Well, been getting some ideas on how this ends, and they're pretty funny. Here is the end to the three parts of this adventurous story!

Me: What IS that noise?

AJ: Ah don't hear nuthin'......

Me: Shhh! Sounds like a squeaky toy of some sort. Sounds like....

Lyra: HEY!! How ya doin?


Me: Gahhh!! LYRA!


AJ: What the buck are ya doin' here?

Lyra: It's arc en ciel Dash! She's lying on the ground, nobody knows what to do, and the princess is away on royal business! And Soarin' is on vacation for some reason!

Me: On my way! I'm not letting her go! AJ, stay and watch the house!

AJ: Got git 'em, Tiger!

Lyra: He's a pony...

AJ: SHUT UP!!

Me: (approaching arc en ciel Dash) It's ok, guys, she'll be fine!

I checked her heartbeat. Yep, she was still alive. I found out she was choking on something.

Me: I can't believe I'm gonna "kiss" her in front of everypony!

I pressed my lips against hers and brought air into her body, followed par chest presses. I picked her up and squeezed her.

Me: C'mon, Dash, breathe! Maybe a few plus thrusts...

Then arc en ciel coughs, spitting out a piece of cupcake.

Rainbow: toi saved me! toi are so cool! Thank you! *kisses me*

Me: *blushes* Just being a friend!

Pinkie: Hey, how about a picture of toi two? Dash and the poney who saved her life, Mark!

I was photographed with Dash doing a hoofbump. Pinkie ran to make copies-and everyone wanted my signature.

AJ: How'd it go?

Me: I'm a hero! And a celebrity-sort of!

Lyra: That's great!

Me: (eyeing Lyra) I...

Lyra *squees* (smiling) Bye! I gotta tell Bon Bon!

Me: Please don't!

*Doorbell rings*

AJ: AH GOT IT!!

Derpy: Mail for the hero! Is that him over there!?

Me: (doing perfect Steve Irwin impression) Crikey!!

I take off out the door, with Derpy chasing me. She was fond of heroes...

Me: If I hug you, will toi leave me alone?

Derpy: Um...Derp!

Me: Close enough.

We hug, and she goes home. I return tired and very annoyed.

AJ: Here's yer mail! That was some chase!

Me: (reading the mail) Some mares never learn....What!? Celestia wants to interview me about my heroic action? Now?

Later, a few hours after the somewhat personal interview....

Me: Oh my Celestia! All the mares and fillies in Ponyville were there! And they kept looking at me! Good thing she put up a magic barrier! Trixie almost got through though...

AJ: Even Trixie attended? Wow. What the foins, hay was up with them? Ever thought about staying here?

Me: Well, all my stuff from the real world is here, so yes. It's better here, where toi can be Friends with anyone!

So that ends the three-part story. Was that good? Maybe I'll come up with a "After 'Me in Ponyville' " segment!