Lucas - Brooke, I..."
Brooke - "We have a naked me in the hot tub."
[BROOKE looks back over at HALEY as NATHAN nods at her]
BROOKE: Did toi see that?
PEYTON: What?
BROOKE: Nathan just gave her the nod.
PEYTON: What nod?
BROOKE: The "lets hook up after the game" nod. [Pause] Wanna know what I think? I think Nathan likes tutor girl. But I think tutor girl likes Lucas. And I know I like Lucas. And I don't know who the hell toi like anymore. This is all turning into one big love… rectangle plus one, whatever that is.
Brooke - "Jake toi can tell me. I won't even remember it in the morning."
Jake - "You really wanna know?" leaning closer to Brooke's ear. "The truth would kill your buzz."
Brooke:What's your idea of your perfect date?
Haley:You getting hit par a bus.
Brooke:Nathan's lucky with that sense of humor.
Lucas: Look Haley, can I tell toi something?
Brooke(literally bouncing into the room): salut boyfriend. salut Tutor girl.
Haley: salut Tigger
Brooke (talking about Lucas): He's so serious, I thought I'd lighten him up a little
Karen: And toi couldn't take him to a comdey?
Brooke: I guess you're not a big fan of tatoos then.
Karen: No, not on my son.
Brooke: I think I could light my self on feu and my mother wouldn't notice, so sometimes it's hard for me to remember some moms would.
Brooke:(while watching Lucas' letter burn)I hope it wasn't money.
BROOKE: (v.o) Someone once said; it's the good girls who keep diaries. The bad girls never have the time. Me… I just wanna live a life I'm gonna remember. Even if I don't write it down
Brooke: why do bad guys lie to get into your bed, and good guys lie to get into youre heart
Brooke: Yes. "Vote Brooke for president." It gets straight to the point and short enough for even the stoners to remember.
Brooke: I haven't stuffed since I started puberty.
BROOKE: How many moments in your life can toi point to and say, "That's when it all changed"? toi just had one. Don't worry, baby. The popularity thing's not so bad.
PEYTON: The Brooke Davis Leopard Bra? Dude, that thing's like a welcome mat. Anyway, I heard toi were naked in his car.
BROOKE: No, I was partially naked. At one point I had mittens on 'cause it was cold.
HALEY: toi know, I’m just not clear on this. So the douche at your house is broken and toi had to have Felix come all the way over here and use mine?
ANNA: Um…
BROOKE: Uh-huh.
PEYTON: Brooke!
HALEY: Wait a second. Y-you don’t have a lit do you? Did you… tell me toi didn’t have sex in my bed. Brooke.
BROOKE: I’m already washing your sheets.
HALEY: Oh my god! Ugh! Brooke! Ugh!
BROOKE: They already yelled at me, what is the big deal?!
HALEY: The big deal is that first of all; toi did not thank me for helping toi with the CDs. seconde of all; toi had sex IN MY BED! And third; toi ate all the brownies.
ANNA: Actually, I had a couple.
HALEY: That’s not the point.
BROOKE: Haley’s right. The point is that I’ve been deceptive. It’s not so much that I lied to anyone’s face. It’s plus about what I didn’t say.
HALEY: Ugh! OK. There is a big difference between a lie and a little white lie.
BROOKE: Really!
HALEY: Yeah!
PEYTON: OK, wait, what white lie?
HALEY: Nothing!
BROOKE: Haley lied to Nathan!!
HALEY: Not exactly!
BROOKE: Yes toi did!
PEYTON: About what?!
HALEY: Nothing.
PEYTON: Haley.
HALEY: toi know what, if we’re talking about bad behaviour, toi might wanna sit this one out!
PEYTON: What is that supposed to mean?
HALEY: That’s supposed to mean that Peyton’s the one toi should be looking at, not me.
BROOKE: Why?! She not the one jouer la comédie like a perfect little Stepford wife!
HALEY: Uh!
ANNA: Why are toi picking on Haley? She’s throwing us a slumber party.
BROOKE: Actually, she was throwing us a slumber party, toi just butted in!
PEYTON: Brooke! LEAVE HER ALONE!
BROOKE: WHY!?
HALEY: What’re toi gonna do? Snort her?
HALEY: Listen, I didn’t throw this slumber party for you, toi threw it for yourself and toi know it!
BROOKE: Well, at least I didn’t lie to my husband about hanging out with Chris!
PEYTON: WOAH!!
HALEY: Brooke! Well… Peyton did cocaine with that Rick guy!
PEYTON: Haley!
BROOKE: WHAT!!
PEYTON: toi had sex in her bed!
ANNA: OK –
BROOKE: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!? CRACK ****!!
PEYTON: ****!
BROOKE: LIAR!!
(Haley rips Brooke’s nose strip off)
ANNA: Man… arbre Hill’s got some drama
Brooke (to Anna): Hi… I’m Brooke. We haven’t officially been introduced, but your dating my ex-boyfriend and I’m sleeping with your brother so it looks like we have a lot in common.
BROOKE: We should totally hang out more. What is your name?
HALEY: Haley…
BROOKE: Yeah. I don’t like that name. Lets call you… Brooke!
BROOKE: Hi friend!
PEYTON: Thanks.
HALEY: Sure. I’ll see toi guys later.
PEYTON: Where’s your ride?
HALEY: Oh. I’m going to take the last fan bus back.
PEYTON: It just left.
BROOKE: That’s perfect. Brookie can come with us!
HALEY: Yeah, she named me Brooke.
BROOKE: Peyton, can she come? Please? Peyton, please!
PEYTON: Just don’t touch the stereo. ou we’ll have a problem.
BROOKE: Road trip.
BROOKE: We’re going on a road trip. We’re going on a road trip.
[THE CAR driving along a road. BROOKE’S hitting PEYTON with her pompoms as PEYTON tries to drive]
PEYTON: Brooke! Come on…
[BROOKE throws the pompoms out the window, giggling and clapping. Then she leans over the front seat, looking at HALEY and then PEYTON]
BROOKE: Don’t toi two like the same guys? ou guy, ou something?
HALEY: I’m just tutoring him, that’s all.
PEYTON: So you’re not into him? Because he seems to be into you.
[BROOKE’S looking out the back window]
BROOKE: He gave her the nod!
PEYTON: Just be careful.
HALEY: Well, what about toi and Lucas?
PEYTON: What about us?
HALEY: Oh, come on. Tortured artist meets tortured athlete? Talk about your obvious attraction.
[The car beeps to signal lack of gas]
BROOKE: I hear birds.
PEYTON: Unbelievable! Brooke, did toi not think to put gas in the car?
[BROOKE looks at HALEY]
BROOKE: Answer the question, Brooke.
[The car stops]
BROOKE: Why are we stopping?
[BROOKE’S CAR. PEYTON gets out of the phone with her cell]
PEYTON: There’s still no signal. Who lives like this?
HALEY: Pop the trunk, will you?
BROOKE: Peyton, don’t listen to it. It might be a trick.
[PEYTON pops the tronc and HALEY looks inside]
HALEY: Yeah, it’s empty. I saw a gas station a few miles back. If I’m not back in an hour, tell my mom I loved her?
BROOKE: Don’t toi mean Nathan?
PEYTON: I’ll go with you.
BROOKE: What about me?
[BROOKE’S back in the car and PEYTON locks the doors. As BROOKE and HALEY walk away, BROOKE’S yelling]
BROOKE: I could suffocate in here. Guys!
HALEY: toi did crack a window, right?
BROOKE: Guys! Come on! I’m scared! Please! Come on, toi guys. Don’t go! Someone will come!
[PEYTON and HALEY walk off]
Shot of a bag in a glass display case. Brooke pops up from the other end looking sulky.)
BROOKE: But I want it so bad!
(Haley pulls her away and liens arms with her.)
HALEY: No. It’s not in the budget. Besides, if toi get the purse, then toi can’t afford the outfit for the opening.
BROOKE: Screw the opening. I’ll stay at accueil with the purse.
(Haley looks at Brooke worriedly, she seem to be dozing off.)
HALEY: What’s going on, toi alright?
BROOKE: Yeah, I just feel a little light headed.
HALEY: Why?
BROOKE: I…sold some stuff.
HALEY: What stuff?
BROOKE: Some…blood.
HALEY: Blood!? toi sold blood? Brooke, toi really think that’s a good idea? toi actually don’t look very well. Kinda… pasty.
BROOKE: I’m discount shopping! I’m gonna have to get used to looking like crap. And besides, I needed some extra money for the dress.
HALEY: Which is only thirty-six bucks.
BROOKE: Shoes.
HALEY: Eighteen dollars.
BROOKE: Eyeliner to go with the shoes.
HALEY: Seven fifty, which is what? Sixty-one fifty with tax. I mean please, toi have plenty left over for-
BROOKE: Alcohol! We’ll stop par the liquor store on the way home.
HALEY: I really don’t think toi should be drinking after toi just gave blood.
BROOKE: No! The woman told me to re-hydrate myself and besides, if I’m gonna be seen in these shoes, I’m gonna need a drink ou two.
Brooke: I thought I knew you. But I guess it’s easier to see what we want than to look for the truth. toi think toi know me, but toi don’t, and that means toi don’t know what I can do. toi see me as someone who is populaire and has all the answers. That’s not true. I may not always know what I am doing, but I’ll try to make things better. And when I make a mistake, because face it we all do, I promise I’ll ask for your help. I can’t do this alone, but if you’ll take a chance on me, we can do great things together. I promise if toi believe me I’ll find the courage to reach for your every dream. JFK a dit that courage of life is a magnificent mixture of triumph and tragedy, a man does what he must in spite of personal consequences, in spite of obstacles and dangers and pressures and that is the basis of all morality.
Brooke: Eww. toi two realize you’re related, right?
Nathan: Hi Brooke.
Brooke: Double eww if Tutor Wife is here.
Lucas: She’s not. What’s up?
Brooke: Umm, my car is now out of commission, thanks to my jealous spiteful stain of a neighbour, and I was sort of thinking that toi might want to walk to school together. Unless of course your waiting for your boy toy here.
(Haley and Nathan walk up)
Brooke: Oh, look. It’s our very own Britney Spears and… whoever she married this week. I have a question for toi guys. What do toi think, rose booties, ou blue?
Haley: Booties? Brooke, I’m not pregnant.
Brooke: No. The only way this isn’t totally screwed up is if your knocked up, but don’t worry. Your secret’s sûr, sans danger with me.
Tim: What’s this lame-ass joke about toi guys getting married?
Peyton: He’s in shock now that you’re officially off the market.
Brooke: It’s true Dim. Haley’s preggers.
Haley: Brooke!
Tim: Right. And Lucas moved away. toi guys gotta do better if your gonna get one over on the Tim.
Haley: The Tim. (laughs)
Brooke: Okay, for future reference, driving a convertible filled with inflated rubbers, not smart!
Lucas: Helium condoms?
Brooke: If she’s pregnant, it’s a reminder, if she’s not, it’s a reminder. It’s cute. salut Mouth, how’s your bod?
Mouth: Skinny.
Lucas: toi know Skillz and Fergie, right?
Brooke: Course I do. salut guys. Do toi know Peyton?
Skillz: What’s up, skinny girl?
Peyton: Hi.
Brooke: Peyton’s an 8.1 on LustFactor.
(Brooke takes a picture of Peyton’s chest)
Brooke: Soon to be a 9. toi know, I was thinking, we can take the cameras, put them out on the tables, people can take pictures for the wedding wall.
Lucas: Nice.
Brooke: Care to know what else I have planned, I know toi do! I have spray string, for when tutor girl and boy arrive, and Mouth, come here, sit.
(Brooke sits Mouth down in a spinning chair)
Peyton: What is that?
Brooke: This, missy blonde girl, is the Brooke Davis version of Spin the Bottle. Only this, is Spin the Body. (Brooke spins Mouth and it lands on Fergie) Okay, toi two have to make out! And last but not least, we have 5 minutes in the elevator.
Lucas: I thought it was 5 minutes in the closet.
Brooke: Yeah, if your in junior high. But the great part about this is, toi know how everybody has their elevator list?
Skillz: What?
Brooke: Your elevator list! Come on, the liste of people your allowed to have sex with if your ever stuck in an elevator with them!
Skillz: Halle Berry.
Fergie: Beyonce.
Peyton: Jack Black.
Mouth: Brooke Davis.
Brooke: Well, everybody makes a liste and if two people have each others names… five minutes in the elevator!
Lucas: Sounds like fun. Nice work Brooke.
Brooke: Thank you. Now all we need is a Nathan and a Haley.
(Brooke spins Mouth)
Mouth: (Pointing at Skillz) No. (Pointing at Brooke) Yes. (Pointing at Lucas) No. (Pointing at Peyton) Yes.
Brooke (to Felix after finding out he has a sister): toi mean after they had toi they rolled the dice and kept breeding? That’s risky.
Brooke: And to haut, retour au début it all off, if my parents go broke, I might actually have to study to get into college.
Peyton: My God, the horror!
Brooke: I know. How the mighty have fallen.
Brooke: Okay. Theresa, terrible posture. Pinch that penny. Bevin, toi need…a breath mint. Peyton. Nice form. And excellent betrayal of a best friend. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. toi guys! This weekend is the Classic. It’s our biggest cheer competition. Aren’t toi sick of Clair Young and ours Creek Warriors taking accueil the trophy every year? Because I am. We need to get it together here and I’m not just talking about our routine. I’m talking hair, nails…underarms, Theresa.
BEVIN: Brooke, cheerleading is supposed to be fun.
BROOKE: Yeah? Well winning’s funner. And if toi don’t like it toi can go cheer for the wrestling team. Take five.
PEYTON: Okay, toi know what? toi hate me, I get it. Fine. Just don’t take it out on our squad.
BROOKE: Everything is not about you, Peyton. Did toi ever think that maybe I’m being a psycho-hose-beast because I want us to do well this weekend? Those judges are not going to be as forgiving as I am.
PEYTON: Funny, I didn’t know toi were forgiving at all.
Brooke: Lucas Scott betrayal train, all aboard.
(Brooke takes a picture of Peyton in the douche for LustFactor)
Brooke: We are going to get toi a 10 yet!
(Haley walks in)
Haley: Hey, is Peyton around? She a dit she was gonna loan me something to wear.
Brooke: Yeah, she’ll be out in a second.
Haley: Oh my God! Where did toi get that picture of her?
Brooke: I got it off modern technology. It’s this free little project I’m doing to help expand her horizons.
Haley: par posting nude pictures of her on the Internet?
Brooke: Don’t worry, she’s gonna thank me once she sees the guys I’ve gotten lined up.
Haley (sees the picture of one): Oh, he’s cute. (sees another picture) Oh, really cute! (sees another picture) Oh, that’s what I’m talking about!
Brooke: Down girl. toi can look at the menu all toi want but from now on toi eat at home.
Brooke: Guess who's in the lobby, I'll tell you. Claire Young and her little ho posse. We are going down there.
Peyton: Okay. And if an angry dance-off breaks out I got your back.
Brooke: Great. Just don't stick another couteau in it.
BROOKE: I cannot believe the nerve of that little third rate Britney trying to pretend like she doesn’t recognize me.
PEYTON: Are toi still obsessing over this? toi made out with her boyfriend at camp.
BROOKE: I didn’t know they were dating, unlike some people. And besides he was a yell leader, he was gay anyway.
Brooke: It’s important to have somebody who can make toi laugh, somebody toi can trust, somebody that, toi know, turns toi on, and it’s really, really important that these 3 people don’t know each other!
