These are supposedly actual answering machine announcements.
1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to toi as soon as we're finished.
2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.
3. Hi. This is John: If toi are the phone company, I already sent the money. If toi are my parents, please send money. If toi are my financial aid institution, toi didn't lend me enough money. If toi are my friends, toi owe me money. If toi are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
4. Hi. Now toi say something.
5. Hi, I'm not accueil right now, but my answering machine is, so toi can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?
7. Hello! If toi leave a message, I'll call toi soon. If toi leave a "sexy" message, I'll call sooner!
8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
9. Hello, toi are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows ou a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
10. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your number and your reason for calling, and I'll think about returning your call.
11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message and then wait par your phone until I call toi back.
13. If toi are a burglar, then we're probably at accueil cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't accueil and it's sûr, sans danger to leave a message.
14. Please leave a message. However, toi have the right to remain silent. Everything toi say will be recorded and will be used par us.
15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
1. My wife and I can't come to the phone right now, but if you'll leave your name and number, we'll get back to toi as soon as we're finished.
2. A is for academics, B is for beer. One of those reasons is why we're not here. So, leave a message.
3. Hi. This is John: If toi are the phone company, I already sent the money. If toi are my parents, please send money. If toi are my financial aid institution, toi didn't lend me enough money. If toi are my friends, toi owe me money. If toi are a female, don't worry, I have plenty of money.
4. Hi. Now toi say something.
5. Hi, I'm not accueil right now, but my answering machine is, so toi can talk to it instead. Wait for the beep.
6. Hello. I am David's answering machine. What are you?
7. Hello! If toi leave a message, I'll call toi soon. If toi leave a "sexy" message, I'll call sooner!
8. Hi! John's answering machine is broken This is his refrigerator. Please speak very slowly, and I'll stick your message to myself with one of these magnets.
9. Hello, toi are talking to a machine. I am capable of receiving messages. My owners do not need siding, windows ou a hot tub, and their carpets are clean. They give to charity through their office and do not need their picture taken. If you're still with me, leave your name and number and they will get back to you.
10. This is not an answering machine - this is a telepathic thought recording device. After the tone, think about your name, your number and your reason for calling, and I'll think about returning your call.
11. Hi. I'm probably home, I'm just avoiding someone I don't like. Leave me a message, and if I don't call back, it's you.
12. Hi, this is George. I'm sorry I can't answer the phone right now. Leave a message and then wait par your phone until I call toi back.
13. If toi are a burglar, then we're probably at accueil cleaning our weapons right now and can't come to the phone. Otherwise, we probably aren't accueil and it's sûr, sans danger to leave a message.
14. Please leave a message. However, toi have the right to remain silent. Everything toi say will be recorded and will be used par us.
15. Hello, you've reached Jim and Sonya. We can't pick up the phone right now, because we're doing something we really enjoy. Sonya likes doing it up and down, and I like doing it left to right... real slowly. So leave a message, and when we're done brushing our teeth we'll get back to you.
(Big idea)
Another problem thats spreading on Fanpop. The problem is that people keep reporting people for dumb reasons. For example my friend some people reported her because she didnt agree with them and thats wrong. Like what happened to ''We are a big fanpop family''?. That doesnt even matter anymore does it ? Just when somebody makes toi mad ou doesnt agree with your point of view toi just rapporter them and thats just a whole bunch of bullshit. Like for real handle reporting responsibly if someone makes toi mad keep going on with life if someone doesnt agree with your view point just accept dont rapporter thm. Because we are a big family and we dont rapporter ou block family we care and montrer l’amour for them and YES we all argue its natural but just to rapporter someone is taking it too far
PLZ STOP IT!!
whos w/ me?
l’amour all around
-Jordan
Another problem thats spreading on Fanpop. The problem is that people keep reporting people for dumb reasons. For example my friend some people reported her because she didnt agree with them and thats wrong. Like what happened to ''We are a big fanpop family''?. That doesnt even matter anymore does it ? Just when somebody makes toi mad ou doesnt agree with your point of view toi just rapporter them and thats just a whole bunch of bullshit. Like for real handle reporting responsibly if someone makes toi mad keep going on with life if someone doesnt agree with your view point just accept dont rapporter thm. Because we are a big family and we dont rapporter ou block family we care and montrer l’amour for them and YES we all argue its natural but just to rapporter someone is taking it too far
PLZ STOP IT!!
whos w/ me?
l’amour all around
-Jordan
"Hello, is this the FBI?" "Yes, what do toi want?" "I'm calling to rapporter my neighbor Billy Bob Smith! He is hidingmarijuana inside his firewood." "Thank toi very much for the call, sir." The suivant day, the FBI agents descend on Billy Bob's house. They searchthe shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open everypiece of wood, butfind no marijuana. They swore at Billy Bob and left. The phone rings at Billy Bob's house. Hey, Billy Bob! Did the FBI come?" "Yeah!" "Did they chop your firewood?" "Yep." "Happy Birthday, Buddy!"
1. Your lire my article.
2. You're wondering why you're even lire this.
4. toi didn't notice that I misspelled you're on #1
5. And you're checking back now
6. Nor did toi notice I skipped number three.
7. toi don't even feel like checking back this time. You'll take my word for it..
8. This is so stupid that toi silently chuckle to yourself.
9. Then toi realize that six isn't true because that doesn't make sense and that this is a rip off.
10. But toi remember that a fact is something that can be proven right ou wrong, so technically it was a fact.
11. toi wish toi never began to read this stupid stuff now but its still hard to stop.
13. I didn't catch toi with the missing number this time. ou did I?
14. toi wonder why I'm being such a smart butt.
15. But then again, my mind lire powers amaze you.
16. toi totally forgot I was only supposed to tell toi ten facts.
2. You're wondering why you're even lire this.
4. toi didn't notice that I misspelled you're on #1
5. And you're checking back now
6. Nor did toi notice I skipped number three.
7. toi don't even feel like checking back this time. You'll take my word for it..
8. This is so stupid that toi silently chuckle to yourself.
9. Then toi realize that six isn't true because that doesn't make sense and that this is a rip off.
10. But toi remember that a fact is something that can be proven right ou wrong, so technically it was a fact.
11. toi wish toi never began to read this stupid stuff now but its still hard to stop.
13. I didn't catch toi with the missing number this time. ou did I?
14. toi wonder why I'm being such a smart butt.
15. But then again, my mind lire powers amaze you.
16. toi totally forgot I was only supposed to tell toi ten facts.
Ring a Ring a Rosies,
a pocket full of posies
ATISHOO ATISHOO, we all fall down
Known to be a song about a ring of roses, little children chant in a row, then toi sneeze and toi fall down. Did toi ever play that game as a young child? Hold hands and dance in a circle?
Now for the reality.
This nursery rhyme is about the Black Plague.
Ring a ring a rosies - toi used to have large pinky red circles on your skin, this is how toi knew toi had the plague.
A pocket full of posies - People used to hold posies up to their nose to keep the smell of death away. They also believed that it would keep the plague away. (didn't work)
Atishoo Atishoo we all fall down - toi know what THAT means? if not that, people would sneeze and cough and you'd know that OHMYGOD WERE DYING! And you'd all fall down (basically, you've popped your clogs)
Some people think it is a very, haunting, creepy song if sung in a certain way other than the cheerful way.
Randomness lol.
a pocket full of posies
ATISHOO ATISHOO, we all fall down
Known to be a song about a ring of roses, little children chant in a row, then toi sneeze and toi fall down. Did toi ever play that game as a young child? Hold hands and dance in a circle?
Now for the reality.
This nursery rhyme is about the Black Plague.
Ring a ring a rosies - toi used to have large pinky red circles on your skin, this is how toi knew toi had the plague.
A pocket full of posies - People used to hold posies up to their nose to keep the smell of death away. They also believed that it would keep the plague away. (didn't work)
Atishoo Atishoo we all fall down - toi know what THAT means? if not that, people would sneeze and cough and you'd know that OHMYGOD WERE DYING! And you'd all fall down (basically, you've popped your clogs)
Some people think it is a very, haunting, creepy song if sung in a certain way other than the cheerful way.
Randomness lol.