1. Stuff one of those giant dodgeballs (the ones toi all used to play dodgeball at gym ou recess when it was legal) under your chemise and tell him your pregnant with his child.
2. While he's sleeping rub his bulge and watch him moan and squirm in his sleep. (Run when he wakes up!)
3. Come up behind him while he's talking to royalty at a royal banquet, cover his eyes and flirtily coo "guess who?"
4. Give the goblins meth and release them out into the goblin city.
5. Interfere with his dates/loves par locking them into several of the oubliettes in the labyrinth.
6. For guys only: ask to borrow...
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