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Hello, and welcome to the Third jour of Christmassacre. And today, we got something extra special for toi all. We all know that Black Christmas was a great and subtle slasher film. And we all known nothing about Elves other than it’s bad and it’s hilarious because it’s awful. But, if we were to merge the two together, getting a slasher movie that has so bad, it’s good concepts and is a hilarious mess…. Silent Night, Deadly Night. Let’s get into this wonderful, wonderful mess.



So, this movie was released to the world in the good old an of 1984. Ronald Reagan was in office, cocaine was everywhere, and George Orwell wrote a book about that year. It was also a real good an for cinema… And then this movie came out. Parents hated this movie, saying that children should not have to see Santa killing people in theaters, because apparently parents can’t see R ratings. It’s like movement to dinosaurs. Parents vision is based on letters that don’t have an R in it. However, this huge amount of controversy only made this movie even plus popular. Angry parents just seemed to help annoncer this movie, and now Silent Night, Deadly Night is a cult classic among movie goers. So congratulations, all toi people who hated the movie despite never watching it. Instead of getting the film removed, toi ended up having it brought back for the entire world to enjoy. It must be all toi ever wanted. This movie even tries to pass itself off as being as good as Nightmare on Elm Street, Halloween, and Friday the 13th…. It’s not



Okay, enough with that. Let’s talk about the actual movie. The movie takes place on Christmas… obviously. Billy, a young boy at the beginning of the film, watches along with his brother as a man dressed as Santa murders his parents (With a gun, so this is probably the first time a slasher movie had a killer use a gun) in front of them… And not the kids. Because what’s the worst that witnesses could do to him. I’m just saying, if you’re going to commit murder to a happy family, go all the way. Anyway, years later, after growing up in an orphanage, Billy, now an adult, dresses in a Santa costume and starts going around, murdering people who he deems naughty. From that point on, it’s just your typical slasher movie. The only difference is that it’s Christmas. Young couples have a bit of fun, screw around, get drunk and have sex, and then Billy comes in with his axe and kills them. It’s what you’d expect from a movie such as this. It’s nothing spectacular, but nothing terrible either. That’s for the sequel.



This movie is just so simple when it comes to slasher movies. Just because it takes place on Christmas, it doesn’t mean it’s got a lot of new ideas. A serial killer Santa can only stay fresh for so long. While this movie isn’t exactly the most well told story ever, it does manage to have some interesting scenes. These kills that Billy commits could pass as special kills if he ever ends up as the suivant DLC character for Mortal Kombat X (Oh, I hope). Impaling people with arrows, strangling someone to death with Christmas lights. And who can forget the classic kill where Billy decapitates a teenager with an axe as he passes par on a sled. However, Billy’s ultimate goal is to murder Mother Superior, the cruel head of the orphanage. Why are all orphanages run par awful people? But, at the end of the movie (Spoilers), Billy is shot down in front of the orphans (Because that won’t fuck them up in a few years), and at the end of the movie, Billy’s brother, Ricky, tells Mother Superior that she has been naughty, and the movie ends. Is that a good ending, no. But it at least gives a reason for the sequel (Which I will be reviewing. That one is a real treat).



Silent Night, Deadly Night is far from a good Christmas slasher movie… ou a movie in general. Critics weren’t exactly fond of this movie, even saying that it was made on blood money and that the entire filming crew should be ashamed. Is it that bad? No. It’s bad. It’s REALLY bad. But it’ wasn’t that bad. Then again, this is the same guy who likes Killer Klowns from Outer Space, so I’m not exactly Roger Ebert. But, for some reason, it must have been good enough to get a cult following, and not one, not two, but four sequels. Yes, four! And even a remake in 2012. I’ve never watched the remake and I’ve never heard anyone talk about it, but the cover has Santa with a flamethrower on it, so it must be the greatest movie ever. Silent Night, Deadly Night is a very, very, VERY simple slasher film. If you’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all, including this one. But, if toi really want a good laugh, ou just want to watch Santa decapitate a teenager while he goes down a colline on a sled (Oddly specific of you), then this is the movie for you. Take care.

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LOL! xD and now toi have 26 million subscribers Pewds!
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Bahahahaha! xD
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Sonic Kart sounds cool.
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sega
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Oh no. Not again!
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(A body lies in a small pool with blood coming out of it)
Cody: (Narrating) I never thought this sort of thing would happen to me

(2 Weeks Earlier)
Cody: (Watches Scarface) Wow… the 80s were fucked
Wind: I don’t know. Our generation isn’t any better. In fact, I think, besides the threat of nuclear war from the Russians, it’s a little worse.
Cody: Still though. All that because he sold cocaine
Wind: Well, it’s a dangerous business after all
Cody: I know… Maybe if he sold something like… cookies, it would have been better
Wind: And probably fucking retarded
Cody: I’m just saying. Things...
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I'm not removing my mask
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posted by windwakerguy43
~Facebook~

Man: Hi, friend
Wind: Uh… do I know you
Man: Of course toi do. We just met five secondes ago. Now were the best of friends
Wind: I literally have no idea who toi are
Man: Oh, you’re a funny guy. Like
Wind: What the hell was that
Man: I just liked your comment
Wind: But, all I did was say a sentence
Man: Like
Wind: Will toi stop that
Man: Like
Wind: Cut it out
Man: Like
Wind: WILL toi CUT IT THE F**K OUT
Man: Oh, man. Definitely Dislike

~Twitter~

Man: Hey, I just went to the store and bought some milk
Wind: Good for you
Man: Hey, I just opened the milk
Wind: Uh-huh
Man: Hey, I just drank the milk
Wind:...
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Enjoy two minutes of non crashing videos.
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Wind: I’m telling you, right now, Cody. There is no person who has ever lit themselves on feu and thought it was a good idea… Except protesters.
Cody: But those Youtube vidéos montrer people doing it all the time.
Wind: Those are just idiots who want to be popular
Miku: (Walks into class, quietly)
Wind: … Something’s not right
Cody: What do toi mean
Wind: Miku is usually a very loud and obnoxious individual, and now she’s completely quiet
Cody: Really? What should we do
Wind: Simple… Nothing. Now, about those idiots who set themselves for popularity

Wind: (Walking with Cody) No, snorting a...
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Source: erhedfggh
So I have a vague memory of this game. I remember seeing this game in a Game Informer magazine (Yeah, remember fucking gaming magazines) when I was in elementary school. Alongside games like Resident Evil Revelations, ou I think, I don’t remember the exact issue, I saw this game on the side and how the reviewer thought it was the most boring game imaginable. So I avoided it for years up until now… and who boy, gaming journalism may be a joke now, but that guy was totally right. The game as developed par Vectorcell, known best for Jésus Christ Superstar on the IOS. I feel like I’m gonna...
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All that glitters is gold.
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posted by windwakerguy43
Rick: (Wakes up from coma) Oh my god..... How long have I been out.....
(Some time before)
Rick: Okay guys, so we got this guy who is speeding..... So were going to shoot him in the head for that
Shane: Yeah, were gonna fuck him up
Criminal: (Stops car) No, stop, I'm just a business man
Rick: There he is, shoot him
Criminal: No, wait, I'll just take this out (Takes out gun) And I'll just toss it onto the ground (Throws gun on ground and shoot Rick)
Police: Quick, shoot him
Criminal: No, wait, it was an accident (Gets shot)
Shane: Rick... are toi okay
Rick: Oh, sure... I just have a bullet in my body....
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Source: DC Comics