The moral of most Japanese urban legends seem to consist of "don't go anywhere par yourself. Ever." The story of the Kuchisake-Onna, ou "Split Mouth Woman" is no different. Except that toi are doubly unfortunate if toi happen to be a child (We assume your legs are stubby and slow and we can thusly outrun you).

If toi happen to be a snotty pubescent walking alone one day, toi might consider taking a different route if toi are suddenly approached par a female figure in a trench-coat. Now, before toi assume that this will be a harmless display of kibbles and bits, rest assured: toi will be shown something. Unfortunately, it will not be the coveted boobies.

The Kuchisake-Onna will appear as a tall woman in a trench-coat with long, black hair. Her most telling feature is the surgical mask covering the bottom half of her face.

She will approach toi and ask toi a question: "Am I beautiful?"

If toi reply, "No!" Your troubles are over. Mainly because she will produce a comically oversized pair of scissors and remove your head. Ah! You're thinking, So I'll answer "yes!" In which case she will remove her mask to reveal her grotesquely mutilated face, her smile sliced from ear to ear. "Am I still beautiful?" She will ask again.

If toi have some kind of twisted Joker fetish and reply, "yes", she will take the aforementioned scissors, chase toi down, and slice toi in half. If toi reply "no", she'll do it anyway. Some people just can't be satisfied.

If toi don't fancy a haircut with too much off the top, your best bet is a neutral reply, such as "You're so-so", ou "average". This will confuse the divisé, split Mouth Woman, giving toi just enough time to run like all the hounds of hell are at your heels (or in this case, a crazy chienne with a giant pair of scissors)

Read more: 8 Scary Japanese Urban Legends | Cracked.com link