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Okay, so originally, I was going to review The Leprechaun instead, but the reason why it changed was because I was able to watch Halloween in a movie theatre, where it showed the original film in high quality. I know I already reviewed Halloween, but that was years ago. Also, be honest with yourself, do toi really want to see a review of the fucking Leprechaun, movie? The most interesting thing about it is that Leprechaun 2 has the most in-depth Wikipedia plot I have ever seen for a movie and it’s for Leprechaun 2. So yeah, let’s talk about 1978’s Halloween



In Illinois, 1963, a young boy par the name of Michael Myers kills his sister and is put into a psychiatric ward. Fast vers l'avant, vers l’avant to 1978, and Michael has escaped from his asylum and is prowling the streets of Haddonfield, Illinois, stalking the young teens, one in particular being Laurie Strode, played par Jamie Lee Curtis in her first role of the populaire franchise. Now Dr. Loomis, Michael’s psychiatrist, must find him before he starts his killing spree. Nowadays, a film about a mentally unstable slasher is pretty common, but in 1978, where such a thing was never like this before. Mix that with the incredible camera work and the subtle use of seeing Michael Myers in the background also helped to give the movie a very uncanny feeling.
If Scream was the film that brought the slasher films into the mainstream in the modern age, then Halloween was the grandfather that set the rules and brought about the famous tropes that we know about the slasher genre today. And yet, despite it all, there is very little gore in this movie. Half of the characters are killed off par means that don’t draw blood. toi may see a stream of blood coming from wound, but no dismemberment, no decapitations, none of that. Sure, compared to other slasher genres with a bigger budget, this may seem lame in comparison, but the movie makes up for it for it’s build up. Each moment, when the famous musique of the film plays, your just looking around the screen, wondering where Michael Myers is looming about, be it from in a station wagon ou be it from behind clothes hanging to dry. And that lovely score is always there to remind toi of that. But it’s best toi mostly focus on that. If toi try to listen to character conversations in the background while it is montrer Michael on the move, it will sound like they are stalling just for white noise.
Being a John Carpenter film, a man who I think is an amazing member of the horror film industry, toi can see some of his touches in the film. The characters in the movie even watch The Thing from Another World, which is a film that John Carpenter has remade with his 1982 classic, The Thing. But let’s talk about Michael himself, this films Freddy ou Jason. Seen as one of the greatest of slasher movie villains, Michael is dead silent, wears a mask to hide his identity, and is pretty indestructible. He can survive getting stabbed and shot six times and falling off a seconde story balcony and still survive. Eventually, the sequel, Halloween 2, killed him off, and started with Halloween 3: Season of the Witch, in order to start a new series, as it was planned to be a series of different horror stories. But the public demanded plus Michael and here we are now, a ton of shit movies, two bad remakes, and a new sequel that redcons everything but the first movie, which I guess is something good, but not much.
Halloween is a real classic in the slasher genre. It may not have the violence for gore hounds, but the suspense, the build up, and the pay off are all so well timed that it makes this one of the best films out there. I’m sure if toi want, toi can catch it on TV around October. They play it all the time. It’s like A Christmas Story but for October. They always play it. Give the movie a try. It’s worth it
Oh look, its Jeff the Killer. Jeff the Killer. Jeff the motherfucking Killer. Yeah, well fuc toi toi overrated prick. toi suck.
Incase no one noticed, I fucking hate the Jeff the Killer story. I do. I really do. And why. Well, its a fucking disaster, that's why. It is poorly written, and there was no effort put into it at all. Lets start with that Jeff's brother gets arrested for defending himself. And the court instantly finds him guilty. What kind of fucking trial is that. The court system in Phoenix Wright are better then this fucking place.
Also, when Jeff gets set on fire, I'd like to point...
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???: get in the car Dex

Dex: *gets in car* this is what the hell toi do!

???: yep *starts driving*

Dex: I almost got killed 3 times!

*BANG BANG BANG BANG*

Both: holy shi*!

Dex: make that 4 times!

???: hold on!

*ERRRCH*

Dex: why the hell did toi bring me along!?

???: toi figured out!

Dex: that does not mean that toi have to bring me with you!

???: in the films people usually want to tag
along!

Dex: why would toi think I would want to tag along on a dangerous mission!?

???: I thought it would be a quick diplomat thing!

Dex: there are 10 guys chasing after us in sport cars!

???: WELCOME TO MY WORLD!
Court Lobby

Swift: Dear lord, that was too close
Lilly: Don't worry. It could have been worse
Swift: Worse?! I don't have much evidence and were bringing in a witness who saw toi commit the crime. If I can't get any actual proof, were going to lose this case
Lilly: Don't worry. I know toi can do it
Swift: !! W-what
Lilly: Here, I have this
Swift: What's this? A letter... I would like to see toi tonight. I only want toi to help me bring back the good old days. Please don't refuse. Come to my house at 10:00 on April 1st. Come alone. Signed... MARIAH
Lilly: Yeah, I was a little surprised too
Swift: Why...
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Steel Ball Run is a dit par many to be the greatest Jojo part in all of the Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure series. And I agree. It is definitely my most favori part. It has some of the best story-telling of any of the parts, some great interactions between Johnny and Gyro, one of the most understandable villains in the entire series, some of the best Jojo side characters, and, of course, the topic of today’s article, some of the best Stands in the series. Are they all good, sadly no, but thankfully, the good definitely outweighs the bad when it comes to Stands of the Steel Ball Run universe....
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Hello, everyone, and today on this article of Jojo-nuary, we will be ranking my own liste of all of the Jojo’s. All eight of them. Now, before I start this off, I want to say right now that I enjoy all of the Jojo’s. Even the bad ones that toi probably don’t like. They are all great in their own ways and they are all as wonderful as the last. So, today, I am going to rank the eight Jojo’s from my least favori to my most favorite. Some of them may be different. Some of toi may have a different Jojo that toi see as your favorite, ou maybe toi may not like a Jojo as much as I do. Just...
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Hello, everyone. Now, Halloween is only a few days away…. Like, ten weeks away… Well, I want to get an early start, so, for all of you, I am going to make ten different haut, retour au début tens for the suivant following Saturdays. And what better way than to start with the haut, retour au début ten demons. Now, demons are the little red creatures that toi find lurking the in the depths of hell, ou in some part of the media. Now, first some rules. Only one demon per franchise, and only from what I have seen, ou played. Also, I am including ANYTHING! Be it movies, games, TV shows, whatever. It’s so that way, I can make these...
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video
the
musique
comedy
………… This isn’t what it looks like, I swear……… Okay, so maybe it is what it looks like, but trust me, this is in fact a horror game. Let me repeat that. This is, in fact, a horror game, a psychological horror game, that screws with toi emotionally and mentally, and tricks toi par being something else… So does that mean I can review Doki Doki Literature Club without making myself look less anti-social.



…… Let me repeat myself, this is a horror game. Also, THIS ENTIRE article IS A SPOILER FOR DOKI DOKI LITERATURE CLUB! DO NOT READ THIS article IF toi PLAN ON READING...
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(Link to the first episode will be in the commentaires section for those who haven't seen it yet.)

(Hey there! Jared Potts here with the suivant exciting episode of my new récent hit fan-fiction series, Network 999! Seeing as how the support for the last episode was pretty incredible, I decided to make the suivant one a bit early. :D I hope toi enjoy the suivant episode of Network 999!)

Quick Story Recap: It is the an 2087, and technology nowadays is extremely advanced.

The Internet (called Network 999) is also even plus powerful than ever. toi see, ever since a group of scientists produced an update to...
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Guys, I am not making this up, this is probably the darkest one par far. Sure, it may not be so bad when we get to later stories, but trust me, par far, this is my darkest one. So, back when I was like nine, and I was still living in a suburban neighborhood. And let me tell you, this neighborhood is like one of those late 70’s sitcoms. I mean, this place was so caucasian, that I felt like I was in a winter wonderland. But anyway, we went to this one park called Hueston Woods back when we all actually gave a shit about going outside (Yeah, imagine that. Kids actually used to go outside). Anyway,...
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Link: Man, this job is a lot plus fun than I thought (Kills monster) I mean, when do I get to help someone par killing someone (Kills another monster) It’s very rare I get to help out someone and actually have fun doing it (Kills another monster) Okay, I think I finally have enough of these things hearts…. But, I’m in no rush (Continues to kill monsters, then, hears music) What is that? Is it an angel. I got to find it (Hears musique behind waterfall) What is this. The musique is coming from behind this waterfall (Climbs through waterfall, leading to an empty cave) Oh, a secret cave. Good...
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(Some readers may find this disturbing)

So, what do toi get when toi get sex, rape, and poor writing..... well, pretty much most of the shit I reviewed, but what if it was a Creepypasta.... Okay, without involving My Little Pony........ toi get Dirty Movie.
Now, lets start off with saying the main character is a porn director.... Hate this story already. Anyway, he retires, because I don't know. This couple comes to him, because I don't know, and they ask him to help with their sex life, because I don't know, and the porn director comes out of retirement to help them......... Because I don't...
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................... What the fuck.............. Seriously......... What the fuck................... What is this abomination of a fanfic................ just what the fuck is this disaster..................... Well, one things for sure, it's known only as Shrek is Love, Shrek is Life.
Now, first off, Warning, this is not something toi want to see. Unless toi are okay with its awfulness, turn back now. Anyway, this fanfic is, THANKFULLY, short. But, there is so much a fanfic can do in just twenty seconds. Trust me, this fanfic does it. And it is horrible. Anyway, it starts with a nine-year-old..........
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Narrator: Long ago, in the kingdom of Hyrule, there lived lots of farmers and only one horse. Suddenly, a giant black guy came and set houses on fire. All hope was lost, until a boy dressed in girls clothes came and defeated the giant black man. The possibly homosexual boy was known as the Hero of Time. The land was in peace for years, until the black guy came back, for some reason, and set stuff on feu again. People hoped the hero would return, but he never did and everyone realized he was just a fucking poser. What happened to the land of Hyrule. None remain who know....... Wait, then how...
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posted by windwakerguy43
Wind: (Walks over to the Empress) So, yeah, when I went to those other towns to find the cure for the plague…. They tried to lynch me, but since they were worried they’d get the plague from touching me, they then started shooting at me with rifles. I had arrows and firebombs thrown at me. I think I breathed in enough bomb ash that it’s fucking up my lungs as we speak.
Empress: Oh, this is terrible
Wind: You’re damn right it’s terrible. I’m the only one in this damn city with an attention span lasting plus than five seconds, so if I die, we’ve all pretty much Lost the only person...
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Link: I swear to god, this is a bunch of bullshit. We have met two people, and got shitty rewards.
Tetra: Well, we still got one plus person on this island to talk to. Mesa
Link: Mesa. toi mean the lazy bum
Tetra: Well, I'm sure he has a good quest for us
(Later, at Mesa's house)
Mesa: Cut my grass
Link: ........ Really. Cut the grass. I swear, I am doing chores for lazy as shit people.
Mesa: toi want your reward ou not
Link: Well, fine (Walks out and cuts the grass)
Tetra: Well, sure, things may be boring, but, at least we're getting a reward
Link: Really? What? Ten dollars for the Candy store
Tetra:...
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Nate: (Driving through city with Emma and Chris) I can't believe we have to go and get money for a couple of punks
Emma: At least we'll be safe
Chris: Yeah. I just want to find a place where we can eat. God, I'm starving
Nate: Christ, please, just, stay quiet
Chris: Fine, I'll just keep quiet and starve to death
Nate: Good. Do that (Keeps driving, until he comes to bank, only to see a large truck in front of it) What the- (Nate gets out of car) Guys, stay here. I'll be right back (Walks into bank to see robbers trying to brake into the safe, par setting explosives on it)
Robber 1: Come on, man. We...
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Tingle: Oh, hello aga-
Link: GIVE ME THE FUCKING MAP
Tinge: Well, lets see (Counts bag of rupees) Well, it seems to be about right. Here is your map
Link: GREAT! HOW MUCH MAPS DO I NEED LEFT
Tingle: Hmm...... About four
Link: THANK toi (Leaves)
King of Red Lions: So, where is the suivant Triforce shard
Link: ON SOME STUPID ISLAND
King of Red Lions: Then let us be off
Link: GOOD IDEA
King of Red Lions: ......Um...... Why are toi still yelling. You've been doing that ever since we left the Wind Temple
Link: I TOLD YOU! I'M REALLY FUCKING PISSED
King of Red Lions: Oh right
TO BE CONTINUED