1. Pilot
Serena: So, when's the party?
Blair: Saturday... and you're kinda not invited. Since, until 12 hours ago, we all thought toi were at boarding school. And Jenny used up all the invites.
Blair: We should get going, unless toi want us to wait for you. Looks like toi got a lot of yogurt left.
Blair: Great. So, my dad left her for another man. She Lost 15 pounds, got an eye lift. It's been good for her.
Serena: I l’amour you, B.
Blair: I l’amour you, too, S.
Blair: She better not montrer her face again.
Chuck: I'm actually hoping she will.
2. The Wild brunch, brunch du
Blair: I wonder if Nate remembered brunch. It would be so wrong to montrer up without my boyfriend, who I love. And who loves me.
Serena: I'm really trying to make an effort here. I thought everything was good between us.
Blair: It was. Before I found out toi had sex with my boyfriend.
Blair: toi know, I always knew toi were a whore. But I never knew toi were a liar.
Blair: If toi wanna be part of this world, Jenny, people will talk. Eventually. toi gotta decide if all this is worth it.
Blair: What are toi doing right now? How about me?
Blair: It wasn't a quickie. Sex is actually a big deal to some of us.
3. Poison Ivy
Blair: Funny, Brown doesn't offer a degree in slut.
Blair: My father left my mother for a 31-year-old model. A male model.
4. Bad News Blair
Blair: Why am I mad? toi mean, why aren't I furious?! I can't believe for one seconde I thought that it would be different this time.
Blair: What about this morning then? When toi glanced at the call sheet, did toi see my name on it? When I wasn't in hair and make-up, didn't that seem strange? When the dressing room only had your name on it, what, did toi think they just forgot?
Blair: Because toi take everything from me! Nate, my mom!
Serena: Blair!
Blair: toi can't even help it. It's who toi are. I just thought that maybe this time it would be different. I should have known I'd be wrong
Blair: Who dare interrupt the van Der Woodsen as she teaches?!
Blair: Sorry, the number toi dialed is no longer is service.
Serena: Stop it, who is it?
Blair: I'm doing toi a favor.
Dan: Look I can hear you. Can I just please talk to Serena?
Blair: Apparently toi can, cabbage patch
Blair: Maybe we should crash the shoot, anyway. See who they replaced me with. Make fun of that skinny b!tch.
Blair: toi haven't done this since I was little.
Eleanor: toi haven't been in lit par ten since toi were little
5. Dare Devil
Blair: I'm not a stop along the way. I'm a destination. And if toi refuse to come, I'm gonna need to find a replacement... girls, the waiting list?
Blair: That's nice, Little Humphrey. But, um, that's not how we play
Blair: Okay, I have a problem. I have a big problem! It starts with a capital RX.
Nurse: What drugs have toi been taking?
Blair: Caffiene, Nicotine, Cadimine, Disprine, LSD, Driazapam, Flurazepam. All the pams really, I don't discriminate.
Blair: Martini.
Jenny: Oh, no thanks, I don't like Vodka.
Blair: Well thats great, because this is gin, as it should be
6. The Handmaiden's Tale
Blair: After everything that's happened - or, hasn't happened - I wanna make it special.
Blair: All I wanted was for us to start over. And toi didn't even try.
Blair: Is that a bong, mother? I didn't take toi for a stoner.
7. Victor Victrola
Blair: I don't want to talk about it. I just want to escape. That's what this place is for, right?
Blair: Yeah, let's talk about that masked ball. Let's talk about how I was waiting for toi to find me so that we can finally be together, toi were confessing your feelings and s’embrasser Serena. I thought I was doing everything right.
Blair: Do toi l’amour me?... toi should deal with your father. He needs you. toi know what? I don't.
Blair: Game recognizes game, Little J. But toi have to montrer plus respect. This is the last time I'll help you. suivant time toi traverser, croix me, I won't be as forgiving.
Blair: So, I heard on Gossip Girl that toi were having sex with Dan out here...in streaming video.
Serena: Oh, God. Kati and Is filmed us?
Blair: Well, it's not very high school musical scandalous. And no, they haven't streamed it...yet. But, I heard it was aggressive.
Blair: Well, it does have franchise potential. Chuck Bass, I do believe that all your years of underage boozing and womanizing have finally paid off. Truly, I am proud.
8. Seventeen Candles
Blair: Thank you, Father. That was very good advice.... toi don't grant birthday wishes, do you?
Priest: I'm a priest, not a genie.
Blair: Well, the suivant time toi talk to Him, could toi ask Him to send my boyfriend back to me?
Blair: After being broken up with my boyfriend for exactly 20 minutes, I succumbed to inebriation, performed at a speakeasy, and surrendered my virtue to a self-absorbed ass. The only good news is that he's a total pig who'll act like it never happened, thank God.
Blair: Losing my virginity to Chuck Bass? None of my Friends will ever understand. I'm ready for my punishment. Whatever toi and God think is fair. Flogging, fasting, ou putting that thing with the teeth around my thigh like Silas.
Blair: Go away, Chuck! I've been donné orders, practically from God himself, to avoid you.
Blair: No one knows that Nate and I broke up, and it's going to stay that way until I can fix this. And I don't think you're best friend would still be toi best friend is he knew...
Blair: Well, erase the tape! Because as far as I'm concerned, it never happened.
Blair: You're officially uninvited.
Blair: Exactly my point. But even if she wasn't, when toi get a boyfriend, toi become the best friend and the best friend becomes the seconde best friend. That's just how it has to be, if it's ever going to work.
Blair: These papillons have got to be murdered.
9. Blair Waldorf Must Pie!
Blair: I don't know what I was thinking. I mean, sleeping with him once, maybe I could understand. But twice?
Blair: Oh, so Nate gets a free pass and I'm the slut?
Serena: Tell me toi didn't sleep with Chuck for revenge.
Blair: Well, it wasn't because I liked his natural musk. And, besides, nothing hurts plus than sleeping with the best friend. Right, S?
Blair: Your mom is freaking out, so my is freaking out.
Blair: If toi think about it, it makes total sense that your mom was a groupie. I mean, only a woman that had completely satisfied her sexual appetite in her youth would ever marry your stepdads.
10. Hi, Society
Blair: toi almost made a fool of me in front of the New York Times. Which proves my very point; toi can't be trusted. Nate is a gentleman; he would never cause a scene.
Blair: Well, I can't be on you, remember? toi don't want Nate to find out and I don't want anyone to. toi have to learn how to behave yourself first.
Blair: Nate, after what toi pulled on my birthday, the only thing we should be doing together is moving on.
11. Roman Holiday
Blair: I think toi like Dan a little too much. But I should let toi know, someone's watching. Merry Christmas!
Blair: Well, Roman, toi are in for a treat because, the Waldorf Christmas is like no other.
Blair: There's no room in your life for me anymore.
Blair: I don't know. A single entrain a mid-price restaurant? Three-quarters of a DVD box set? Maybe a pair of Wilfrid stockings?
Blair: I don't know, why don't toi buy him a or money for $49.99. He won't know the difference.
Blair: Chuck! toi are not answering my calls. To torture me, I am sure. But, please! For the l’amour of God, do not tell anybody about us. Okay? Please? Please.
Blair: Well, I'm sorry, mother. It's just not the same. I don't understand how that French renard a volé, étole my father and your husband, and always seems to come off like an innocent lamb.
Blair: Roman doesn't even know how to ice skate. Can't toi escort him out of the park on the way to your meeting? Maybe drop him off a nail salon...
Blair: Why don't toi just buy a new outfit for Cedric and call it a day?
12. School Lies
Blair: toi have no idea who you're dealing with.
Blair: I'll just tell him your lying. And toi do toi think he'll believe? toi who bangs anything in his field of vision. ou me, his pure and honest girlfriend of many years.
Blair: Enough with the blackmail, aren't toi bored already? I can't avoid Nate forever.
Blair: Isn't there someone else toi can torture?
Blair: I'm innocent. Well, except for a crime of passion. I did something stupid with someone and even worse than doing that stupid thing I did the same stupid thing with someone else and pretended I'd never done that stupid thing before. toi look confused... should I walk toi through it?
Blair: toi are so naive. Michael Moore over there is obviously just using this film to get close to Dan.
13. A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate
Blair: I'm not pregnant. I command myself to not be pregnant.
Blair: I'm very stressed. And with toi and Serena down my throat I can hardly see straight, never mind keep nourriture down.
Blair: Maybe I am a total bitch. Ever think about that?
Blair: I'm not pregnant. So goodbye mistake, so far in my past I can hardly remember it.
Blair: If toi go with them, I'll ruin you.
14. The Blair chienne Project
Blair: Lady Godiva, my only friend.
Blair: But your hair looks disgusting. Did toi even douche today?
Blair: riz Krispie treats?
Blair: Brooklyn... I think that's in New York.
15. Desperately Seeking Serena
Blair: And have toi seen Nelly Yuki's extracurriculars? I should kick her well-rounded ass.
Serena: Why do toi keep saying her name?
Blair: Because it's Nelly Yuki!
Blair: Ew gross! Incoming, Chuck.
16. All About My Brother
Blair: All that matters to someone like Jenny right now are the 4 Gs, Guys, Girlfriends and Gossip Girl.
Blair: Right know Gossip Girl's credibility is like Tinsley Mortimer's after a few martinis.
Blair: It's your brotherly duty to keep her from becoming the suivant Katie Holmes.
Blair: What are toi talking about? You're starting to scare me. Hey, hey, hey. We're sisters. You're my family. What is you, is me. There's nothing toi could ever say to make me let go. I l’amour you. What is it?
Blair: My, my. If it isn't Little J, risen from the ashes?
Blair: I tried to warn you. There's a price to pay. I always knew a girl like toi couldn't afford it.
17. Woman On the Verge
Blair: We've seen toi with vomit in your hair, making out with investment bankers in the men's room at PJ Clark's. toi don't have to hide anything from us.
Blair: Yeah, I had sex with him in the back of a limo.
Blair: toi can tell us anything. We don't judge. We're the non-judging Breakfast club. We're your best friends. Anything toi do is something we did too.
Blair: Uh, I'm a big fan of lincoln Hawk?
18. Much I Do About Nothing
Blair: How? It's not like toi every do anything athletic.
Chuck: Well, that's not entirely true, now is it?
Blair: Fine, nothing that involves removing your scarf.
Blair: Break a leg.
Chuck: I think I just did.
Blair: Ugh! They say when toi hate something, toi should slam the door in its face.
Blair: Haven't toi heard? I'm the crazy chienne around here.
Blair: Don't worry, I can be a chienne enough for both of us.
Blair: Oh, you're not alone Georgina. I'm here now. And I brought some people who really really want to see you. I think toi remember your parents.
Blair: Chuck basse, bass is a romantic, who knew?
Chuck: toi don't belong to Nate. Never have, never will.
Blair: toi never belong to anyone.
Blair: No one ever enjoys their first time.
*********************
Sorry, that it's so long, but Blair has a lot of awsome lines :]
Serena: So, when's the party?
Blair: Saturday... and you're kinda not invited. Since, until 12 hours ago, we all thought toi were at boarding school. And Jenny used up all the invites.
Blair: We should get going, unless toi want us to wait for you. Looks like toi got a lot of yogurt left.
Blair: Great. So, my dad left her for another man. She Lost 15 pounds, got an eye lift. It's been good for her.
Serena: I l’amour you, B.
Blair: I l’amour you, too, S.
Blair: She better not montrer her face again.
Chuck: I'm actually hoping she will.
2. The Wild brunch, brunch du
Blair: I wonder if Nate remembered brunch. It would be so wrong to montrer up without my boyfriend, who I love. And who loves me.
Serena: I'm really trying to make an effort here. I thought everything was good between us.
Blair: It was. Before I found out toi had sex with my boyfriend.
Blair: toi know, I always knew toi were a whore. But I never knew toi were a liar.
Blair: If toi wanna be part of this world, Jenny, people will talk. Eventually. toi gotta decide if all this is worth it.
Blair: What are toi doing right now? How about me?
Blair: It wasn't a quickie. Sex is actually a big deal to some of us.
3. Poison Ivy
Blair: Funny, Brown doesn't offer a degree in slut.
Blair: My father left my mother for a 31-year-old model. A male model.
4. Bad News Blair
Blair: Why am I mad? toi mean, why aren't I furious?! I can't believe for one seconde I thought that it would be different this time.
Blair: What about this morning then? When toi glanced at the call sheet, did toi see my name on it? When I wasn't in hair and make-up, didn't that seem strange? When the dressing room only had your name on it, what, did toi think they just forgot?
Blair: Because toi take everything from me! Nate, my mom!
Serena: Blair!
Blair: toi can't even help it. It's who toi are. I just thought that maybe this time it would be different. I should have known I'd be wrong
Blair: Who dare interrupt the van Der Woodsen as she teaches?!
Blair: Sorry, the number toi dialed is no longer is service.
Serena: Stop it, who is it?
Blair: I'm doing toi a favor.
Dan: Look I can hear you. Can I just please talk to Serena?
Blair: Apparently toi can, cabbage patch
Blair: Maybe we should crash the shoot, anyway. See who they replaced me with. Make fun of that skinny b!tch.
Blair: toi haven't done this since I was little.
Eleanor: toi haven't been in lit par ten since toi were little
5. Dare Devil
Blair: I'm not a stop along the way. I'm a destination. And if toi refuse to come, I'm gonna need to find a replacement... girls, the waiting list?
Blair: That's nice, Little Humphrey. But, um, that's not how we play
Blair: Okay, I have a problem. I have a big problem! It starts with a capital RX.
Nurse: What drugs have toi been taking?
Blair: Caffiene, Nicotine, Cadimine, Disprine, LSD, Driazapam, Flurazepam. All the pams really, I don't discriminate.
Blair: Martini.
Jenny: Oh, no thanks, I don't like Vodka.
Blair: Well thats great, because this is gin, as it should be
6. The Handmaiden's Tale
Blair: After everything that's happened - or, hasn't happened - I wanna make it special.
Blair: All I wanted was for us to start over. And toi didn't even try.
Blair: Is that a bong, mother? I didn't take toi for a stoner.
7. Victor Victrola
Blair: I don't want to talk about it. I just want to escape. That's what this place is for, right?
Blair: Yeah, let's talk about that masked ball. Let's talk about how I was waiting for toi to find me so that we can finally be together, toi were confessing your feelings and s’embrasser Serena. I thought I was doing everything right.
Blair: Do toi l’amour me?... toi should deal with your father. He needs you. toi know what? I don't.
Blair: Game recognizes game, Little J. But toi have to montrer plus respect. This is the last time I'll help you. suivant time toi traverser, croix me, I won't be as forgiving.
Blair: So, I heard on Gossip Girl that toi were having sex with Dan out here...in streaming video.
Serena: Oh, God. Kati and Is filmed us?
Blair: Well, it's not very high school musical scandalous. And no, they haven't streamed it...yet. But, I heard it was aggressive.
Blair: Well, it does have franchise potential. Chuck Bass, I do believe that all your years of underage boozing and womanizing have finally paid off. Truly, I am proud.
8. Seventeen Candles
Blair: Thank you, Father. That was very good advice.... toi don't grant birthday wishes, do you?
Priest: I'm a priest, not a genie.
Blair: Well, the suivant time toi talk to Him, could toi ask Him to send my boyfriend back to me?
Blair: After being broken up with my boyfriend for exactly 20 minutes, I succumbed to inebriation, performed at a speakeasy, and surrendered my virtue to a self-absorbed ass. The only good news is that he's a total pig who'll act like it never happened, thank God.
Blair: Losing my virginity to Chuck Bass? None of my Friends will ever understand. I'm ready for my punishment. Whatever toi and God think is fair. Flogging, fasting, ou putting that thing with the teeth around my thigh like Silas.
Blair: Go away, Chuck! I've been donné orders, practically from God himself, to avoid you.
Blair: No one knows that Nate and I broke up, and it's going to stay that way until I can fix this. And I don't think you're best friend would still be toi best friend is he knew...
Blair: Well, erase the tape! Because as far as I'm concerned, it never happened.
Blair: You're officially uninvited.
Blair: Exactly my point. But even if she wasn't, when toi get a boyfriend, toi become the best friend and the best friend becomes the seconde best friend. That's just how it has to be, if it's ever going to work.
Blair: These papillons have got to be murdered.
9. Blair Waldorf Must Pie!
Blair: I don't know what I was thinking. I mean, sleeping with him once, maybe I could understand. But twice?
Blair: Oh, so Nate gets a free pass and I'm the slut?
Serena: Tell me toi didn't sleep with Chuck for revenge.
Blair: Well, it wasn't because I liked his natural musk. And, besides, nothing hurts plus than sleeping with the best friend. Right, S?
Blair: Your mom is freaking out, so my is freaking out.
Blair: If toi think about it, it makes total sense that your mom was a groupie. I mean, only a woman that had completely satisfied her sexual appetite in her youth would ever marry your stepdads.
10. Hi, Society
Blair: toi almost made a fool of me in front of the New York Times. Which proves my very point; toi can't be trusted. Nate is a gentleman; he would never cause a scene.
Blair: Well, I can't be on you, remember? toi don't want Nate to find out and I don't want anyone to. toi have to learn how to behave yourself first.
Blair: Nate, after what toi pulled on my birthday, the only thing we should be doing together is moving on.
11. Roman Holiday
Blair: I think toi like Dan a little too much. But I should let toi know, someone's watching. Merry Christmas!
Blair: Well, Roman, toi are in for a treat because, the Waldorf Christmas is like no other.
Blair: There's no room in your life for me anymore.
Blair: I don't know. A single entrain a mid-price restaurant? Three-quarters of a DVD box set? Maybe a pair of Wilfrid stockings?
Blair: I don't know, why don't toi buy him a or money for $49.99. He won't know the difference.
Blair: Chuck! toi are not answering my calls. To torture me, I am sure. But, please! For the l’amour of God, do not tell anybody about us. Okay? Please? Please.
Blair: Well, I'm sorry, mother. It's just not the same. I don't understand how that French renard a volé, étole my father and your husband, and always seems to come off like an innocent lamb.
Blair: Roman doesn't even know how to ice skate. Can't toi escort him out of the park on the way to your meeting? Maybe drop him off a nail salon...
Blair: Why don't toi just buy a new outfit for Cedric and call it a day?
12. School Lies
Blair: toi have no idea who you're dealing with.
Blair: I'll just tell him your lying. And toi do toi think he'll believe? toi who bangs anything in his field of vision. ou me, his pure and honest girlfriend of many years.
Blair: Enough with the blackmail, aren't toi bored already? I can't avoid Nate forever.
Blair: Isn't there someone else toi can torture?
Blair: I'm innocent. Well, except for a crime of passion. I did something stupid with someone and even worse than doing that stupid thing I did the same stupid thing with someone else and pretended I'd never done that stupid thing before. toi look confused... should I walk toi through it?
Blair: toi are so naive. Michael Moore over there is obviously just using this film to get close to Dan.
13. A Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate
Blair: I'm not pregnant. I command myself to not be pregnant.
Blair: I'm very stressed. And with toi and Serena down my throat I can hardly see straight, never mind keep nourriture down.
Blair: Maybe I am a total bitch. Ever think about that?
Blair: I'm not pregnant. So goodbye mistake, so far in my past I can hardly remember it.
Blair: If toi go with them, I'll ruin you.
14. The Blair chienne Project
Blair: Lady Godiva, my only friend.
Blair: But your hair looks disgusting. Did toi even douche today?
Blair: riz Krispie treats?
Blair: Brooklyn... I think that's in New York.
15. Desperately Seeking Serena
Blair: And have toi seen Nelly Yuki's extracurriculars? I should kick her well-rounded ass.
Serena: Why do toi keep saying her name?
Blair: Because it's Nelly Yuki!
Blair: Ew gross! Incoming, Chuck.
16. All About My Brother
Blair: All that matters to someone like Jenny right now are the 4 Gs, Guys, Girlfriends and Gossip Girl.
Blair: Right know Gossip Girl's credibility is like Tinsley Mortimer's after a few martinis.
Blair: It's your brotherly duty to keep her from becoming the suivant Katie Holmes.
Blair: What are toi talking about? You're starting to scare me. Hey, hey, hey. We're sisters. You're my family. What is you, is me. There's nothing toi could ever say to make me let go. I l’amour you. What is it?
Blair: My, my. If it isn't Little J, risen from the ashes?
Blair: I tried to warn you. There's a price to pay. I always knew a girl like toi couldn't afford it.
17. Woman On the Verge
Blair: We've seen toi with vomit in your hair, making out with investment bankers in the men's room at PJ Clark's. toi don't have to hide anything from us.
Blair: Yeah, I had sex with him in the back of a limo.
Blair: toi can tell us anything. We don't judge. We're the non-judging Breakfast club. We're your best friends. Anything toi do is something we did too.
Blair: Uh, I'm a big fan of lincoln Hawk?
18. Much I Do About Nothing
Blair: How? It's not like toi every do anything athletic.
Chuck: Well, that's not entirely true, now is it?
Blair: Fine, nothing that involves removing your scarf.
Blair: Break a leg.
Chuck: I think I just did.
Blair: Ugh! They say when toi hate something, toi should slam the door in its face.
Blair: Haven't toi heard? I'm the crazy chienne around here.
Blair: Don't worry, I can be a chienne enough for both of us.
Blair: Oh, you're not alone Georgina. I'm here now. And I brought some people who really really want to see you. I think toi remember your parents.
Blair: Chuck basse, bass is a romantic, who knew?
Chuck: toi don't belong to Nate. Never have, never will.
Blair: toi never belong to anyone.
Blair: No one ever enjoys their first time.
*********************
Sorry, that it's so long, but Blair has a lot of awsome lines :]