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posted by slenderman777
1. The last thing i saw was my alarm clock flashing 12:07 before she pushed her long rotting nails through my chest her other hand muffling my screams, i sat bolt up right glad it was just a dream but as i saw my alarm clock read 12:06 i heard the closet door creak open.

2. Growing up with pets i was used to scratching on my bedroom door, now that i live alone its much plus unsettling.

3. In all the times i lived in this house, i swear to god i closed plus doors then i open.

4. I thought my cat had a staring problem she always was looking at my face, until one jour when i realized that she was always looking just behind me.

5. Theres nothing like the laughter of a baby, unless it's 1 am and you're accueil alone.

6. She went to check on her sleeping toddler, the window was open and the lit was empty
Wake up to your dreams
And watch them come true
I'll make toi whisper my name, I'll never leave the room
Night and day, I'll be your muse
No other girl can make toi feel the way I do
I can make the stars dance
Light up the moon, I can make the stars dance
If toi want me to
The sky is everywhere, so meet me under there
I can make the stars dance dance dance with you
Don't be afraid, close your eyes
Let me take toi to places you've never been tonight
I thought par know you'd realize I can do anything I put my mind to
I can make the stars dance
Light up the moon, I can make the stars dance
If toi want me to
The...
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1. They feel happy and like nothing can take them down.
2. They start feeling depressed for no reason.
3. They feel like crying for a while.
4. They cry heavily and not knowing why their crying makes it worse.
5. They feel mad and feels like everyone should feel her wrath.
6. They feel so alone and unloved par everyone, some are driven to cut themselves.
7. They feel like only God understands them.
8. Their time of the mois is over and they normal again.
This is what i went through, so i assume other girls do to.
posted by IloveMyLord

In jealousy there is plus of self-love than love.
FranÁois de la Rochefoucauld
A competent and self-confident person is incapable of jealousy in anything. Jealousy is invariably a symptom of neurotic insecurity.
Robert A. Heinlein
There is no greater glory than love, nor any greater punishment than jealousy.
Lope de Vega
Jealous people poison their own banquet and then eat it
unknown
Peace of mind makes the body healthy, but jealousy is like a cancer.
Bible
Jealousy is the dragon in paradise; the hell of heaven; and the most amer of the emotions because associated with the sweetest.
A.R. Orage...
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Dani Stump Quotes

“Like my friend always said...this sounds like a personal problem”

“The weird thing about being married to the lead singer of Fall Out Boy and being a lead singer myself is that Patrick's a Rock singer...and I'm a Heavy Metal singer”

“The musique genre that always got to me was Heavy Metal...that's why Party Poison can be classified as a Heavy Metal band”

“The ones who influenced me was Dragonforce and Metallica....the ones who influence me now is of course Patrick Stump of Fall Out Boy and Gerard Way of My Chemical Romance”

“I'm a wife, I'm a mother, I'm a artist...
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You’re now chatting with a aléatoire stranger. Say hi!

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WOOF

Stranger: WOOF

You: meow

You: meow

You: meow

Stranger: WOOF

You: meow

Stranger: WOOF

You: meow

You: NOT ANOTHER DOG! O_O

Stranger: HAHAHAHAHHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!! 8D

You: toi HAVE GOT TO BE KITTEN ME. T_T

Stranger: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHA I SEE WHAT toi DID THERE!!! KI FUCKING SAW IT!!!! 8D

You: O_O

You: I AM A MAGICAL CAT.

Stranger: ZALDGFALDGASDFALDFGALDSFGASDA OH MY GOD. IM A MAGICAL BURRITO. WANNA...
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posted by dylin1
Time for some fun... MDR twss

Body: TEN THINGS ABOUT toi
1. Are toi single?
Yeah.

2. Are toi happy about that?
no

3. Are toi bored?
YES

4. Are toi sad?
Nah.

5. Are toi Italian?
No...

6. Are toi pregnant?
HELL NO

8. Are toi cool?
The coolest person you'll ever meet!!!

9. Are toi Irish?
Yeah

10. Are your parents still married?
Nope

TEN FACTS
1. Full Name:
Madylin Sage Duce

2. What are your nicknames?
"that girl who ______" fill in the blank.

3. Birth place:
Whitehorse, Yukon, Canada

4. Hair color:
Light Brown.

5. Hair style:
sheiber

7. Birthday:
august 8, 97

8. Mood:
chill

9. favori color:
black,white,blue,purple,red....
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posted by ultimatefredde
1. Guys for gods sake, dont pretend being something toi aren´t girls have a sixth sense we don´t have and find out sooner ou later

2. Dance!

3.Flirt, they aren´t the only ones who should do this.

4.Tell her what toi really enjoy in life

5.Help them out when needed.

6.Avoid playing those "Gay games" with your pals, it´s just not right

7.avoid grabbing your "parts" on public. Really.

8.Be original, with gifts, don´t just give flowers, ou take her to dinner, also sometimes a card ou a simple walk in the park is good to try

9.Be romantic and take shyness away

10. Express your feelings, toi wont die...
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posted by JonasLuver1
Why Guys l’amour Girls:

1. The way they always smell good even if it’s just shampoo
2. The way they always find the right spot on our shoulder
3. How cute they look when they sleep
4. The ease in which they fit into our ams
5. The way they Kiss toi ad make everything alright in the world
6. How cute they are when they eat
7. The way they take hours to get dressed but in the it’s all worthwhile
8. The way they are always warm even if it’s minus 30 degrees
9. The way the look good no matter what they wear
10. The way she fished for compliments even though toi both know she’s the most beautiful...
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posted by ilovetech29
1."My son is under a doctor's care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him."
2."Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick, and I had her shot."
3."Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33."
4."Please excuse Gloria from Jim today. She is administrating."
5."Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a arbre and misplaced his hip."
6."John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face."
7."Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part."
8."Megan...
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Just lire some of the Terminator citations through again... and actually found a hint on what happened between Arnold and the maid. Enjoy my version!


Maid: Nice night for a walk, eh?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Nice night for a walk.
Maid #2: Wash jour tomorrow? Nothing clean, right?
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Nothing clean. Right.
Maid: Hey, I think this guy's a couple cans short of a six-pack.
Arnold Schwarzenegger: Your clothes... give them to me, now.
Maid: Fuck you, asshole!
Arnold nods.


I know there are a lot of people making fun of Arnold Schwarzenegger since he admitted to his wife that he's not only a cheater but a liar as well. toi might get annoyed par it and think "Oh poor Arnie". But honestly? This guy just ASKED for it. It takes a big jerk to have a child with another woman, an even bigger one to keep it a secret for 14 years and the biggest one to only reveal it to his wife after he quit his job so there'd be no damage to his position.
posted by lloonny
1. Chuck Norris does not wear a condom. Because there is no such thing as protection from Chuck Norris.
2. Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas
3. Chuck Norris will never have a cœur, coeur attack. His cœur, coeur isn't nearly foolish enough to attack him.
4. If at first toi don't succeed, you're not Chuck Norris.
5. Chuck Norris can set ants on feu with a magnifying glass. At night.
6. Chuck Norris doesn't breathe, he holds air hostage.
7. Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
8. They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
9....
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posted by KateKicksAss
 This is your new mascot. All hail the bunny!
This is your new mascot. All hail the bunny!
Of course, if toi are TRULY random, toi shouldn't even need a guide, O_O

Randomness, randomosity, randomology, whatever toi may call it, is using improvisation to create original humorous phrases ou monologues ou pine cones on the spot. 'Randomosity' is fun to express in the presence of Friends ou logging companies, but can quickly become extremely obnoxious. Have fun with your randomness, don't force it. Remember, if toi got it, Flaunt it!

Steps

1. Break free of conventional rules. Finishing your sentences is not mandatory, merely optional and toi can do it on Tuesdays but not on Wednesdays...
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"An old woman haunted me!"

One night my and par brothers and I were sleeping up stairs while my mom was downstairs reading. I was lying in lit and heard this light stomping sound. Then the stomping sound got a little heavier. Soon, it became so loud that my brothers and I all came out of our room because we were scared. My mom had heard it too and she thought it was one of us playing a joke, but it wasn't - we were all in bed! We had no idea what to make of it and were really freaked out. But then, things got creepier....

"We found her stuff in the attic, her name was Tamara!"

I went over to...
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posted by yoshifan1976
Doctor Mario was in his office when suddenly there was an urgent phone call. It was Daisy. "Mario, come quick. Luigi's very sick." "I'll be there right now, Daisy", Mario told her. Nurse pêche, peach was very concerned. "What's wrong, Mario?" "Luigi's sick", he answered with worry. "Go", pêche, peach told him kindly. "I can take care of things here." "Thanks, Peach". He gave her a Kiss and then rode over to Luigi and Daisy's house. marguerite, daisy hugged Mario and led him upstairs. "Hey little brother", he smiled at Luigi. Luigi smiled back. He loves his big brother Mario. No one understood the brotherly bond between...
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added by loonybug
Source: tumblr
No, I seriously hate it whenever I hear kids talk about Disney and celebrities, they say crap like "OMG Justin Bieber is awesome!" "The Jonas Brothers are having a new movie!" "Have toi watched Shake it up? It's the best thing Disney has made!"
It sickens me that parents allow their kids to watch & listen to the mediocre shit Disney Channel produces now rather than to have them watch & listen to some REAL Disney & music. Even the trash films like Prom, John Carter, Mars Needs Moms, and some of the Disney direct-to-video sequels are better than the crap Disney Channel has to offer....
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posted by hetalianstella
This is in no particular order.

- I hate how people automatically assume toi are Chinese just because you're Asian, ou automatically assume toi are Mexican just because toi are Hispanic.

- How people always say they COULD care less when they COULDN'T care less!

- When people use an elevator.....for one floor!

- Perverts....I mean, I don't hate perverts. Some of my best Friends are perverts. But I'm not a pervert, so don't act like a pervert around me. Anywhere else is fine, but please respect my asexuality.

- When people overuse lol.
Especially when there is nothing funny!
Same with OMG. I...
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Hello. To start off i like going on the internet, my favori website is youtube. for some of toi who don't know it's a famous video sharing website that let's toi share videos, alot of people tend to mettre en ligne gaming vidéos ou musique ou vidéos of there cat.

I mostly watch a lot of the good Youtube channels like Seananners ou Vanoss and much more, and i sometimes watch aléatoire peoples channels. Like go to a video that has lots of views, click on some aléatoire persons channel via the comments. Sometimes i find great channels with great videos, but when i clicked on one certain channel my life was forever...
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posted by deathding
Hello there! My name is Jared, and I was a huge fan of this old blog named Ask Dr. Robotnik, but it was cancelled due to his life having too much work.

But I plan on reviving it and doing my own take on it, but if you're not familiar with it, here's how it works.

toi type in the commentaires section something to ask Dr. Robotnik and I'll answer it with a funny picture/text/both. It may not sound that fun at first, but believe me when I say it is.

To get started, all toi have to do is type into the commentaires section something to ask Dr. Robotnik, and once we get 5+ commentaires I'll make a new article answering them with funny pictures and text!

This is for you, Matt. :) Thanks for all the good times.

 commentaire now!
Comment now!
added by 3xZ
Source: disneyscreencaps.com