Kisame and Itachi waved goodbye to the rest of Akatsuki as they headed out for vacation. Kisame seemed to be sulking. “Why did toi volunteer us to stay behind to guard the base. We’re going to miss out.” Itachi looked up at him. “We will have a great time when our dates get here. I used my genjutsu to make sure your rendez-vous amoureux, date thinks you’re a wealthy maillot de bain model rather than a sadistic poisson man.” Kisame smiled at that idea. “Besides something tells me they’ll be back very soon.” Pein continued to read the map as the rest of Akatsuki followed from behind. “We are almost at the hotel for are first Akatsuki vacation.” Tobi began to dance around the group with joy. “Yay! Tobi loves vacations.” They finally stopped and Pein looked up from his map to see the dilapidated building. Hidan became enraged. “What kind of s*** hole do toi have us staying at?” Pein looked over at Kakuzu. “I gave toi ten percent of the budget so toi could get us a nice hotel.” Kakuzu folded his arms. “I did toi one better. I got a nice hotel and saved toi money.” A man came walking out of the hotel. “My name is Utaka. Welcome to the Lagoon Paradise.” Deidara walked closer to one of the rooms and noticed the rot on the door. “Looks plus like a swamp purgatory then a lagoon paradise un.” Everyone began to get settled in their rooms. Pein and Konan got into their room first. Pein wrapped his arms around Konan. “We are finally alone.” They started to Kiss when suddenly a loud crash of thunder startled them and rain began to pour onto their heads. They quickly stepped out of the way of the rain. “Wow that hole in the ceiling is big.” Konan began ringing her paper arm out as Pein left to yell at Utaka about the ceiling. Konan rolled her eyes. “Well isn’t this romantic.” Meanwhile Tobi was jumping up and down on the lit suivant to Deidara’s. “Stop jumping on the lit Tobi un. You’re going to break it.” “Tobi is too excited Senpai! ”Suddenly Tobi jumped to high and busted through the ceiling of their room, and into the floor of Zetsu’s room. “Hello Zetsu. How are you?” Zetsu grabbed some rope and began to walk out the door. “Just going to go catch my dinner.” Zetsu looked over at Tobi stuck in the floor of his room with concern. “Do toi need help?” Deidara shouted to Zetsu from below. “Let him stay for a little while un. At least we know he can’t go cause trouble un.” Zetsu shrugged and walked out. In the lobby Kakuzu was giving Utaka his money as Pein walked in. “What’s with the hole in my room’s ceiling?” Utaka smiled. “You must mean your shower. It’s the way we cut down on the water bill around here.” Kakuzu smiled under his mask. “That’s a good idea.” Pein glared at Kakuzu. “Don’t even think of doing that at the base.” Kakuzu shook his head in disapproval. “You’re a shinobi. toi ‘re expected to survive in harsher conditions then that.” Kakuzu walked back to his room as Pein argued with Utaka. He entered his room to see that bugs were crawling all over his bed. He rushed back to Utaka and Pein. “Why the hell are bugs in my bed?” “That is our special unorthodox massage bed. They rub up on and bite your skin to relax toi while toi lay there.” Pein smiled and mocked Kakuzu. “Kakuzu you’re a shinobi. You’re expected to survive in harsher conditions than that.” Meanwhile a woman was walking down the street, unknowingly about to get her foot caught in Zetsu’s rope trap. Suddenly Hidan jumped out of the bushes with his scythe ready to kill her when he triggered the rope trap. She walked away unaffected as Zetsu and Hidan fought. “She was my dinner!” “She was Jashin’s sacrifice toi f****** plant.” Hidan attempted to slice Zetsu in two, but he quickly divisé, split his body into black and white Zetsu. The black and white Zetsu pressed their hands against the ground and several roots sprouted from the ground to attack Hidan. Hidan quickly diced them to pieces. “Katsu!” Suddenly several explosions went off breaking up Zetsu and Hidan’s fight. “Pein wants everyone to meet up back at the hotel un.” They all gathered in the lobby. Pein spoke to the Akatsuki. “To put it simply. This place sucks so we are heading back to the base.” Kakuzu walked over to Pein. “I managed to get him to give us our money back. Turns out he is ‘all heart’.” Kakuzu revealed a new cœur, coeur in his threads. They all walked the long trail back to the base to find Itachi along the way, walking his rendez-vous amoureux, date home. “How was the vacation? I see it was rather brief.” They all just stared bitterly at Itachi. “Well whatever. Try not to bother Kisame when toi get back. He and his rendez-vous amoureux, date are going to have a very exhausting night.” As Itachi and his rendez-vous amoureux, date continued on past the group he turned around and looked at the other Akatsuki members. “By the way. Where is Tobi?” Tobi continued to struggle to get loose from the seconde floor. “Is anyone there? Tobi is starting to get cramps.”