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added by LifelessPenguin
Source: Alienated
added by Bluepenguin
Source: Kanga Management Clip
added by Colonelpenguin
Source: Maw
added by Jhoman12
added by Blue_Vanilla
Source: me (the screenshot actually ^^;)
added by fun123fun
posted by peacebaby7
Author’s Note: I’ve already done a set of ten skits for just POM in general, but these are, as the titre says, purely Skilene. Most just imply Skilene, but there a few at the end in which Skipper and Marlene are an actual couple. link are the skits for normal POM skits if toi wish to read them. Any titre with a Roman numeral suivant to it has a skit note associated with it displayed at the end. I hope toi enjoy these skits and I hope I succeed in making toi laugh. Peace, out.

11) Sweet Dreams

    On a quiet Saturday afternoon, Skipper had sent his men off for a snowcone reward...
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Snackatarium: Take 1

X: This hiding l’espace is not so sweet! >:) *moves salty sweet snacks out of the way to reveal Marlene*

Marlene: Sweet? Really? That's the joke you-I mean, AAAHHH! *jumps away from X's grab*

X: *finds Marlene behind sodas* This spot is fizzed out! >:)

Marlene: Better, but-AAAHHH! *jumps away from X*

X: *kicks over trash can* And that one was-Where is she?

Marlene: I'm not getting in that filthy trash can! >:/

Director: *sigh* I told toi before, it's just props. It's not real garbage!

Marlene: ...Fine...

Snackatarium: Take 2

X: *finds Marlene behind sodas* This spot is fizzed...
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Everybody attacked, but he managed to slip out.
The others continued, not knowing they we're beating each other up

Outside:

Kowalski: I gotta hide! I gotta hide! Huh! Burt's habitat!

Burt: What are toi doing here, Maurice? Shouldn't toi be pampering your king?

Kowalski: It me! Kowalski!

Burt looks confused.

Kowalski: I'll explain later, but don't let the other know I'm here!

Skipper: Oh, Kowalski?

Kowalski jumps behind a pile of hay.

Skipper: Burt, do toi know where Kowalski is?

Burt: Sure! He's right there!(Points to Maurice in Kowalski's body)

Skipper: No! We swapped bodies. That's Maurice!

Burt: Oh!...
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posted by RTE33
(Warning: All of These Are Not True and Just For Entertainment Purposes.)


Skipper Used To Be The Self Respecting, Dim-Witted King, and Julien Used To Be The Commando Guy. A Freak Accident Switched Their Minds.


Mort Used To Think Dan Schneider Delivered Presents Around The World on Christmas, Until He Came In Touch With The King's Feet.


Private Thinks My Little poney and Lunicorns Are Made par Hasbro, Even Though Lunicorns are Made par Mattel.


Marlene Is a secret Pegaster.


Kowalski's Smart phone Is From Verizon but He's So Hexy That Verizon Doesn't Give Him Bills.


When Skipper Gets Stung, He Never Feels It.


When Mort Watches Spongebob, He Jumps At The TV Trying To Eat The Characters, With Little Success.


Watch Penguins Of Madagascar! ou Not, Rico Gets Paid Either Way.


THE END!
Defeating the Lobsters: Take 1

*penguins begin battling the lobsters*

Group of Lobsters: *jump on Skipper & Kowalski* "Lobster pile!"

Blowhole/Julien: *turn around, begin strolling to the control panel & stop abruptly*
...
Director: *looks at cameramen* *sigh* "Do toi see what I have to work with here? Where's Mort?
*reaches for cell phone--* "And where's my cell phone?! *sees Mort in far corner*

Mort: *playing with Director's cell phone* "You can be my friend! And toi can be my friend! Oh! And toi can be my friend, too!"

Director: "Do I even want to know how he got that?"

Defeating the Lobsters:...
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Skipper Is The King: Take 1

Julien: "I bet Skipper isn't doing nearly a bang up job at being me, as I am at being him!"

Director: *talking into walkie talkie to the camera men* "Cut to maki, lémurien habitat..."

Skipper: ...

Director: "Wait a minute?! Where's Skipper?!

Maurice: *points down the side of the main rock of the habitat* "Uh...I think I found him."

*cameramen cut to where Maurice is pointing*

Marlene: "Ya know Skipper, that crown makes toi look manly." <3

Skipper: "Maybe we can go somewhere a little more...comfortable..." *starts kissing*

Director: "Stop!!! You! Stop the cameras!! Maurice! Stop...
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Kissing Scene: Take 1

Kowalski: "No...hard...feelings?"

Hen: "You've meddled with mental powers toi can't begin to comprehend, Kowalski! My wrath will be fierce! But par golly toi are one salsy dancer!"

*Hen begins s’embrasser Kowalski*

Hen: "Blech! What have toi been eating?!?!"

Kowalski: "Fish. I'm a penguin. Do the math."

Kissing Scene: Take 2

Kowalski: "No...hard...feelings?"

Hen: "You've meddled with mental powers toi can't begin to comprehend, Kowalski! My wrath will be fierce! But par golly toi are one salsy dancer!"

*Hen walks toward Kowalski*

Kowalski: "WAIT! Do we really have to have this scene?"...
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I'm écriture this so toi can find out wich manchot, pingouin toi are most like. It is a multiple answer quiz. Good luck!


What is your favori way to talk?

A. In one syllable words.
B. With a voice that makes toi sound dominant.
C. Using big words that others don't understand.
D. With a phony accent.
E. Who cares!

What is your favori subject in school?

A. Gym
B. History
C. Science and Math
D. Art
E. I like them all!

What is your hobby?

A. Playing with dolls.
B. Collecting little thimbles.
C. Doing science experiments.
D. Watching T.V.
E. I don't have a hobby.

What are you?

A. Only child.
B. Oldest child.
C. Middle child....
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Some of the characters from POM are in a group therapy room and I'm the therapist.
Me: Glad to see everyone here. Who'd like to begin?
P: Well, i'd like to say that I've stopped hanging around with Mort and I haven't touched a cacahuète, arachide beurre winky since June 3rd. (the others clap)
Me: 3 weeks sober. Impressive. How does it feel?
P: Well, there has been constant RINGING IN MY EARS and it feels as though my body is devouring itself from the inside! (getting ready to slap himself in the face)
K: Be strong, young Private. I know what it's like to be addictive to enjoyment.
KJ: (muttering) Psychotic scientist....
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posted by andresandru
100 years ago....

"get him!" a corbeau, corneille showted, as manny badgers and animaux ran against Mr. Linert and his macareux, macareux moine friend, Mr. Swarget.

They ran, carrying the most precious objects of that moment, they were in Russia, runnig in a cliff, the two birds knew that place like the palm of their hand, no one, except their friends, knew about the hundreds of tunels they had.

"come!" Swarget shouted, they slided and hit a secret tunel, they started running through it.

"you remember I'm claustrofobic right?" Linert said, making his way through the tube, hearing manny sounds, he looked back and he saw one of...
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Later that night, Private snuck out once again. Private knew it would be risky with the other wolf, but he had to see Skipper.

Private was about to leave the H.Q. when Kowalski noticed it and grasped Private's flipper.
K: "Where do toi think you're going?"
P: "Um, to see Skipper..."
K: "Private, how many times do I have to tell toi that Skipper's gone. You're going to get yourself killed if toi go out there!"
Tears drizzled down Kowalski's cheeks.
P: "If toi don't believe me. I'll proove it to you! Come with me!"
K: "Come on, Rico!"
They waddled out to the park at the area that divided the park from...
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The prologue to this is actually called the ultimate fanfiction, ou something like that, but I've changed it's titre becuase I saw other fanfictions and I didn't want to offend anyone par sugesting my stories are superier- which they probably are now. Anyway, here's chapter 1.

Ch.1 clues

I stayed with the three remaining penguins that night. Skipper had decided we would chercher for clues the suivant morning, with our minds cleared from sleep. Sleep was exactly what I couldn't do though. With my morphing into a penguin, and Kowalski's dissapearance, who knew what would happen next.

I woke up the next...
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 Jake The loutre (Credit to Creator of Picture)
Jake The Otter (Credit to Creator of Picture)
One jour in the zoo, the penguins were in the lair, watching a movie.
"Skipper, why are we watching this again?" Private asked.
"It's a manchot, pingouin documentary. Just like last time. But a bit less gory...." Skipper answered.
"Oh penguins, we are in need of you're asisstance." a dit a familiar chimp voice.
"What's up, chimps?" Skipper said.
"It seems that there is a temporary transfer to the Central Park Zoo with another Otter." explained Mason, while Phil used sign language.
"So, why do toi need our help?" Asked Kowalski.
"Don't toi remember what happened last time? With Ronda?" reminded Mason.
"Right.......
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 Teardrops On My Guitar...
Teardrops On My Guitar...
Marlene and Skipper were BFFs, until that Kitka came along. When Skipper dates Kitka, Marlene remembers her times with him. Marlene sings 'Teardrops On My Guitar', in her version!

Marlene:
Skipper Looks at Me, I Fake a Smile so he Won't See.
That I Want and I'm Needing Everything that we Should be.
I'll Bet she's (Kitka) Beautiful, that Girl he Talks about.
And she's got Everything that I have to Live Without.

Skipper talks to me, I Laugh 'cause it's so Damn Funny!
And I can't even See Anyone when he's with Me
He says he's so in Love, he's finally got it right!
I Wonder if he Knows he's all I Think...
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