was a door the door was buried in the ground.under leaves.
The three Friends stepped down.The noise grew louder.Henry and Sarah could hear it now.
Alicia was down first.She saw a keyhole.Alicia looked for the key.
"ALICIA!"Sarah said.
Alicia looked down,stopped her foot from going down,And backed up.A blood puddle.
"Oh my go-"
"The key!It's in the blood!"Henry said.
"Ew!I'm not picking it up!"Alicia said.
Sarah looked around and pushed Henry forward.
Henry picked up the key,And put it in the keyhole...
They got out.
Alicia beckoned them.
"There!It's getting louder!"
The banging continued.
Alicia found herself in the woods.
She stopped.
Henry and Sarah caught up to her.
Alicia covered her mouth.
"What.Is.I-i-it?"Alicia asked.
Down the steep hill.Was a door the door was buried in the ground.under leaves.
The three Friends stepped down.The noise grew louder.Henry and Sarah could hear it now.
Alicia was down first.She saw a keyhole.Alicia looked for the key.
"ALICIA!"Sarah said.
Alicia looked down,stopped her foot from going down,And backed up.A blood puddle.
"Oh my go-"
"The key!It's in the blood!"Henry said.
"Ew!I'm not picking it up!"Alicia said.
Sarah looked around and pushed Henry forward.
Henry picked up the key,And put it in the keyhole...
2. Troll. If toi troll, toi will be banned in 10 secondes flat and nobody will feel sorry for toi when toi whine about your old account being banned.
3. Speak 1337. if u t4lk li3k d3s, nobody will take toi seriously.
4. Talk trash about Hetalia. I don't like Hetalia, but I don't talk trash about it. The fangirls will rape toi with hate if toi say rude things.
5. Be anything like dudelol17.
Taylor:*Wakes up*LIZZIE!*panting*
Lizzie:Taylor!Taylor,Calm down.
Taylor's P.O.V:
I looked around and saw Charm,Amber,Amy,and Lizzie.
Taylor:What?Wait what happened??
Amy:You were outside,Had scratches on your arm,so we drove toi to the hospital.
I looked at my arm,A scratch ran down my arm,My eyes got huge.
Lizzie:It's okay!You're okay!
Then Amber turned on the TV.
Lady on news:Today Johnathan Jonesmen was arrested for murdering his wife.And today,his 3 daughters are in a orphanage.And his oldest daughter,Taylor is in the hospital.
I started to get dizzy.I almost dozed off when.
Lizzie:Taylor,Here *hand a bracelet*
The Bracelet had five rhinestones, and 5 charms.One had a little girl dancing,The seconde one was a key,The third one had a cœur, coeur lock,The fourth one had a lock,The fifth one had Locket,I opened it up.I saw a photo of Me and Lizzie.
Lizzie:Taylor!Taylor,Calm down.
Taylor's P.O.V:
I looked around and saw Charm,Amber,Amy,and Lizzie.
Taylor:What?Wait what happened??
Amy:You were outside,Had scratches on your arm,so we drove toi to the hospital.
I looked at my arm,A scratch ran down my arm,My eyes got huge.
Lizzie:It's okay!You're okay!
Then Amber turned on the TV.
Lady on news:Today Johnathan Jonesmen was arrested for murdering his wife.And today,his 3 daughters are in a orphanage.And his oldest daughter,Taylor is in the hospital.
I started to get dizzy.I almost dozed off when.
Lizzie:Taylor,Here *hand a bracelet*
The Bracelet had five rhinestones, and 5 charms.One had a little girl dancing,The seconde one was a key,The third one had a cœur, coeur lock,The fourth one had a lock,The fifth one had Locket,I opened it up.I saw a photo of Me and Lizzie.
There once lived a 10 an old girl named,Scarlett.
Her family lived in a Big,HUGE,Mansion.
S:Mom!!!PLEASE!!!!!!!
M:If I say Fine,will toi stop?
S:YES!!!
M:Yes.
S:(Hugs mom)THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!WOO HO!!
Scarlett ran up to call her 3 friends,Nancy,Penny,and Chloe.
S:(Calls)SHE a dit YES!!!
Then her brother,Ethan,Came in,holding a bag of chips.
E:SHUT UP,SCARLETT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
S:SHHHHUUUUTT UUUUPPP!!!
Then he stomped out.
M:Scarlett!I just remembered!I have to work tomorrow!
S:So?We're responsible,Mom!Besides,(mumbles)Ethan...is....(gulp,pretends to barf)Responsible.
M:Um...I don't know
S:Don't make me say it...AGAIN!
M:Fine!!But toi have to help me with the groceries!
S:(Makes face)Fine!Last deal!
M:Come on!
--------------------------------------------------
TO BE CONTINUED!
Her family lived in a Big,HUGE,Mansion.
S:Mom!!!PLEASE!!!!!!!
M:If I say Fine,will toi stop?
S:YES!!!
M:Yes.
S:(Hugs mom)THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!WOO HO!!
Scarlett ran up to call her 3 friends,Nancy,Penny,and Chloe.
S:(Calls)SHE a dit YES!!!
Then her brother,Ethan,Came in,holding a bag of chips.
E:SHUT UP,SCARLETT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
S:SHHHHUUUUTT UUUUPPP!!!
Then he stomped out.
M:Scarlett!I just remembered!I have to work tomorrow!
S:So?We're responsible,Mom!Besides,(mumbles)Ethan...is....(gulp,pretends to barf)Responsible.
M:Um...I don't know
S:Don't make me say it...AGAIN!
M:Fine!!But toi have to help me with the groceries!
S:(Makes face)Fine!Last deal!
M:Come on!
--------------------------------------------------
TO BE CONTINUED!
Teacher:Okay Suzi go to the map and find North America.
Suzi:Right here!
Teacher:Good job!Now Bobby,who discovered America?
Bobby:Suzi Did!
god I cracked up today!
------------------------------------------------
Speaking of today!My class gotta go to our 'BOOK BUDDIES' Class room and help make gingerbread houses!My book buddy's name was Addy,(mine is Abby!)Anyways!It was like...SPRINKLE CITY!!If toi were an ant,You would drown in sprinkles!!!!!!!!!GOD
My friend ,Sam,Was suivant to me...and she had like 50 spaz attacks!She was super hyped up!!!!Wow!They really shouldn't Put Candy in front of her!And I just can't stand the sprinkles!!!!God!I almost devoured the icing!There was like M&Ms,Gummy Drops,
Candy Canes,Nerds(one girl was like' Oh my god i l’amour these!),a lot plus too!Plus my friend Sam made a story called 'The Black Dragons' Kinda like The girl with the dragon tattoo!Listening to Taylor Swift's"Permanent marker"!Love it!
BYE GUTS AND GURLS!
Suzi:Right here!
Teacher:Good job!Now Bobby,who discovered America?
Bobby:Suzi Did!
god I cracked up today!
------------------------------------------------
Speaking of today!My class gotta go to our 'BOOK BUDDIES' Class room and help make gingerbread houses!My book buddy's name was Addy,(mine is Abby!)Anyways!It was like...SPRINKLE CITY!!If toi were an ant,You would drown in sprinkles!!!!!!!!!GOD
My friend ,Sam,Was suivant to me...and she had like 50 spaz attacks!She was super hyped up!!!!Wow!They really shouldn't Put Candy in front of her!And I just can't stand the sprinkles!!!!God!I almost devoured the icing!There was like M&Ms,Gummy Drops,
Candy Canes,Nerds(one girl was like' Oh my god i l’amour these!),a lot plus too!Plus my friend Sam made a story called 'The Black Dragons' Kinda like The girl with the dragon tattoo!Listening to Taylor Swift's"Permanent marker"!Love it!
BYE GUTS AND GURLS!
Ashley:Okay,lets see there's,a four an old Amber,
A 12 an old Kennedy,A 5 an old Harper,And then there's 9 an old Zack.Some job*Hears screaming*
Amber:HARPER!GET OUT!!!NOW!!!
Harper:Fine!*Takes Dolls*Hope ya don't need your Dollies!*Runs*
Amber:HARPER STOP IT!!!!I WILL PERSONALLY KILL YOU!
Ashley:STOP IT!!*Stops Harper*Harper!Give Amber her poupées back.
Harper:FINE!!*Throws Dolls*I HATE EVERYTHING!!!
Ashley:Okay.Amber,Do toi want something to eat?
Amber:Yes!Can I have a waffle?
Ashley:Sure!*Goes In kitchen*Waffles...waffles,Oh!
here we go,Okay Egos!Put in grille-pain for half a minute.
*Ten minutes later*
Kennedy:Hey Ashley!Do toi know who you're working for?
Ashley:Uh Darrel And Amy?
Kennedy:Well yes but,They're also BILLIONAIRES!They picked toi as the Babysitter cause toi have 7 siblings and toi all ways babysat them.
Ashley:So your telling me that...I'M WORKING FOR BILLIONAIRES!!??
Kennedy:*Rolls eyes*Yes...Yes that is what I meant!
A 12 an old Kennedy,A 5 an old Harper,And then there's 9 an old Zack.Some job*Hears screaming*
Amber:HARPER!GET OUT!!!NOW!!!
Harper:Fine!*Takes Dolls*Hope ya don't need your Dollies!*Runs*
Amber:HARPER STOP IT!!!!I WILL PERSONALLY KILL YOU!
Ashley:STOP IT!!*Stops Harper*Harper!Give Amber her poupées back.
Harper:FINE!!*Throws Dolls*I HATE EVERYTHING!!!
Ashley:Okay.Amber,Do toi want something to eat?
Amber:Yes!Can I have a waffle?
Ashley:Sure!*Goes In kitchen*Waffles...waffles,Oh!
here we go,Okay Egos!Put in grille-pain for half a minute.
*Ten minutes later*
Kennedy:Hey Ashley!Do toi know who you're working for?
Ashley:Uh Darrel And Amy?
Kennedy:Well yes but,They're also BILLIONAIRES!They picked toi as the Babysitter cause toi have 7 siblings and toi all ways babysat them.
Ashley:So your telling me that...I'M WORKING FOR BILLIONAIRES!!??
Kennedy:*Rolls eyes*Yes...Yes that is what I meant!
