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When you're happy and toi know it bomb Iraq
If toi cannot find Osama, bomb Iraq.
If the markets are a drama, bomb Iraq.
If the terrorists are frisky,
Pakistan is looking shifty,
North Korea is too risky,
Bomb Iraq.

If toi never were elected, bomb Iraq.
If your mood is quite dejected, bomb Iraq.
If toi think Saddam's gone mad,
With the weapons that he had,
(And he tried to kill your dad),
Bomb Iraq.

If we have no allies with us, bomb Iraq.
If we think someone's dismissed us, bomb Iraq.
So to hell with the inspections,
Let's look tough for the elections,
Close your mind and take directions,
Bomb Iraq.

If your corporate fraud is growin', bomb Iraq.
If your ties to it are showin', bomb Iraq.
If your politics are sleazy,
And hiding that ain't easy,
And your manhood's getting queasy,
Bomb Iraq.

It's 'pre-emptive non-aggression', bomb Iraq.
Let's prevent this mass destruction, bomb Iraq.
They've got weapons we can't see,
And that's good enough for me
'Cos it's all the proof I need
Bomb Iraq.

Fall in line and follow orders, bomb Iraq.
For our might knows not our borders, bomb Iraq.
Disagree? We'll call it treason,
Let's make war not l’amour this season,
Even if we have no reason,
Bomb Iraq.


Last night I lay in my lit looking up at the stars,
the beautiful sky and the endless horizon
and suddenly I thought where the fuck is my roof?

To all medics: As from may 2001 viagra will only be available from the pharmacy under its chemical name. Please ask for ……….
Mycoxaflopin    

Humpty dumpty fucked a fat whore,
Humpty dumpty fell on the floor,
All the kings chevaux
and all the kings men bent the chienne over
and fucked her again

Sing a song of syphillis
a fanny fulla crabs
four and twenty blackheads twice as many scabs,
when the scabs pop open
the heads begin to sing
wasn't it a minging cunt to stick your penis in

It's not the length its not the size
its how many times toi can make it rise

roses are red Violets are blue
I have crabs and now so do you


(for Mobile phone)
Do u take me 2 b ur lawful wedded text m8,
2 have & 2 hold 4 dirty jokes & saucy quotes,
through poor reception & no signal,
until low battery do us part.

Last night i wanted toi
I needed toi so badly it hurt.
I wanted you
inside me to work your magic on me
but i couldn't find toi
………… stupid paracetamol

Sex is a sin,
sins are forbidden,
sins are forgiven
so get stuck in

I l’amour the way it rubs against my soft rose flesh
and creates a foamy liquid
as it thrusts in and out up and down
I can't wait for the suivant time
I l’amour my toothbrush

Twinkle, twinkle, massive knob.
Mary likes it in her gob
but when she feels that certaim twitch
she pulls it out the spiteful bitch.

Three blond MEN are stranded on one side of a wide river, and don't know how to get across.
The first man prays to God to make him smart enough to figure out how to traverser, croix the river, so God turns him into a brown-haired man and he swims across.
The seconde man prays to God to make him even smarter, so God turns him into a dark-haired man and he builds a bateau and rows across.
Then the third man prays to God to make him the smartest of all, so God turns him into a woman and he walks across the bridge

(for a mobile phone)
You're so sexy, toi drive me insane.
toi fuck me so hard I'm always in pain.
Your sexy voice puts in slumber.
Oh fuck I'm sorry I've got the wrong number...

Mirror, mirror on the wall,
whos the fairest of them all?
The mirror laughed and gave a grunt,
Its not you, toi ugly cunt!
OK, this article is going to be in the point of view of many different characters. Before it begins in their point of view it will have their names.
BELLA
Edward wasn't a school today, too sunny, I'm guessing. The Cullens are probably out hunting. Charlie had a dit that where the Cullens "hike" is filled with bears. I'm pretty sure that they are hunting somewhere else today, so I would like to see how it looks up there. I pulled on some hiking boots and got in my truck.
Eventually I reached the place. I was standing on the side of a small cliff. I found a few ours prints, and started to wander...
continue reading...
posted by invadercalliope
CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLIIIIII
IIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
PPPPPEEEEE
EEEEEEEEEEE
CCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEELLLLL!
HI EVERYONE!
TODAYS MY 2 EPISODE!
YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!
ITS ME INVADER CALLIOPE YOUR HOST!
NOW ITS TIME TO TALK ABOUT THE SPECAIL GUEST étoile, star ZIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
clapdy clap clap
Invader Callipe:HI ZIM
Zim:I'M NORMAL *walks away*
WELL BYE ZIIIIIIIIIIIM!
WELL GOODBYE EVERYONE THIS IS THE END OF EPISODE 2!
SEE YA LATER BYE BYE EVERYONE!
The End!
Miss Carey: Hello, Allex! Come in!
Allex: Hi! What's happening here?
Mady: It's drama club.
Miss Carey: Come and rejoindre us!
Allex: Ok. What are toi doing?
Ed: We're putting on a play.
Allex: Really? Can i be in it? I like acting.
Nicki: He's a really good actor, Miss Carey.
Miss Carey: Excellent!
Allex: What's the play?
Mady: It's The Ugly Duckling.
Allex: Oh... That's for little children.
Mady: Yes, we're doing it for kindergarten.
Nicki: It's fun!
Ed: I'm the kind man.
Mady: I'm the kind man's doughter.
Alex: What about me?
Miss Carey: You, Alex, can be the ugly duckling.
posted by shutyourface
don't worry this article is not about mouton, moutons ou bananas it is about a plus serious matter.

this is a débats and i want everyone lire this
écriture a commentaire about what toi think is write ou wrong
ok?

so anyway

here i go


what came first

the egg

ou the chicken?

thats my débats and i want EVERYONE who's a fan
of aléatoire to write what they think is right


and become a fan of me and become a fan of my
article

and remember

what came first
the egg
ou the chicken

i am only doing this because i have been
wondering that for ages
EPISODE ONE:

Spike: [snoring]

Twilight: Let's go through this one plus time.

Rainbow Dash: [sighs] We've been over it like a million times, Twilight! We found all six keys, defeated Tirek, and got this sweet castle! End of story!

Twilight: Yes, but why?

Applejack: I dunno, sugarcube. Maybe it's just your new house and there ain't nothin' plus to it than that.

Rarity: I must say, speaking strictly on aesthetics, there really doesn't need to be plus to it. It's all simply divine!

Fluttershy: I agree with Twilight. And Rarity. And Applejack. And arc en ciel Dash. And Pinkie Pie. Oh, and probably Spike.

Spike:...
continue reading...
SEASON 3;

[shades closing]

[windows clattering]

Fluttershy: Fuzzy Legs, do toi think toi could secure those windows?

[webs shooting]

[windows close]

Fluttershy: And you'll alert me if anything scary comes close to the cottage?

[birds squawk]

Fluttershy: Oh, who am I kidding?... It's WHEN something scary comes close to the cottage! Please tell me my hiding place is ready.

Harry: [growls nicely]

Fluttershy: Oh, look, you've filled it with everything I need to survive this awful night. Thank you. Thank toi all! Now I don't have to step a hoof outside until this whole thing is over.

[bucket clattering]

Fluttershy:...
continue reading...
added by pinkbloom
added by MeiMisty
added by Gretulee
added by Gretulee
added by 3xZ
added by mina27
added by TimberHumphrey
video
posted by CullenProperty
1.    Guys don't actually look after good-looking girls. They prefer neat and presentable girls.
2. Guys l’amour flirts.
3. A guy can like toi for a minute, and then forget toi afterwards.
4. When a guy says he doesn't understand you, it simply means you're not thinking the way he is.
5. "Are toi doing something?" ou "Have toi eaten already?" are the first usual questions a guy asks on the phone just to get out from stammering.
6. Guys may be flirting around all jour but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.
7. When a guy really likes you,...
continue reading...
DEMENTED POEMS

roses are crap
Violets are shit
Sit on my face
And wiggle a bit

roses are stupid
Violets are silly
Grease up your flaps
Cuz here comes my willy

roses are awful
Violets are the pits
Lift up your shirt
And montrer me your tits

roses make me laugh
Violets make me titter
You're a dirty bitch
And toi l’amour it up the shitter

roses are straight
Violets are twisted
Bend over love
You're about to get fisted

roses are crap
Violets are wanky
Oooh I've just cum
Pass me a hanky

roses are red
It's elementary
Let's ring your best friend
And try double entry

roses are shit
Violets are crap
montrer me your clit
And I'll cum in your lap

roses are red
Skidmarks are brown
Give me a blow job
And avaler, hirondelle it down

roses are groovy
Violets are funky
I'm thinking of you
And spanking my monkey
posted by Bubblekat
1. Go around stores, pick up items and yell out really loudly "Who buys this CRAP anyway?!"

2. Get a cart, get on the bar below the bar toi grip, and push it down the isle, extra points for running into something ou someone

3. Go up to a aléatoire person and say "you have pretty eyes, may I have your eyes?!" and hear to see what they say

4. Laugh randomly

5. If someones talking on a cellphone Go closer to them and start maki aléatoire noises to disturb them, extra points if they hang up

6. If your near a fontaine run to it and start splashing in it

7. If your mom starts nagging to toi in public about the...
continue reading...
1. At the movies: When toi meet acquaintances/ friends.. .
Stupid Question:-
Hey, what are toi doing here?
Answer:-
Dont u know, I sell tickets in black over here..

2. In the bus: A heavy lady wearing pointed high-heeled shoes steps on your feet…
Stupid Question:-
Sorry, did that hurt?
Answer:-
No, not at all, I’m on local anesthesia.. …why don’t toi try again.

3. At a funeral: One of the teary-eyed people ask…
Stupid Question:-
Why, why him, of all people.
Answer:-
Why? Would it rather have been you?

4. At a restaurant: When toi ask the waiter
Stupid Question:-
Is ! the “Butter Paneer Masala”...
continue reading...
added by adultswimperson
Source: Google
I found this hilarious article on pcworld.com
Don't know who the auteur is, but he's funny.

1. Backward Thinking
"I sold my only car to help pay for gas money, but now gas has come down in price. How do I get my car back?"
I tried to contact this guy, but it turns out that he also sold his computer to help pay for his Internet connection.

2. It's trophée Lock--Capisce?
"HOW DO I TURN OFF CAPSLOCK? I ACCIDENTALLY TURNED IT ON YESTERDAY AND I DONT KNOW HOW TO TURN IT BACK OFF."
Note to self: Register howtoturnoffcapslock.com; make millions.

3. Credit Crunch
"I wanted to see if my computer would read my...
continue reading...