It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
***
Life is like an onion; toi peel off one layer at a time and sometimes toi weep.
plus funny Carl Sandburg quotes
***
Life is just a phase you're going through...you'll get over it.
plus funny Anonymous quotes
***
There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it.
plus funny Oscar Wilde quotes
***
Everything has been figured out, except how to live.
plus funny Jean-Paul Sartre quotes
***
An autobiography is the story of how a man thinks he lived.
plus funny Herbert Samuel quotes
***
The trouble with the rat race is that even if toi win you're still a rat.
plus funny Lilly Tomlin quotes
***
For most men life is a chercher for the proper manilla envelope in which to get themselves filed.
plus funny Clifton Fadiman quotes
***
Not a shred of evidence exists in favor of the idea that life is serious.
plus funny Brendan Gill quotes
***
Were it offered to my choice, I should have no objection to a repetition of the same life from its beginning, only asking the advantages authors have in a seconde edition to correct some faults in the first.
plus funny Benjamin Franklin quotes
***
No matter how bad things get, toi got to go on living, even if it kills you.
plus funny Sholom Aleichem quotes
***
There are good days and there are bad days, and this is one of them.
plus funny Lawrence Welk quotes
***
toi know, it's a long world.
plus funny Lawrence Welk quotes
***
The basic rule of human nature is that powerful people speak slowly and subservient people quickly -- because if they don't speak fast nobody will listen to them.
plus funny Michael Caine quotes
***
Life is like a game of poker: If toi don't put any in the pot, there won't be any to take out.
plus funny Moms Mabley quotes
***
It's possible, toi can never know, that the universe exists only for me. If so, it's sure going well for me, I must admit.
plus funny Bill Gates quotes
***
Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.
plus funny Will Rogers quotes
***
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
plus funny Mark Twain quotes
***
Born to be wild - live to outgrow it.
plus funny Lao Tzu quotes
***
Life is nothing but a competition to be the criminal rather than the victim
plus funny Bertrand Russell quotes
***
Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.
plus funny Truman Capote quotes
***
Life is not so bad if toi have plenty of luck, a good physique and not too much imagination.
plus funny Christopher Isherwood quotes
***
[I]nstead of holding on to the Biblical view that we are made in the image of God, we come to realize that we are made in the image of the monkey[.] - From The Importance of Living (1937)
plus funny Lin Yutang quotes
***
The cost of living's going up, and the chance of livin's going down.
plus funny Flip Wilson quotes
***
After one look at this planet any visitor from outer l’espace would say "I WANT TO SEE THE MANAGER."
plus funny Willliam S. Burroughs quotes
***
toi know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy, the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named 'Bush', 'Dick', and 'Colon'.
plus funny Chris Rock quotes
***
Life is like stepping onto a bateau which is about to sail out to sea and sink.
plus funny Shunryu Suzuki Roshi quotes
***
Nothing matters very much, and very few things matter at all.
plus funny Arthur Balfour quotes
***
All the world's a stage and most of us are desperately unrehearsed.
plus funny Sean O'Casey quotes
***
Life is so unlike theory.
plus funny Anthony Trollope quotes
***
Life is like eating artichokes, toi have got to go through so much to get so little.
plus funny Thomas Aloysius Dorgan quotes
***
There must be plus to life than having everything.
plus funny Maurice Sendak quotes
***
Life is painful, nasty and short... in my case it has only been painful and nasty.
plus funny Djuna Barnes quotes
***
Life is like a cobweb, not an organization chart.
plus funny Ross Perot quotes
***
Life is a horizontal fall.
plus funny Jean Cocteau quotes
***
In spite of the cost of living, it's still popular.
plus funny Kathleen Norris quotes
***
I came into this world black, naked and ugly. And no matter how much I accumulate here, it's a short journey. I will go out of this world black, naked and ugly. So I enjoy life.
plus funny Screamin' geai, jay Hawkins quotes
***
Life's plus amusing than we thought.
plus funny Andrew Lang quotes
***
A man should control his life. Mine is controlling me.
plus funny Rudolph Valentino quotes
***
In the game of life, it's a good idea to have a few early losses, which relieves toi of the pressure of trying to maintain an undefeated season.
plus funny Bill Vaughan quotes
***
Personally, I don't think there's intelligent life on other planets. Why should other planets be any different from this one?

***
Life is wasted on the living.

***
Life... is like a grapefruit. It's orange and squishy, and has a few pips in it, and some folks have half a one for breakfast.

***
Life is divided into the horrible and the miserable.

***
Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.

***
Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

***
Life is a zoo in a jungle.