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posted by Gretute2772
1.Most football players run 7 miles in a game.
2.The only 2 animaux that can see behind itself without turning its head are the rabbit and the parrot.
3.Whip makes a cracking sound because its tip moves faster than the speed of sound.
4.It cost 7 million dollars to build the Titanic and 200 million to make a film about it.
5.When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.
6.Every time toi sneeze some of your brain cells die.
7.Your left lung is smaller than your right lung to make room for your heart.
8.Laughing lowers levels of stress hormones and strengthens the immune system. Six-year-olds laugh an average of 300 times a day. Adults only laugh 15 to 100 times a day.
9.Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep toi from crying.
10.The Boeing 747 is capable of flying upside-down if it weren’t for the fact that the wings would shear off when trying to roll it over.
11.Never hold your nose and cover your mouth when sneezing, as it can blow out your eyeballs.
12.The world’s smartest pig, owned par a mathematics teacher in Madison, WI, memorized the multiplication tables up to 12.
13.In ancient Greece, children of wealthy families were dipped in olive oil at birth to keep them hairless throughout their lives.
14.Every Labrador retriever dreams about bananas once in a while.
15.Approximately one-sixth of your life is spent on Wednesdays.
16.You can actually sharpen the blades on a pencil sharpener par wrapping your pencils in aluminum foil before inserting them.
17.111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,321
18.12 newborns will be donné to the wrong parents daily.
19.123,000,000 cars are being driven down the U.S’s highways.
20.160 cars can drive side par side on the Monumental Axis in Brazil, the world’s widest road.
21.A cockroach can live several weeks with its head cut off.
22.A company in Taiwan makes dinnerware out of wheat, so toi can eat your plate.
23.A cow produces 200 times plus gas a jour than a person.
24.A dime has 118 ridges around the edge.
25.A dragonfly has a lifespan of 24 hours.
26.A giraffe can clean its ears with its 21-inch tongue.
27.A giraffe can go without water longer than a chameau can.
28.A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.
29.A pregnant goldfish is called a twit.
30.A Saudi Arabian woman can get a divorce if her husband doesn’t give her coffee.
31.A requin is the only poisson that can blink with both eyes.
32.A quarter has 119 grooves on its edge, a dime has one less groove.
33.A whale’s penis is called a dork.
34.America once issued a 5-cent bill.
35.An iguana can stay under water for 28 minutes.
36.An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain.
37.Bats always turn left when exiting a cave.
38.Ben and Jerry’s send the waste from making ice cream to local pig farmers to use as feed. Pigs l’amour the stuff, except for one flavor: Mint Oreo.
39.Dolphins sleep with one eye open.
40.Hershey’s Kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it’s s’embrasser the conveyor belt.
41.If a statue in the park of a person on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle; if the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle; if the horse has all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.
42.If toi toss a penny 10,000 times, it will not be heads 5,000 times, but plus like 4,950. The heads picture weighs more, so it ends up on the bottom.
43.In most advertisements, including newspapers, the time displayed on a watch is 10:10.
44.It’s impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. (Don’t try this at home!)
45.More Monopoly money is printed in a year, than real money printed throughout the world.
46.More people are killed annually par donkeys than die in air crashes.
47.More people use blue toothbrushes, than red ones.
48.Mosquitoes have teeth.
49.Most Americans’ car horns beep in the key of F.
50.Most cows give plus lait when they listen to music.
51.Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin.
52.Most lipstick contains poisson scales.
53.Over 1000 birds a an die from smashing into windows.
54.Owls are one of the only birds who can see the color blue.
55.The average person falls asleep in seven minutes.
56.The average person has over 1,460 dreams a year.
57.The average person is about a quarter of an inch taller at night.
58.The average person’s left hand does 56% of the typing.
59.The only 15 letter word that can be spelled without repeating a letter is uncopyrightable.
60.The only nation whose name begins with an “A” but doesn’t end in an “A” is Afghanistan.
61.The “save” icone on Microsoft Word shows a floppy disk, with the obturateur on backwards.
62.There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.
63.There are 336 dimples on a regulation golf ball.
64.There are over 52.6 million chiens in the U.S.
65.There are plus chickens than people in the world.
66.There are plus plastic flamingos in America than real ones.
67.There are only four words in the English language which end in “-dous”: tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous.
68.There are only thirteen blimps in the world. Nine of them are in the United States.
69.When snakes are born with two heads, they fight each other for food.
70.Windmills always turn counter-clockwise. Except for the windmills in Ireland.
71.You’re born with 300 bones, but when toi get to be an adult, toi only have 206.
72.You’re plus likely to get stung par a bee on a windy jour than in any other weather.
73.Windmills always turn counter-clockwise. Except for the windmills in Ireland.
74.The sound of E.T. walking was made par someone squishing her hands in Jello.
75.The starfish is one of the only animaux who can turn it’s stomach inside-out.
76.The state of Florida is bigger than England.
77.The name Wendy was made up for the book “Peter Pan.”
78.The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses. No one in Greece has memorized all 158 verses.
79.The Neanderthal’s brain was bigger than yours is.
80.The oldest known goldfish lived to 41 years of age. Its name was Fred.
81.The giant squid has the largest eyes in the world.
82.The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.
83.The highest point in Pennsylvania is lower than the lowest point in Colorado.
84.The housefly hums in the middle octave, key of F.
85.The international telephone dialing code for Antarctica is 672.
86.The katydid bug hears through holes in its hind legs.
87.The “L.L.” in L.L. haricot, fève stands for Leon Leonwood.
88.The longest one-syllable word in the English language is “screeched.”
89.The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.
90.The longest word in the English language, according to the oxford English Dictionary, is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis. The only other word with the same amount of letters is pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconioses, its plural.
91.The Main bibliothèque at Indiana université sinks over an inch every an because when it was built, engineers failed to take into account the weight of all the livres that would occupy the building.
92.The Boston université Bridge (on Commonwealth Avenue, Boston, Massachusetts) is the only place in the world where a bateau can sail under a train driving under a car driving under an airplane.
93.The characters Bert and Ernie on Sesame rue were named after Bert the cop and Ernie the taxi driver in Frank Capra’s “Its A Wonderful Life”.
94.The condom – made originally of linen – was invented in the early 1500s.
95.The cruise liner, Queen Elizabeth II, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.
96.The Earth weighs around 6,588,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 tons.
97.The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war ou other emergencies.
98.The electric chair was invented par a dentist.
99.The éléphant is the only mammal that can’t jump.
100.The first Ford cars had Dodge engines.
posted by Feathershine
1. When their watching TV get in their way and say "I'm in your way!! Im in your way!!"
2. Say "beep, beep beep..." until they snap
3. Call them on their cell phone when their out on a rendez-vous amoureux, date ou something, and in a weird voice say "Hello?! Can I send u a box of waffles" (LOL I don't know)
4. When their sleeping take a bottle of water and wake them up par dumping it on them and saying "Sorry! I came to bring it for u to drink, I didn't realize it slipped"
5. If toi have a dog ou cat (that DON'T sleep with your parents) dump him/her when there asleep
6. When toi spill any liquid blame it on the gods
7....
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1.find something old and breakable and go up to a apartment ou building ou highest floor in your house and open a window and estimate how long it will take that thing to hit the groung then throw it out the the window and cout how many seconds/minutes it takes to hit the ground really.
2.go to wal-mart,enough said
3.go outside and try to sell a old stuffed animal on a leash to people who look important to society,like hobos
4.go to your neighbors and tell them they need to stop the rucus and to shut up your trying to sleep even if its the middle of the jour and they arent making any noise
5.go to...
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posted by x-menobsessed26
Useful Hawaiian Phrases
On the Plane
My how your perfume fills the entire cabin!
'A'ala maoli keia wahi o kakou i kau wai 'ala kuikawa!


If I snore, I would like to apologize in advance
Ke nono au, e kala mua mai, i keia manawa ho'i.


I am filled with admiration for my in-flight meal
Kahaha ko'u na'au i ke 'ano o ka mea 'ai ma keia mokulele.


Only six dollars for a headset? Why thats only three dollars per ear!
Eono kala no ka ho'olohe lekio? 'O ia ho'i, 'ekolu wale no kala o kahi pepeiao!


Baby, Severe Turbulance is my middle name
E ku'u kumu e, mai hopohopo, ua kapa 'ia ko'u inoa waena, 'o ia 'o Severe...
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posted by ciaraluvsjustin
1.Bring a pillow.Fall asleep[or pretend to]until the last 15 minutes.Wake up,say"Oh Geez,better get cracking"and do some gibberish work.Turn it in a few minutes early
2.Get a copy of the exam,run out screaming "Andre Andre I've got the secret documents!!"
3.If it is a math/science exam,answer in essay form.If it is a long answer/essay form answer in numbers ou symbols.Be creative.
4.Make paper airplanes out of the exam.Throw them at the instructors left nostril.
5.Talk the entire way through the exam.Read questions out loud,debate your réponses with yourself out loud.If asked to stop, yell out"I'M...
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"An old woman haunted me!"

One night my and par brothers and I were sleeping up stairs while my mom was downstairs reading. I was lying in lit and heard this light stomping sound. Then the stomping sound got a little heavier. Soon, it became so loud that my brothers and I all came out of our room because we were scared. My mom had heard it too and she thought it was one of us playing a joke, but it wasn't - we were all in bed! We had no idea what to make of it and were really freaked out. But then, things got creepier....

"We found her stuff in the attic, her name was Tamara!"

I went over to...
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posted by jblovesme4ever
[]miley cyrus the girl who many of whom look up to but why[
resons to hate her(feel free to add plus on comments)

1)[]her music]: she doesnt write it on her own and her newest song untamed wow the part where she says I GO THOUGHT BOYS LIKE MONEY:and the only good song she has is the climb: and that is not saying much!!!:patry in the usa wow that is the s&^%$#@ musique vidio i have seen it a while

2)money: the only reson she is here is bcus she wants money: she has to get payed to do chairty events:and she is always just talking about it to

3)she doesnt care about her fans: she may say she doese...
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posted by deathchick9
Over the many years of pikachu,if toi look closely Pikachu has been getting thinner and thinner.When it started he was this cute,fat little chunk of Pokemon,but now he's a skinny little freak.Which can only me one thing....Ash has forced him to become bulimic!
*Dramatizations*
____________________________________
Ash:Jeez,Pikachu your so fat!

Pikachu:Pika?

________________________

Ash:Loose some weight toi fat bastard!

Pikachu:Pika?!
_________________________________________

Ash:No stop eating!Your just gonna get fatter!

*Ash shoves his finger down pikachu's throat to make him vomit his nourriture up.Pikachu...
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posted by melcu
1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with Friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If toi have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

6. Amuse yourself for endless hours par hooking a caméscope to your TV and then pointing it at the screen. <

7. Speak only in a "robot" voice.

8. Push all the flat Lego pieces together tightly.

9. Start each meal par conspicuously licking...
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posted by ihavOTD
 I am Anti- Miley because of this:
I am Anti- Miley because of this:
OH MY GOSH! I was just watching stupid HM and near the end, Miley and Lily started talking about-guess who? ROBERT PATTINSON. That's sick. here is their convo:(at least what though I heard)

" It's just sad that toi can't find a bf..." Lily says.
" Yeah... Hey, I guess Hannah can rendez-vous amoureux, date Robert Pattinson!" Miley says
" Oh....Robert Pattinson is SO dreamy...."
Thats sickening Disney. I feel bad for Rob. He can't hide ANYWHERE...
Really, do toi realize how crazy and gross a lot of fans are???? Here is a gross article about some crazed fans:

Robert Pattinson Approached par “Gross”, “Bleeding”...
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added by SheWolf11
Source: I DO NOT OWN THIS IMAGE
Similar to "30 Things To Do During An Exam." chercher for it in this club, it's way funnier. Apologies if this liste is a little outdated.

50 Ways to Mess With People in a Computer Lab

1. Log on, wait a sec, then get a frightened look on your face and scream "Oh my God! They've found me!" and bolt.
2. Laugh uncontrollably for about 3 minutes & then suddenly stop and look suspiciously at everyone who looks at you.
3. When your computer is turned off, complain to the monitor on duty that toi can't get the damn thing to work. After he/she's turned it on, wait 5 minutes, turn it off again, & repeat...
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added by totoyo25
added by tdacrazy6
Source: Tumblr
posted by Bluekait
Example:

There's someone knockin' on my door

There in the shadows, looks like a hand

Come to the rescue now

Once there was a man who decided he knew everything

Life's been so good to me

I went to see what I could find

toi never lived in the streets though toi wish toi had

I'm so sorry, please forgive me

Living in the sixth dimension

Over time I've come to feel

------------------------------------------------------------------

If toi need help ou another example for a better understanding, let me know.
added by CokeTheUmbreon
posted by Seanthehedgehog
Langley, West Virginia.

Commander Kane: *Walks up to Ted* How are the new watches coming out?
Ted: I think you'll be pleased with the work me, and Mabel did. par the way, how's Johnny doing?
Commander Kane: We found a replacement who's willing to use his name to protect his identity.

Sundsvall Sweden. Johnny Lightning was driving south on the Sundsvallbron. A bridge that was part of the E4 highway. His car was a shiny silver Alfa Romeo.

Johnny: *Smiling as he looks at himself in the rear view mirror. He then sees a red Nissan close to him*

The red car overtook him, and a black man pointed a MP7 at...
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 Yes toi are.
Yes you are.
Good jour everyone.

I just wanted to quickly write this article after thinking about it last night because I couldn't help but to feel the need to say something to everyone who is struggling with life.


Life is tough? yeah it fucking is man!! but guess what if your thoughts are stuck negatively toi going nowhere in progress you'll only sink plus and plus into depression.


Even if toi feel toi couldn't!!!! get a grip and try a hundred times never give up.

It's impossible to go vers l'avant, vers l’avant without one strong step from you.

Somehow you'll manage, learn how to trick your brain into positive thinking it will...
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posted by Seanthehedgehog
In the United Kingdom, a dark green Jaguar F-Type was chasing a Toyota Tundra.

British Agent: *Driving the F-Type* Goal Keeper, this is Chelsea. I'm in pursuit of the bandits.
MI6 Operator: Chelsea, this is Goal Keeper, we're tracking your progress so far. Don't let them escape with those plans.
British Agent: Roger sir. I won't let toi down.
MI6 Clerk: *Walks towards the Operator* What plans did they steal from us?
MI6 Operator: Plans for a special motorcycle with a hang glider.
MI6 Clerk: *Looks at the Operator's computer screen* What's that to the right of Chelsea?
MI6 Operator: It looks like a...
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When I was a teenager, I tried to be a film reviewer. I would write user reviews on a website called Common Sense Media. The problem was that I didn't know what I was talking about, yet I kept écriture reviews. On Common Sense Media, there was an option for users to rate films on a five-star basis. One étoile, star is the lowest and five stars is the highest.

After seeing my old reviews for the first time in years, I cringed. However, I quickly got over that and got amused over my failed attempts at being a reviewer. I thought I'd share some of my most odd reviews. Keep in mind that I no longer mean...
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