don't kill me

1.The 'poke' button on Facebook is awesome...
But I think there should be a 'stab' button...

2.was riding a horse yesterday and fell off. I almost got killed! THANK GOODNESS
the Walmart greeter saw what happened and came over and unplugged it.

3. anyone who says "nothing is impossible" has obviously never
tried to staple jello to a tree.

4.Text someone and tell them "Hey, I Lost my phone, can toi call it?"
and see how many people call it

5. 3 bottles of bleach: $15.00. One rope, 3 rolls of duct tape,
and a shovel: $35.00. 3 boxes of trash bags: $10.00. The look on the cashier's face: Priceless!...

50 Fun things to do in a Grocery Store

1. Ask the produce manager if he happens to have any fresh Oompah Loompah fruit.

2. While holding a cantaloupe directly in front of your chest, squeeze it and smile dreamily.

3. Every time toi turn the corner with your shopping cart, shout “Wheeeeeeeeeeeee!”

4. Go up to the manager and tell him ou her that you’ve Lost your mommy.

5. While waiting in line at the checkout, juggle some lemons.

6. Tiptoe stealthily up and down the aisles – and around corners – with a magnifying glass.

7. While scratching frantically, ask the manager if he ou she has anything...

1.    Unplug the refrigerator.
2.    Turn the four on.
3.    Rearrange the furniture. (Turn a bedroom into a dining room, and vice versa.)
4.    Hide the remote.
5.    Hide the television.
6.    Hide the pets.
7.    Change the answering machine message.
8.    Turn off the answering machine.
9.    Change the speed dial numbers.
10.    Change the alarm clock time to twelve hours earlier.
11.    Add...

NOTE: These "facts" have not necessarily been verified. They are just for fun.

1.If toi keep a goldfish in a dark room, it will eventually turn white.

2.San Francisco cable cars are the only National Monuments that move.

3.Topless saleswomen are legal in Liverpool, England, but only in tropical poisson stores.

4.A Wisconsin chariot élévateur, chariot élévateur à fourche operator for a Miller bière distributor was fired when a picture was published in a newspaper montrer him drinking a Bud Light.

5.More people study English in China than speak it in the United States of America (300 million).

6.For every person on earth, there are an estimated...

72 things Guys should know about Girls <3...


1. Stay on the phone with her even if shes not saying anything.

2. When she's mad hug her tight and don't let go.

3. When she says she's ok dont believe it, talk with her.

4. Call her at 12:00am on her birthday to tell her toi l’amour her.

5. Call her before toi sleep and after toi wake up

6. Treat her like she's all that matters to you.

7. Tease her and let her tease toi back.

8. Stay up all night with her when she's sick.

9. Watch her favori movie with her ou her favori montrer even if toi think its stupid.

10. Give her the world.

11. Let her wear your clothes....

1. Guys may be flirting around all jour but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

2. When a guy really likes you, he'll disregard all your bad characteristics.

3. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

4. Guys will do anything just to get the girl's attention.

5. toi have to tell a guy what toi really want before he gets the message clearly.

6. Guys l’amour their moms ou grandmas.

7. A guy often thinks about the girl who likes him. But this doesn't mean that the guy likes her.

8. toi can never understand him unless toi listen to him.

9. Beware. Guys can make gossips...

Please note that these are all my opinion so some of these may perhaps not be to everyone's tastes but there we are. Also these aren't in any particular order - it would take forever to put them all in an order lol. I won't bore toi with too much écriture - surely you're just after the pictures right? :) Oh and lastly for the actors I've only put my favourite film/tv montrer that they've been in - it's not that I'm being ignorant about their other work

1.
Name: Kris Lemche (Actor)
From: Final Destination 3
Character: Ian McKinley
Attraction: His gothy style in this film - haven't seen him in anything...

This above all, to thine own self be true.
- William Shakespeare



The words of truth are always paradoxical.
- Lao Tzu

He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened.
- Lao Tzu

The wise man does not lay up his own treasures.
The plus he gives to others, the plus he has for his own.
- Lao Tzu

Nothing is softer ou plus flexible than water, yet nothing can resist it.
- Lao Tzu

Silence is a source of great strength.
- Lao Tzu

Life is without meaning.
You bring the meaning to it.
The meaning of life is whatever toi ascribe it to be.
Being alive is the meaning.
- Joseph Campbell

The cave you...

FHM Magazine released a liste a few years back of the 50 worst t.v. characters of all time. I think it mostly pertains to sitcoms. So what do toi all think? Agree? Disagree? Think they are missing people ou that any of these people shouldn't be on the list?

50. Ross Gellar - Friends
49. Wilbur Post - Mister Ed
48. Janet Wood - Three's Company
47. Dwayne Wayne - A Different World
46. Jimmy Glick - Primetime Glick
45. The Professor - Gilligan's Island
44. Gomer Pyle - Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.
43. Paul Shaffer - Late montrer With David Letterman
42. Edna Garrett - The Facts of Life
41. Jessie Spano - Saved par The...

not par me n thnx for readinnnnnnnnnn........♥♥

ll around us, everyday, there are two groups of people that many believe to be different. Not so! Teen-agers and Seniors have a lot in common. If it's accidentally putting their shoe on the wrong foot ou putting their foot in their mouth, there are instances of conduct that are very similar in both groups.

For example:

Both groups like to hang out at fast nourriture restaurants and shopping malls.

Both groups have developed their own "walk."

Both groups like to wear clothing that doesn't fit well.

Both groups seem to have questionable facial hair.

Both...

Stand on haut, retour au début of the high board and say toi won't come down until your demands are met.
Tell the lifeguards that they aren't doing their jobs because toi have seen at least 15 people drown today.
Ask people if they have seen your pet shark.
Sit in the baby pool and play with the toys.
Take a flutter board and pretend toi can't swim.
Hit strangers with your flutter board.
Ask an attractive lifeguard to practice CPR on you.
Sit in front of a water jet, make moaning sounds and say, "Oh yeah... oooh that feels soooo good....".
Sit on the haut, retour au début of the water slide and don't move.
Swim near a stranger and say,...

I found this one on the internet:

Why did the chicken traverser, croix the road?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for change! The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he was a maverick chicken, and he wanted to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

SARAH PALIN: The chicken had to traverser, croix the road because he was not able to find a bridge. Alaskans do not build bridges to nowhere. If he wanted a bridge, he'd have to build it himself.

JOE BIDEN: The chicken crossed the road because...

1. Flick pencil erasers at the teacher then deny it
2. Say "I'm annoying u! I'm annoying u! I'm annoying u!.." keep doing it and see the teachers reaction
3. Pass notes in class, and when they tell u to stop say "we were sharing notes"
4. During Suisse/tests when everything is quiet say "Why is it so quiet in here?"
5. During tests when your done, turn in your chair if someone else is done, start whispering across the room to them
6. When your in the hallways push people and yell "PUSH AND SHOVE!!"
7. During tests/quizes turn to someone who's finished and mimic them
8. Steal peoples supplies then...

Found this on Google. Hope it makes ya laugh.

1. Set all the alarm clocks to go off in 10-minute intervals

2. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, “Code 3 in housewares,…”and see what happens.

3. Go to the Service bureau and ask to put a bag of M&M’s on lay away.

4. Find one of the workers who is making a pyramid ou a display of something and as soon as they are finished with it, ask for the thing that’s on the bottom and have a panic attack until they give it to you.

5. Get on the loud speaker and declare a “Going Out of Business Sale, All Items 99% Off”

6....

A week il y a I made an article of my 20 favori animated heroines so I thought I'd make an article for my 10 least favori animated heroines. I'm not going sugar code it, I'm going to be brutally honest because I really hate all these girls. Just so there's no confusion I wanna let toi know that that number 10 is the one I hate the least and number one is the one I hate the most. Please leave a commentaire on what toi think about this, enjoy.

10.Lady(Lady and The Tramp)

I know she's considered one of the most loved Disney heroines and the most loved of all the animal heroine but I really hate...