Yes, it's that magical time of an again when the Darwin Awards are bestowed, honoring the least evolved among us.
Here is the glorious winner:
1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to feu at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long plage , California , would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
And now, the honorable mentions:
2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland Lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a
little shopping around, soumis a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also Lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an heure to clear a l’espace for his car during a blizzard in
Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20
mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free>ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an
oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change.
When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the
counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer.... $15.
[If someone points a gun at toi and gives toi money, is a crime committed?]
7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some bière pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window.
The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas.
The whole event was caught on videotape.
8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her bourse, sac à main and ran.
The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, 'Yes, officer, that's her.
That's the lady I a volé, étole the bourse, sac à main from.'
9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti Michigan, at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he a dit he couldn't open the cash register without a nourriture order. When the man ordered oignon rings, the clerk a dit they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]
10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor accueil parked on a Seattle
street, he got much plus than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up suivant to a motor accueil near spilled sewage. A police spokesman a dit that the man admitted to trying
to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank par mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with your Friends and family...
unless of course one of these individuals par chance is a distant relative ou long-lost friend. In that case, be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost.
*** Remember... They walk among us!!! ***
[absolutley no surprise that the majority of these retards are/were American!!]
Here is the glorious winner:
1. When his 38-caliber revolver failed to feu at his intended victim during a hold-up in Long plage , California , would-be robber James Elliot did something that can only inspire wonder. He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
And now, the honorable mentions:
2. The chef at a hotel in Switzerland Lost a finger in a meat-cutting machine and, after a
little shopping around, soumis a claim to his insurance company. The company expecting negligence sent out one of its men to have a look for himself. He tried the machine and he also Lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
3. A man who shoveled snow for an heure to clear a l’espace for his car during a blizzard in
Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had taken the space. Understandably, he shot her.
4. After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driver found that the 20
mental patients he was supposed to be transporting from Harare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, the driver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a free>ride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital, telling the staff that the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies. The deception wasn't discovered for 3 days.
5. An American teenager was in the hospital recovering from serious head wounds received from an
oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
6. A man walked into a Louisiana Circle-K, put a $20 bill on the counter, and asked for change.
When the clerk opened the cash drawer, the man pulled a gun and asked for all the cash in the register, which the clerk promptly provided. The man took the cash from the clerk and fled, leaving the $20 bill on the
counter. The total amount of cash he got from the drawer.... $15.
[If someone points a gun at toi and gives toi money, is a crime committed?]
7. Seems an Arkansas guy wanted some bière pretty badly. He decided that he'd just throw a cinder block through a liquor store window, grab some booze, and run. So he lifted the cinder block and heaved it over his head at the window.
The cinder block bounced back and hit the would-be thief on the head, knocking him unconscious. The liquor store window was made of Plexiglas.
The whole event was caught on videotape.
8. As a female shopper exited a New York convenience store, a man grabbed her bourse, sac à main and ran.
The clerk called 911 immediately, and the woman was able to give them a detailed description of the snatcher. Within minutes, the police apprehended the snatcher. They put him in the car and drove back to the store. The thief was then taken out of the car and told to stand there for a positive ID. To which he replied, 'Yes, officer, that's her.
That's the lady I a volé, étole the bourse, sac à main from.'
9. The Ann Arbor News crime column reported that a man walked into a Burger King in Ypsilanti Michigan, at 5 A.M., flashed a gun, and demanded cash. The clerk turned him down because he a dit he couldn't open the cash register without a nourriture order. When the man ordered oignon rings, the clerk a dit they weren't available for breakfast. The man, frustrated, walked away.
[*A 5-STAR STUPIDITY AWARD WINNER]
10. When a man attempted to siphon gasoline from a motor accueil parked on a Seattle
street, he got much plus than he bargained for. Police arrived at the scene to find a very sick man curled up suivant to a motor accueil near spilled sewage. A police spokesman a dit that the man admitted to trying
to steal gasoline and plugged his siphon hose into the motor home's sewage tank par mistake. The owner of the vehicle declined to press charges saying that it was the best laugh he'd ever had.
In the interest of bettering mankind, please share these with your Friends and family...
unless of course one of these individuals par chance is a distant relative ou long-lost friend. In that case, be glad they are distant and hope they remain lost.
*** Remember... They walk among us!!! ***
[absolutley no surprise that the majority of these retards are/were American!!]
one jour i went hollywood and saw taylor lautner, made out and my friend got jelous tryed to make out with robbert pattison and told her to f-of she got angry and kicked him were the sun dont shine. me and taylor were going out then she tryed to crash thios party were in din't work and got arested and we brock her out. she went round my back and made out with taylor, i kicked HER were the sun don't shine she cryed in pain she got a gun tryed to kill me i called the cops she killed them so i used my awsome looks against her and stabed her in the eye she got pissed and killed taylor so i killed her mom. foung her in the bin s’embrasser a rat who was biting her lip she got rabies and died. i got married to robbert and had three kids called bella, edward and jacob and lived happyliy ever after.
