Gordan Freeman

79 Things to do in an Elevator (Soooo funny)

1. Crack open your mallette, porte-documents ou handbag, peer inside and ask "Got enough air in there?"
2. Stand silent and motionless in the corner facing the mur without getting off.
3. When arriving at your floor, grunt and strain to yank the doors open, then act as if you're embarrassed when they open themselves.
4. Greet everyone with a warm handshake and ask him ou her to call toi Admiral.
5. Meow occasionally.
6. Stare at another passenger for a while. Then announce in horror: "You're one of THEM!" - and back away slowly.
7. Say "DING!" at each floor.
8. Say "I...

CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with feu at one end and a fool at the other!


MARRIAGE:
It's an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master


LECTURE:
An art of transmitting Information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either


CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied par the number present


COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece


TEARS:
The hydraulic force par which masculine will power is defeated par feminine water-power!...

NOT par ME~~~~~~♥♥♥

1. Don't tell us when toi think other girls are hot.
2. Whenever possible, please say whatever toi have to say during commercials.
3. If toi don't act like soap-opera guys, don't expect us to dress like Victoria's Secret models.
4. Mark anniversaries on a calendar.
5. There is no such thing as too much spooning.
6. We think about toi ALL the time.
7. This is how we see it . . . Don't call = Don't Care.
8. Which also means that if we don't call, take the hint.
9. We like toi to be a little jealous . . . but overly possessive is not necessary.
10. We hate that toi can eat all you...

1. Drive through the drive-thru in reverse and let your passenger order.

2. Ask the price of almost everything on the menu and then order something that toi didn't ask the price for.

3. Tell the employee that your window is broken. Order and then pay with your door open. When the nourriture comes, roll down the window and snatch your order from their hands.


4. Go to McDonald's and demand a big breakfast at 11:30 at night. Put up a fight.


5. Pay for a large order in pennies.


6. Drive in circles around the drive through, ording just one item of your order each time toi pass the window. For added fun,...