Why Did the Chicken traverser, croix the Road?


George W. Bush: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road ou not. The chicken is either with us ou it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

Bill Clinton: I did not traverser, croix the road with THAT chicken. What do toi mean par chicken? Could toi define chicken, please?

Einstein: Whether the chicken crossed the road ou the road moved beneath the chicken depends upon your frame of reference.

Bill Gates: I have just released the new Chicken Office 2000, which will not only traverser, croix roads, but...

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Childbirth is the seconde most painful thing in the world, right suivant to being burned alive.

You are plus likely to get struck par lightning than to be attacked and killed par a bear.

It is unlawful to sit on the floor anywhere in the US Capitol building. It is considered to be protesting.

The chicken is the closest living relative to the T-Rex.

Elephants are the only animal that have 4 knees. They also are the only animal that can't jump.

The United States has never Lost a war in which mules were used.

Vaccinations contain dead bacteria cells. The bacteria cells are inserted into your body so that...

1.When someone remembers the things toi say
2.Cute sneezes
3.Laughing until my stomach hurts
4.Waking up with perfect hair
5.The sound of little kid’s uncontrollable laughter
6.People who except my extreme weirdness
7.People who remember me after meeting me once
8.Getting an A on a test I didn’t study for
9.When the first text toi see is from the person toi l’amour <3
10.When your plans don’t work out but your jour turned perfect anyway
11.Seeing a baby laugh
12.That one person who knows toi better than toi know yourself
13.When a friendly stranger smiles at you
14.The cold side of the pillow
15.Knowing...

Yay! girls,these days short hair is in. But if toi have just cut your hair short and toi don't know how to style it, it can be a challenge. Today we have some tips for toi :D

Very Short:

This would be like the cut that Emma Watson has. It is a cut that gives the face a mysterious look to it. All your can do with a cut this short is style it a bit with gel, ou play around with the badg if toi have them. toi need to be sure that toi want this look, because once you've got it, there is little toi can do about it.

Medium-Short Hair:

This is a good option for those who want to try out short hair but...

1. If they want to loan toi money, tell them toi just filed for bankruptcy and toi could sure use some money.

2. If they start out with, "How are toi today?" say, "Why do toi want to know?" Alternately, toi can tell them, "I'm so glad toi asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my sciatica is jouer la comédie up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..." When they try to get to the sell, just keep talking about your "problems."

3. If they say they're Joe Doe from the XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them...

Better save that. We'll need it for the autopsy.

Someone call the janitor - we're going to need a mop.

"Accept this sacrifice, O Great Lord of Darkness"

Bo! Bo! Come back with that! Bad Dog!

Wait a minute, if this is his spleen, then what's that?

Hand me that....uh....that uh....thingie.

Oh no! I just Lost my Rolex.

Oops! Hey, has anyone ever survived 500ml of this stuff before?

Darn, there go the lights again...

Ya know, there's big money in kidneys. Heck, the guy's got two of 'em.

Everybody stand back! I Lost my contact lens!

Could toi stop that thing from beating? It's throwing my concentration...

These are purported to be actual test réponses from various schools in the Huntsville, Alabama metropolitan area.

Q: Name the four seasons.
A: Salt, pepper, mustard, and vinegar.

Q: Explain one of the processes par which water can be made sûr, sans danger to drink.
A: Flirtation makes water sûr, sans danger to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep, and canoeists.

Q: How is dew formed?
A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire.

Q: What is a planet?
A: A body of earth surrounded par sky.

SOCIOLOGY
Q: What guarantees may a mortgage company insist on?
A: If toi are buying a house,...