Snape's Family and Friends Club
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Dear Honored Headmaster and Professor Snape,
    Hallo! Thank toi so much for all your help to our three kids. Sure, James Sirius can be a little rowdy, but toi always look to his potential and never gave up… only one plus semester to go until summer! I’ll bet you’ll be sad to see him go!
    I wrote this letter to invite toi to the Burrow for a Christmas dinner. Of course all the Weasleys will be there—since they’ve been homeschooled, toi don’t get to see them much, do you?
    …who am I kidding?
    Listen....
continue reading...
posted by ProfSnape
I believe the time has come that we need to set up some ground rules. Because I know most of toi have the attention span of rodents, I'll make this short:

1) No nudity. I don't care if they cropped it our so no one can see any of the "stuff." It's a step too close to porn, which I don't appreciate.

2) No cursing. To be plus relaxed, mild curse words are alright, but I'd rather them be cut off completely. As a general rule, if they bleep a word out on Comedy Central, it's too much to say here.

3) Don't be rude to others. We need to be polite to everyone and... WAIT, I'M DISCIPLING ALL OF YOU. I'm not being MEAN. Being your professor, I belive I can use any sort of punishment I need to get my point across, got that? Good.

That's all. toi may be excused. Except all of toi that talked during this article. You'll stay behind for detention during the Quidditch match...
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