Critical Analysis of Twilight Club
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 Real vampires Don't Sparkle
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Nikola Tesla from Sanctuary (aka the best vampire EVER) does not appreciate being asked if he sparkles! :P
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sanctuary
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jonathon young
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posted by RobynPotter
{i did not write this myself, but i found it ridiculously funny and thought it needed to be posté here}

Book 1. Twilight:
Edward: Hey.
Bella: OMG, I'm so silly. And horny.
Edward: Yes. I'm dangerous. I sparkle.
Bella: OMG you're a vampire!
Edward: Yes. Let's go play baseball.
James: I like your girl, Edward. Gotta eat her.
Edward: Roar.
James: Omnomnom Bella.
Bella: OMG I'm screaming in agony! Yes, I will be a vampire!
Edward: I'm gonna kill you, James! I'm gonna suck Bella as well.
Jacob: Oh, hi there!
Book 2. New Moon:
Edward: Oops, gotta go.
Bella: OMG don't leave me! OMG I'm so depressed and dying in...
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 Credit: Very Demotivational
Credit: Very Demotivational
I felt a compelling need to write this article because recently I have found myself plus constantly thrust into situations and debates where I have to defend the Harry Potter fandom against the Twilight fandom, which I despise so much. My best friend and her family are actually major pro-Twilight fans. This past evening made me realize that there are so many reasons why Harry Potter is much plus awesome than Twilight, and its not just the obvious ones either. Thus, I give toi all the evidence toi will ever need to successfully pwn a Twilight fan trying to bring your fandom down.

Obvious Reasons...
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I'll never be an emo vampire, Setting tweenaged loins on fire.
I've got nothing in common with the vampires of today.
They gaze at girls and pout and brood and then just run away.
This Twilight hack thinks she can come along and change the vampire rules.
I guess sleeping in coffins and wearing capes, suddenly isn't cool.
Girls won't climb up trees with me ou canoodle in the grass.
And when I play vampire baseball, I always get picked last.
Oh come on! Seriously dudes. That's a human toi just picked over me.
I've seduced all kinds of women from all over the world.
But, now the only dates I get...
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i had nothing to do absolutely nothing to do. As i was so bored i began drawing through one of Dimitri's favori cowboy novels i had a feeling this would annoy him. suddenly i felt someone looming above me i turned around, it was Dimitri just as i thought he was going to be annoyed with me for sure.
"What are toi doing Roza?" he asked
I grinned. he picked up the novel that i was drawing in i hope he didn't see it.
"Ah one of favori books." he opened the book and saw my lovely work of art. He frowned at me.
"Busted." i laughed nervously
"Rose why are toi destroying my books?" he asked sternly...
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posted by AliceHaleCullen
Rightio, it's been a while since I wrote an article and my best friend recently told me something that shocked me beyond belief.

She was walking through our local town centre in a 'Team Jacob' t-shirt, and a aléatoire girl she didn't even know just walked up to her, punched her and called her numerous swear words just because her chemise didn't say 'Team Edward'.

This really opened my eyes to how violent Twilight series 'fans' can be. It's not acceptable to coup de poing someone in the face if they've done something, let alone because they have a different opinion on something.

Since then she's been to scared...
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posted by Dearheart
Bwahahaha! Welcome, little people! *cues scary pipe organ music* Yes, the C.A.T.’s out of the bag. It’s true. There are people in existence who do NOT worship the ground the Stephenie Meyer walks on. But before all toi Twi-hards get mad about it and rapporter us, let me tell toi what this spot is NOT. Twi-haters, this applies to toi as well, so listen up.

This is not an anti spot. (Read that sentence twice, please.)

We are not here to bash Stephenie Meyer ou her fans, nor are we here to hate Twilight for the sake of hating it. That’s just as stupid (if not plus so) as obsessing over Twilight...
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added by BruCaS_LoVE
Source: tumblr.com
added by marthatsal
added by Lilly98
video
twilight
protest
added by rachaelwsz
Source: ONTD @ LJ
added by KitKatLex
added by sparkyhedgehog
added by Mallory23
Source: lightspeedfuckingchampion.tumblr.com
added by rachaelwsz
Source: Jamie Ogalesco's FB mur
added by Mallory23
Source: http://www.forksforum.com/twilight
added by snoznoodle
Source: Me
added by cassie-1-2-3
Source: Entertainment Weekly
added by KateKicksAss
video
twilight
Edward Cullen
bad boy
fan video
song
We got Robert & Taylor here! lol! lol!
video
jimmy kimmel
Robert Pattinson
Taylor Lautner
funny
criticism