After going back to my Best and Worst Dark Souls bosses, I really wanted to try out this liste again. I didn't have many games with enough bosses before, but now I feel that it is the best time to try and bring this up again. And what better game to look at than a Platinum game. Platinum games are known for having some of the best boss fights in video games... Most of the time. But when they do it right, god, do they do it right. and Madworld is no exception. It has some of the craziest bosses for a beat 'em up game. It's not the weirdest bosses Platinum has made, that would be Bayonetta, but they're weird in their own way. Some of them work, while others... Not so much. And that is what I am going to talk about today with toi all. Because, damn it, I want plus people to play this game. It deserves some recognition. We'll start with the worst for now.

5: Rin Rin



Howard : "And here comes Rinrin, the fantastic kung-fu queen. Kreese, didn't the two of toi have a thing a while back?"
Kreese: "If par "thing" toi mean a 5 minute fight that left me spitting teeth and pissing blood, yeah, then we had a thing."

Okay, so Rin Rin isn't that terrible of a boss. I can think of others that are way worse, which is why she is not higher. But the plus I looked into her actual fight, the plus I realized that it wasn't really that good. Her fight consist of her constantly blocking your attacks, no matter what toi do. toi could swipe at her with your chainsaw all day, but toi will not get anywhere. The only way toi can ever hit her is if toi perform a power struggle ou throw bombs at her. It's a damn shame, too, that her fight is so mindlessly simple and kind of boring after a while, because she manages to have some good qualities. She has a very cool power struggle, almost sexual in a way, and her theme song, toi Don't Know Me, is one of the catchiest in the game in my opinion and really fits her personality well. Rin Rin is far from a terrible boss, but just a very basic one. I can at least say that she was used better in another game, Anarchy Reigns, where she was able to become a playable character, along with her two sisters, so thank god for that. But, as a boss, I just find her boring.

4: Little Eddie



Kreese: "You know what I don't get? I don't get why they call him Little Eddie when he's so fucking big."
Howard: "I think its supposed to be ironic."
Kreese: "...What?"
Howard: "You know, the use of words to express something other than and especially the opposite of the literal meaning, usually a humourous ou sardonic literary style ou form."
Kreese: "...You got beat up in school a lot, didn't you?"
Howard: "...Yes."

Okay, here's another boss that isn't terrible. Little Eddie, being the first boss of the game, isn't that bad. He gets the job of first boss done easily, but maybe a little too easily. He manages to grab hold of toi easily, and just lets toi do power struggles, while he will rarely hit you. He feels plus like a roadblock that bleed when toi try to get it out of your way, and may get a free hit in, but that's a big maybe. Little Eddie does get the job done as a first boss, I understand that. He is far from a terrible boss. Honestly, he may be better than Rin Rin in some cases, but I think that it's plus fun to try and stagger a boss when they block as they try to fight you, than a boss that stands there and may fight toi while toi just chip away at their health. I'm sorry that I am not finding much terrible bosses, but that's probably a good thing. Madworld has so few terrible bosses. But don't worry, because now we'll start to get to the real bad ones.

3: Martin



Kreese: "I hate this son of a bitch, Martin. The guy's a giant robot controlled via remote control par some fat fuck chicken-shit too scared to fight for himself."
Howard: Why do they let him do that?
Kreese: "Uh, probably cause he's got a giant killer robot."
Howard: "Makes sense."

Now this is a boss that I can hate on. While not annoying, Martin is just boring. Despite being a giant robot that toi have to fight, you'd think it would be plus fun than this. But instead, toi are not allowed to go near the robot. toi have to avoid it, else toi will get destroyed for even attempting to try and fight it up close. Your only way of fighting it is grabbing hold of a rocket launcher and blasting it away. While that sounds fun, it isn't here. toi are resorted to slower movement and a single button to push as toi slowly watch Martin's health drain until toi eventually run out of rockets. It could have been fun, hell, we did get a fun boss fight with a giant robot in Metal Gear Rising, but clearly, we didn't get it here. And trust me, the finisher isn't much better. All it does is just explode in a generic fashion. What's Madworld known for? It's fountains of blood. Not a single drop of blood is spilled in this boss fight. There are a lot of fun fights with giant robots. This is not one of them.

#2: Frank



Howard: Oh yeah. Frank! I remember toi fighting this guy in the '07 games. He had his hand so far up your cul, ass toi looked like an adorable hand puppet!
Kreese: Yeah, well they took the largest chunks off a bunch of dead fighters and stitched them together to make this electric motherfucker. Yeah, he's dumb as a box full of blondes, but stronger than shit with a coup de poing that'll zap the cul, ass off ya! Clumsy fucker, though. Jack can take him if he fights smart and fast!

Frank is probably one of the coolest looking redesigns of the Frankenstein's Monster I've ever say. Okay, I wanted to bring that up... Because that is where the compliments end for this boss. Everything else is terrible. Frank is a giant boss that can swipe his fist across the stage, and unless your dodging it constantly, toi will get hit par it. And sometimes, he will hit toi with an electric coup de poing that toi can't dodge, and will cause massive damage. But you'd better be careful not to get knocked into the water, because if toi do, he will begin to electrify the water for massive damage. The only way out is to run to dry land as fast as possible or, if your a coward, like me, backflip your way out. But if toi thought the bad news ended there... You're wrong. Frank will then make a beeline for his chair and begin to heal himself. Other bosses like Elise could heal themselves, but slowly, very little, and only if toi made a mistake and let it happen. Frank can heal almost half his health and all toi can do is attack him to try and keep him from regenerating less health. He will still get health back, no matter what, so all toi can do is try to keep him at the lowest amount toi possibly can. The only bright side is that his finisher is one of the hardest to watch in the game, but that just makes it better.

1: The Shamans



Howard: Here come the Shamans
Kreese: The Bleeding cœur, coeur whine that fourrure is murder, and in this case, they're abso-fucking-lutely. This pack of mangy motherfuckers chewed my cul, ass off in the '04 games. And to this day, I still shit a little crooked. When toi hear their howl, get ready for a rabid mauling from the whole savage pack
Howard: I didn't know toi shat crooked
Kreese: Little bit. Little bit

If toi thought that it couldn't get worse, well first, pay attention to the numbering. Second, toi were wrong. Frank, while annoying and cheap, functioned, gameplay wise. The Shamans are not only annoying and cheap, but they are broken as hell. First off, their stage, Mad Castle, is a mess, filled with glitches where your controller doesn't work, and for this level only, and a mini-boss that can insta kill toi easily. Then come the Shamans to just add an extra bad taste into your mouth. They can overwhelm toi in secondes and constantly attack toi and get in the way as toi try to attack the leader of the group, will always run away from you, and don't even bother with the power struggle. Unless toi are a hundred percent sure that your controller is working, toi will end up failing when toi clearly déplacer the controller in the right direction. It also doesn't help that the Shamans will hit toi with attacks when toi clearly dodged the attack par a mile off. Every other boss on here was either too easy, boring, ou annoying, but they functioned. They behaved the way they were programmed to. For whatever reason, The Shamans break all rules and manage to screw toi over with non-functioning controls, and it will piss toi off, even when toi are able to best them afterward. The Shamans are annoying, and unlike other bosses, don't function. Long story short: Fuck Mad Castle!

Alright, with that out of the way, let's focus on some bosses that are plus fun.

5: Jude the Dude



Howard: "So this is the cowboy's tenth time in a battle. He's become a regular fan favorite, with his flashy moves and lightning-fast quick draw."
Kreese: "Howard, I hate that prick! When we fought, that dirty bastard kicked me with the spurs and tore my scrotum."
Howard: "Hm."
Kreese: "Y'know, my nuts unravled like two balls o' yarn. Y'know how fuckin' long two balls o' yarn is?!"

Jude the Dude is the seconde boss in the game, and one of the hardest if toi aren't prepared. He rides around the stage, skating on his spurs as he takes pot shots at toi and hit toi with quick kicks from his spurs. He is very quick, and if toi aren't prepared, he will easily kill you. He's quite a wake up call from the fight with Little Eddie, that's for sure. The finisher is probably my favori in the game, where toi take Jude's pistolets and shoot him until he is nothing but a skeleton. But the best part about him is how much content there is around him, even going outside the boss fight. Jude is the only boss to have a cut death scene, where instead of being shoot into a skeleton, his pistolets would be rammed inside his rectum and he would be launched into the sky. Yeah, that's not uncomfortable. It is also believed that he is Death Blade, the terrible mini-boss of Mad Castle, since they both patin, patinage around the area. Even MadWorld has it's terrible game theories.

4: Shogun Kokushimusou



Howard: This is what we've been waiting for, folks
Kreese: Put the kids to bed, because we don't want them to see this.
Howard: Did toi really want them to see anything up to this point?
Kreese: Shit, why not? Don't want to raise a society full of pussies
Howard: Now we're in for a fight
Kreese: Fucking A. It's time for the big boys to dance
Howard: Just like the great gladiators of ancient Rome, these two men will enter the arena and clash in hand-to-hand combat for nothing plus than the entertainment of the rich and powerful
Kreese: Where the fuck did that come from?
Howard: I read it on a greeting card once

This fight is way plus epic, not for the boss fight, per say (Which is still good), but for the stage it takes place in. The level beforehand was probably one of the best in the game, with hundreds of surprises from ninjas ou motorcycle enemies to hundreds of ways to kill them. But the fight with the Shogun makes the level, probably the best one in the game. toi have to dodge his buzz saw staff, while each power struggle toi succeed at causing his armor to fall apart until he is left with nothing but his samurai mask. But as toi continue to fight, the stage around toi and the Shogun will begin to burn, turning the level into a burning inferno. Once toi have taken out all of Shogun's health, he will jump up onto the roof, where toi will follow and finish him off on haut, retour au début of the dojo roof in the snow par impaling him on a spike. The level beforehand had tons of hype, and the crazy boss fight mixed with brilliant level design just made the fight that plus incredible to me.

3: The Masters



"Kreese: Aw Man. Thunder and Sun, the fucking Father and Son geek team. They take all that pissed off "I have no social skills, and can never get laid." energy, and channel it into those wienie-ass hate sabers, that they wave around like they were at a fucking Si-Fi conventon.
Howard: I believe they referred to them as 'electroblades' when they carved their initials on your pancreas in your last matchup?
Kreese: What the fuck ever, at least I don't live in my mom's basement, ou in the case of Geek Jr. Grandma's basement. "

Originally, I always considered this boss to be the best, aside from the final boss, but I found a new favorite, really. But that doesn't mean The Masters are any less amazing. They entire fight is a parody on étoile, star Wars, with toi fighting a clear similarity to Jedi Knights with lightsabers, ou electroblades, and attack toi with the Force, ou in their case, electromagnetism. They will both come at toi after one attacks, meaning toi will need to watch them as they attack you. It sounds cheap, but toi will be able to predict it so it never feels unfair if they do hit you, making it a little plus fair. They will also begin to launch objects at you, which can it toi if toi aren't careful, but gives toi some free hits if toi are fast enough. They will even lift up heavy objects, where toi will have to throw them off toi and even slice a truck in half as they throw it at you. And the finisher has toi shove your chainsaw through ones chest and use their electromagnetism to smash the other against the walls before finally killing them. The Masters was probably one of the most Dark Souls-esque bosses on this liste just for how challenging they can be in numbers, and it managed to somehow be better than most of Dark Souls 2's duo bosses... Yes, I a dit it.

2: Herr Frederick Von Twirlenkiller



Kreese: "This is the airhead that blew my cul, ass away in the Cuba Games. I still have a collapsed lung from that match!"
Howard: "Jeez!"
Kreese:"Now I have to smoke twice as much weed to get high."

Let me tell toi right now, just the appearance of this boss made me know that this would be one of the best in the game. From the sight of him to the threatening tone of his boss theme, Bang. Von Twirlenkiller uses the machines on his arms to create massive tornados that carry him across the stage and uses them as projectiles as toi rush towards him. When toi do run up to him, it becomes a fist fight, where he will even launch himself towards toi with tiny tornados. During the power struggle, toi are able to rip off one of his arms and even use it as a weapon, but that doesn't even stop him from fighting. He will just balance himself on his other arm to deliver a spin kick to you. Even with one arm, he is able to fight toi for a good amount of the fight. Once toi cut his other arm off in another power struggle, toi will launch him into the air and use his own arm to grind him up with a tornado and win the boss fight. Little Eddie was a decent first boss, and Jude the Dude was a great seconde boss, but Von Twirlenkiller was the true boss that let toi know that this was when the bosses get good. Aside from Martin... And Frank... And The Shamans- The majority of them would be good, anyway. Also, side note, Von Twirlenkiller is apparently the bassist in a band, called "The Wind Breakers". Yeah, there's a bit of Madworld Trivia for you

(THE suivant ENTRY WILL BE SPOILERS FOR THE FINAL BOSS OF MADWORLD! STOP lire IF toi DO NOT WANT THE GAME SPOILED FOR YOU!)

1: The Black Baron



Howard: "Jack has climbed a mountain of bodies to reach this, the pinnacle of the DeathWatch competition! Here in this amazing stadium in front of a bloodthirsty crowd of the city survivors, Jack will face his final foe in the ultimate fight for the championship!"
*Kreese: "There can be only one Number 1 in this fight to the death!"
Howard: Well, duh. It's a mathematical fact there can only be one Number 1!"
Kreese: "For the last fucking time, NOBODY a dit THERE'D BE MATH!!!!!"
Together (singing): "I BLAME OUR SCHOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSS!"

Throughout the entirety of Madworld, The Black Baron was just a character that introduced the mini games for Madworld, The Bloodbath Challenges, where he would always be beaten par his... assistant to montrer toi how the game works, but would always come back to montrer toi the suivant one. So imagine everyone's surprise when they found out he was the final boss and Rank 1 in Deathwatch. The Black Baron will fight toi without any weapons ou any cheap tricks. He will fight toi in a boxing ring, and only fight toi with his fists, giving toi a few quick punches. On your side, toi have the Geisha's that Jack saved from the dojo, while The Black Baron has his assistant ready to beat toi with her bat if toi are knocked out par the Baron. His boss theme, Look Pimpin, is one of the most chill and catchiest songs in the game, about how Jack is cramping the style of the Baron and the Baron wanting to bitchslap Jack. But once he has Lost half of his health, the Black Barron becomes furious, and nowhere is it plus clear than when Look Pimpin' changes to the song So Cold. The song becomes something plus dark and threatening, and the Black Barron changes as well, where he has become pissed off. He now has lightning fast punches, an electrifying dive kick, and crazy rocket punch, and can create a black hole that will suck toi up and send toi into the crowd for massive damage, even end up as a one hit kill if you're unlucky. But when the final power struggle starts, with toi both delivering punches to the others face, before toi launch the Barron out of the stage, but is brought back for toi to continue the beat down. Finally, toi finish the Barron off par launching him into a giant dart board. The Black Barron is one of my favori final bosses in video games, simply just because of how a boss went from a simple hand-to-robotic-chainsaw-hand fight to a crazy battle with the other gaining insane superpowers. I l’amour this fight, and the Black Barron will always be my favori boss in Madworld. And I am so happy he is playable in Anarchy Reigns. That just made me happy inside