'Because' 

'Vampire Diaries' recap: 'I Could Never Love Like That'

Now it feels like we’re finally getting somewhere. Between Elena discovering the cure and Caroline flipping her humanity switch back on, we are headed full speed ahead toward Nina Dobrev’s last finale. And if tonight’s hour set the tone, I think I’m going to like it. Let’s dig in!

We start with Stefan and Caroline, who have just arrived at a B&B. As Stefan previously told Damon and Elena, he has a fairly simple three-step plan to get Caroline to flip her switch:

3) Drain her blood, make her weak, and then bombard her with everything she used to care about… with the real kicker being a letter her mother wrote her and mailed just before she died. (Do people really do that in real life?)

And yes, Elena, Stefan and Caroline hooked up. And yes, Damon, it’s likely Caroline will choose to have “sexy Stefan time” instead of “an assault on memory lane” because who wouldn’t?!

But when Damon arrives at the B&B and shoots both Caroline and Stefan—for show—with vervain, the plan seems to be off to a good start.

Three days later, we find Caroline and Stefan in a now-very-bloody room, where Damon has vampire-proofed the entire B&B. So while Jo and Alaric watch over the place—and makeout occasionally after talking about tasting wedding cake—Damon heads to ask Bonnie for a favor. He sort of gave Lily the ascendant, which means she’s going to come to Bonnie sooner or later to ask about saving her “witchpire” friends. As you can probably guess, Bonnie then yells at Damon before deciding that she needs to get that ascendant back.

Meanwhile, Elena’s enjoying being on watch at the B&B, where she delivers Liz’s letter to Caroline. But it seems she tried to play that card too soon. Instead of opening the letter, crying her eyes out, and then flipping her switch, Caroline burns the letter. (Seriously, what is it with humanity-less vampires and their desire to burn precious things?)

Back at The Grill, Matt—who’s a manager now or something?—is trying to stall Lily for Bonnie when Enzo enters. He’s decided he wants a reunion with the woman who turned him and then abandoned him. But much like Lily didn’t

abandon Enzo. She informs him that the night he turned was the night she was captured by the Gemini coven. See? She would never have left such an attractive man by choice!

And speaking of attractive men, by the time Damon gets to the B&B, Elena has decided that she sucks at torturing people. But little does she know that playing a “let’s pretend we’re human fantasy game” will be all the torture Caroline needs. As Caroline listens in, Elena tells Damon where she’d be in five years if she were human: She’d be living in a loft in Tribeca, above the bar Damon works at. As he puts it, he’d be Matt Donovan in her fantasy … except she makes him owner of the bar. (Clearly she hasn’t seen Matt’s new button-up. Owner probably isn’t far away.)

Then she tells him that she would be in a surgical residency program and that they’d have two kids together. (Nobody tell her that they could never afford a loft in Tribeca.)

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