SeanTheHedgehog & Izfankirby present
Grand Theft Ponies
San Franciscolt, December 1988
The fanfic begins with Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin at Gordon's house. They are watching a football game. The Eagles are beating the Giants 21-10
Gordon: I always told toi that the Giants sucked.
Case Cracker: Calm down, halftime just ended. They've had some bad luck is all.
Gordon: No kidding. They'll never win a game.
Suddenly, the phone rings.
Gordon: Ah good. Commercials, and a call. *picks up phone* Hello?
Jim: salut Gordon, it's Jim. Get Case biscuit salé, craquelin with you, and meet me at the Pizzeria on Mane Ashbury.
Gordon: Alright. We're on our way.
Case Cracker: *grabs glasses as he is leaving*
Gordon: *Turns off TV* Let's take your car.
Case Cracker: *Nods*
The both of them walked out of the house when a mail poney arrived.
Postman: Mornin' Gordon.
Gordon: Hello. What have ya got?
Postman: The usual bills, and a letter from this mare I don't even know.
Gordon: Alright, give it to me, I'll put it in my house.
Postman: *Gives Gordon his mail*
Case Cracker: Hurry up.
Gordon: I will if toi shut up. *Runs into the house*
Case Cracker: *Gets into the driver's siège of the car*
Gordon: *Gets in car* Let's do this.
Case Cracker: *Starts the car, and drives to the pizzeria*
Gordon: *turns on radio*
News Reporter: This just in, the Rock Island Biker gang has attacked again. As a family of four were driving across the Golden Neigh Bridge, the Rock Island bikers shot up their car, and a volé, étole all the money in there.
Gordon: I hate those fucking bikers.
One minute later, they got to the pizzeria
Case Cracker: *Enters pizzeria with Gordon* What cha' got for us this time Jim?
Jim: I've got a load of cocaine that needs to get safely to the airport. Unfortunately a friend of mine is very obsessed with that shit in Manehattan.
Gordon: This is pretty serious.
Jim: Yes it is. I've got a Lunicorn in the parking lot with the drugs, toi just gotta get it to the airport, and collect the money.
Case Cracker: And what are the terms?
Jim: None. Just get it to the airport, and give it to the pilot of this green aircraft. He'll pay toi seven thousand dollars. Once toi get the money, just come back here, and give it to me.
Gordon: Ok, we got it.
Jim: *gives keys to Gordon* Here are the keys to the car, and be careful.
Gordon: toi can count on us Jim. *leaves*
Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin got in a black Lunicorn Continental. They were heading to the airport to deliver cocaine.
Gordon: The airport shouldn't be far away. Turn on the radio if you'd like.
Case Cracker: *turns on radio and begins to chercher for a station* Sounds like a lotta static.
Gordon: Maybe because this car is old. *Stops at red light* Let me try. *turns onto 98.1* This radio station has a lot of rock & roll, but right now they're playing a commercial.
Announcer: Behold, the best cars toi could ever ask for, from Chevronet. Chevronet has made many enjoyable cars, from the Belair to the Corvette. From the Station Wagon to the Pearla. All four are great cars, because they're made par Chevronet.
This song starts playing on the radio: link
Case Cracker: *Rolls down windows and turns the musique up*
Mares: *Staring at Case Cracker*
Gordon: You're getting a lot of attention.
The light turns green
Gordon: *driving 36 miles an hour*
Case Cracker: *switches glasses to dark shades as they drive away*
Gordon: *Turns right*
Police Pony: *Driving a police car on the other side of the road*
Gordon: Oh damn.
Case Cracker: oh, buck...
Gordon: Oh thank christ. For a moment, I thought they'd arrest us for the crack. It's a good thing we're near the airport.
Case Cracker: Yeah, we can't draw attention to ourselves...
Gordon: Hey, I'm just following the speed limit.
Soon they arrive at the airport, and Gordon turns off the music.
Case Cracker: So, this is the place.
Gordon: Yep. Now we got to find a poney with a green airplane.
Case Cracker: *Casually trots through the airport looking for the correct airplane*
Gordon: *Slowly driving around airport* Aha, there it is.
Gordon stopped the car, and the pilot of the green plane came out.
Pilot: toi got the cocaine?
Case Cracker: *Walking towards Gordon*
Gordon: Case, open the trunk, and bring the cocaine to him.
Case Cracker: *Opens tronc door. He takes a case out, and walks to the pilot. He opens the case for the pilot to see*
Pilot: *Looks at cocaine* Ah excellent. *takes drugs* Here's your money. *pays seven thousand dollars*
Case Cracker: Cool, now we've just gotta get it back.
Suddenly, a police officer arrived
Chase song: link
Police: Freeze!! Put the cocaine on the ground right now!
Pilot: toi guys go! I'll cover you!
Gordon: *gets in car*
Case Cracker: *To cops* Buck NO!
Gordon: *Drives forward*
Cops: *Arrive in five police cars, and begin to chase Gordon*
Pilot: *Taking off in his airplane*
Cop: Stop that airplane!!!
Cop 63: *Grabs a sub machine gun, and shoots the plane*
Pilot: *Gets hit. He loses altitude, and crashes into a building*
Gordon: Holy shit!!
Case Cracker: There goes the drugs.
Gordon: At least we got the money. Let's lose these pigs. *Drifts to the right as he gets out of the airport*
Case Cracker: Yeah, cuz' I am not going back to a cell.
par the time they got away from the airport, six police cars started following them.
Case Cracker: How many cops could possibly follow us?
Gordon: Never mind that. Shoot them.
Case Cracker: *Loads a Tec 9 with an extended clip, and extra firepower. He shoots two of the police cars*
Cop 65: We got smoke coming out of the hood!
Cop 84: They must've hit the engine.
Cop 65: *He can't see where he is going, and ends up crashing into a mailbox*
Gordon: Only five more, keep shooting.
Case Cracker: *Shoots the tire on one police car*
Cop 25: *Losing control, and gets hit par the other police cars causing a pile up*
Case Cracker: Holy shit!
Gordon: That's gotta hurt.
Case Cracker: We definitely Lost those cops.
Gordon: Yeah, but Jim is not going to be happy when he hears about the cocaine.
Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin returned to Mane Ashbury, to tell Jim the bad news.
Gordon: Jim, we got a problem.
Jim: Don't tell me-
Gordon: I'm sorry, but the cops shot down the plane, and it blew up.
Jim: Those assholes! Not only did they screw up our operation, but now they caused a war.
Case Cracker: What are toi talking about?
Jim: If my friend in Manehattan doesn't get his pleasure in poison, he'll déplacer his entire mafia here to declare war against us.
Jim: You're goddamn right that's shit. The worst pile of shit toi could ever get stuck in.
In Manehattan several hours later, Jim's friend was at his apartment
poney 72: Anthony? We have a problem.
Anthony: What sort of problem?
poney 72: Your friend Jim didn't send any drugs.
Anthony: That lousy cunt. Get our entire mafia over here now. We've got a war to declare.
poney 72: Yes sir, right away. *Walks away*
Anthony: I thought I could trust toi Jim. Now you're going to die along with all of your friends, and everything else toi like.
Meanwhile Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin were at the bowling alley
Case Cracker: So Gordon, we planin' on laying low for long?
Gordon: I don't think so. When they arrive, we just gotta be cautious. Jim will tell us about these guys tomorrow.
Case Cracker: Alright.
Soon, both ponies started bowling. par the time the game was near an end, it was all tied up. So far, both of them got all strikes.
Gordon: Ok, don't foul this up *rolls ball down lane*
Case Cracker: *watches bowling ball hit the pins* YEAH! *Hoofbumps Gordon* toi got eight man.
Gordon: I only need to get two plus to get a spare. *Rolls ball down lane, and sees the two pins go down* That's an extra turn for me.
Case Cracker: toi better get another strike man.
Gordon: I'll see what I can do. *Gets a bowling ball, and waits for the pins to be set*
Case Cracker: *Watching Gordon*
Gordon: *Rolls the ball down the lane*
Case Cracker: *watches ball roll down lane in suspense*
Gordon: *Watching* I got seven. Alright Case. toi gotta get a strike, and eight plus pins to beat me.
Case Cracker: *rolls ball down the middle of the lane*
Gordon: Ooh. This could be a strike.
Case Cracker: *watches the pins fall* Woahhh yeah!
Gordon: Now, just get eight plus pins.
Case Cracker: *Sees the pins being set, and grabs a bowling ball*
Gordon: I swear, if toi don't get this-
Case Cracker: Shut up. Let me do this. *Rolls ball towards the right. It curves to the left, and knocks down nine pins*
Gordon: Case, toi won. Nice job *hoofbump*
Case Cracker: *goes to staff* I got all strikes so I get my money back! *takes his money*
Staff: Fine now leave
Case Cracker: I will *goes outside the bowling alley*
Gordon: *Follows* Hey, that just reminds me. I got this letter from a mare this morning. She a dit she lived somewhere in Russian Hill, and is saying she wants to meet me.
Case Cracker: A mare? What does she want to meet toi for?
Gordon: I don't know. Perhaps she wants to ask me out on a date.
Case Cracker: Alright I'll leave toi to your 'business'. I'm gonna go accueil then.
Gordon: Yeah yeah, see toi tomorrow.
Later, Gordon went to Russian colline to meet the mare that sent him the letter.
Gordon: *Gets out of his car, and waits*
Erica: *Walks to Gordon* Hello.
Gordon: Hi. toi wouldn't happen to know about a mare that sent a letter to me, would you?
Erica: I sent toi that letter.
Gordon: Oh, toi did. Well I'm glad I received it.
Erica: Why don't we go somewhere plus private?
Gordon: Good idea.
They went into Erica's apartment. Everything seemed quiet at first. The rue lights were getting brighter as the sky got darker, and cars were just sitting still like statues. Then, Erica's voice could be heard from outside her apartment.
Erica: Oh, yes! Yes! *Pants*
Ponies: *Waking up* What the hell is happening?
Gordon: We're having sex! Fuck off!!!
suivant morning at Gordon's house, his phone rang
Gordon: *Wakes up* Hello?
Jim: They could be here any minute. Go find Case Cracker, and meet me at the pizzeria.
Gordon: Ok, I'll go get him.
But there was no need for that.
Gordon: *Goes to pizzeria* Case. I was supposed to pick toi up at your house. ou at least, Jim told me to do that.
Case Cracker: I just so happened to be near here. I was doing...things in town.
Gordon: What things?
Case Cracker: Is it really important? Let's go in *Enters pizzeria*
Gordon: *Follows inside*
Jim: Ah good. You're here. Now we just need to stop Anthony's Mafia from defeating us. All his stallions are wearing tuxedos, which is something nopony would usually wear in San Fran. So they shouldn't be hard to spot.
Case Cracker: So what do we need to do to stop them?
Jim: toi just have to kill them. There are thousands of them, and they'll try to take over our businesses. If they do that, we'll lose money. Now get going, and start searching for them around here.
Gordon: We're on it.
Jim: Good luck to toi both.
Case Cracker: *looks around outside pizzeria* We should check the suivant block over.
Case Cracker: *checks around the corner, and sees a gun in front of him (but not pointed at him) handled par a tuxedoed stallion. He pushes the gun away from himself*
Tuxedoed Stallion: *fires a shot missing Case Cracker*
Case Cracker: *punches the stallion while he (himself) has the gun pointed away from himself*
Tuxedoed Stallion: *falls to the floor, dropping his gun out of his reach*
Case Cracker: *picks up the stallions gun and points it at the tuxedoed stallion (with CC's own gun still on himself)*
Gordon: Nice work Case. Now, let's take this guy to Jim for questioning.
Case Cracker: *gun still pointed at him* LET'S GO!
Tuxedoed Stallion: *Hesitantly obeys*...*stops and spits in Case Cracker's direction*
Case Cracker: *raises gun against his head* toi WANNA DO THAT AGAIN? *kicks stallion towards where Jim is*
Tuxedoed Stallion: *Begins to walk (obeyingly) again*
Jim: toi got a lot of nerve doing this to my mafia.
Gordon: We just need to know where Anthony is.
Tuxedoed Stallion: I don't know.
Case Cracker: Shut up and tell us. *steps on one of his hooves*
Tuxedoed Stallion: Ahh! The last time I saw him he was in the drug store 6 blocks down from this trash heap.
Gordon: Well that wasn't so hard, was it? Now let's give him a surprise in the back.
Case Cracker: Alright. Let's go.
Gordon: *Takes tuxedoed stallion into back of pizzeria* Alright. Finish the job, and kill this idiot.
Case Cracker: We already got our information. Maybe he'll be some use later.
Gordon: Yeah. After he's dead. *Walks away*
Case Cracker: *Shoots the tuxedoed stallion, then walks back to Gordon* toi can drive to this one.
Gordon: With pleasure.
They decided to use Gordon's car. Just before Gordon started to drive, two El Doritos arrived, and started blocking the road.
Gordon: Hold on buddy *floors it backwards*
Case Cracker: *holds onto the car's door and middle section*
Gordon: We'll have to take a detour *performs a 180 degree turn, then turns right*
Manehattan ponies: *Starting to chase Gordon*
Case Cracker: *checks the locked doors. Looks back at the ponies chasing them* I cant tell if they..
Manehattan Ponies: *Shoot the back window*
Case Cracker: GET DOWN!! *ducks*
Gordon: *drifts to the right*
Manehattan ponies: *follow*
Gordon: *points gun out window, and shoots enemy car*
Case Cracker: *Shoots his gun outside of the car window*
Manehattan ponies: *Getting closer*
Gordon: *goes on sidewalk*
Pedestrians: AH!! *Get out of way*
Manehattan ponies: *shooting at car, and keep missing*
Gordon: Their aim sucks. *drifts to the right*
Case Cracker: *holds on as the car drifts, making sure he doesn't drop his gun*
The police soon arrive.
Gordon: *turns left*
Police: SFPD, stop your vehicles now!
Manehattan ponies: *ram police into building, but crash into another car*
Case Cracker: That looks like it slowed them down.
Gordon: I hope so. *continues driving to drug store* It's only two blocks away.
Case Cracker: *continues to keep an eye on the Manehattan stallion*
Manehattan ponies: *getting arrested*
Police: You're going to jail for two years for what you've done.
Manehattan ponies: I'm gonna kill those pricks.
Police: Four years.
Manehattan ponies: *Get in police cars*
Case Cracker: *looking back at the scene* That takes care of that.
Gordon: *Stops at drugstore*
Upon arrival, a few ponies in the store start to stare at them.
Case Cracker: What are they staring at us for?
Gordon: How should I know?
Ponies in store: *Grab guns, and start shooting*
Gordon: *Creates shield*
Manehattan poney 52: They're unicorns! Shoot there horns off.
Case Cracker: Well that escalated quickly. *whips out two Beretta 92s'*
Gordon: *Grabs shotgun* I'm going in there. Cover me *runs to door*
Case Cracker: *shoots towards ponies, drawing their fire, killing two*
Gordon: *Knocks door down*
Manehattan ponies: *Shooting at Gordon*
Gordon: *Dodges bullets, and kills three with one shot* One of them is running to the back. Come on! *Chases survivor*
Case Cracker: *puts away one gun* I'll be over there! *starts car to block him off*
Survivor: *Runs up stairs*
Gordon: *Shoots gun*
Survivor: Ah! *avoids bullets* *Jumps out window*
Survivor: *sees Gordon's car*
Gordon: If that does not stop him, I don't know what will. *Follows survivor*
Survivor: *Fires at Gordon*
Gordon: *Gets shot in shoulder*
Case Cracker: *drives up to block survivor*
Survivor: *Turns around, and runs the other way*
Gordon: *Lands in front of him* You're not going anywhere asshole!
Survivor: *Runs back to Case Cracker*
Case Cracker: *Shoots the survivor*
Gordon: That was fun. *Walks back to his car* I had fun killing all those ponies. Anthony's mafia is getting smaller.
Case Cracker: Speaking of Anthony, was he in there?
Gordon: Nope. I don't think he'll be that easy to find.
Case Cracker: We have ta find him man! Maybe we left him somewhere at the drug store!
Gordon: Nah. Anthony is green, with a mustache. Nopony there was green.
Just then, the phone rang.
Gordon: This is probably Jim *grabs phone* Hello?
Jim: Hey. Did toi get the job done?
Gordon: It's done.
Jim: Ok, good. I heard that a couple of the manehattan ponies got in a fight with the Rock Island biker gang. The bikers beat the shit out of them. toi better watch out for them, and make sure they don't beat toi up.
Gordon: Ok. Is there anything else toi want us to do?
Jim: No, come to the pizzeria tomorrow, but in the meantime just look out for yourselves.
Gordon: Ok, thanks. *Hangs up*
Case Cracker: What did he say?
Gordon: He says we've done enough work for today, and to watch out for the Rock Island biker gang.
Case Cracker: Fine, but the sooner that poney is gone the better.
Gordon: I hear ya. *Drives away from the drug store*
After leaving the drugstore, Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin were thinking about what to do next. They had no plus work, and had the rest of the jour off.
Gordon: So, what do toi want to do, now that we've got the rest of the jour off?
Case Cracker: Hmm..I heard those Wonderbolts will preform in San Fransicolt. But I don't know. What about toi and your mare friend?
Gordon: I could bring her with us. Would that be ok?
Case Cracker: Okay I guess..
Gordon: You'll have to sit in the back when we get her.
Case Cracker: I figured...Does she live far?
Gordon: Not really. She lives in Russian hill. It should take us a few minutes to get there.
Case Cracker: Russian Hill? Okay.
Gordon: Ok. *drives to russian hill*
Along the way, they pass a Rock Island Biker, ou R.I.B for short. He was too busy vandalising a building, and did not notice Gordon, ou Case Cracker.
Case Cracker: *sees R.I.B.* Hope there aren't too many of them around here.
Gordon: toi know how it is. Lot's of them are around. Not just in San Fran, but they have so many of them that it goes all the way to Las Pegasus.
Case Cracker: Yeah... Aww well, lets just head to your mare friend's house.
Gordon: What does it look like we're doing? *Laughs* This is it *stops car*
Erica walks up to the car.
Case Cracker: *Gets into the back of the car* Sup?
Erica: Hi. *Enters car*
Gordon: Case biscuit salé, craquelin has invited us to watch the Wonderbolts with him.
Case Cracker: Yeah they'll be in San Franciscolt today.
Gordon: *Drives to Wonderbolt show*
Case Cracker: Have either of toi ponies seen the Wonderbolts preform before?
Erica: I can't say that I have.
Case Cracker: Well that's three of us...
Gordon: *Laughing* That'll change soon. *Arrives at Wonderbolt show*
The montrer was taking place at the Giants Stadium. Gordon, his friend, and his special somepony got seats in the highest row at the stadium.
Erica: This should be interesting.
Case Cracker: I heard that a wonderbolt has just recovered after overworking his wings. This is gonna be his first montrer after the recovery.
Gordon: Good. I hope he feels better.
Case Cracker: *Nods* Looks like they're about to start.
Gordon: Oh boy. *A little excited*
Erica: After the show, do toi boys wanna go to the strip club?
Gordon: Yes. We'll have sex nonstop for 24 hours.
Case Cracker: I don't have anything scheduled.
Erica: I've got a few Friends that can give toi a good time Case.
Case Cracker: Lookin' vers l'avant, vers l’avant to it.
Mare: Here comes the Wonderbolts!
Case Cracker: Looks like they're starting.
Gordon: This oughta be fun. *Sees a Rock Island Biker* Hey, there's a R.I.B par the entrance.
Case Cracker: *Tries to look above the crowd, wearing shades to make it look natural* Yeah, I see him. Let's go plus into the crowd.
Gordon: He's moving, but he's going away from us.
Case Cracker: Good maybe he'll let us watch the show. *Watches the Wonderbolts performance*
RIB: *grabs gun*
Ponies: AAAAAAAH! *Running*
RIB: *Shoots everyone*
Gordon: Goddammit. Let's get outta here. *Runs to car*
RIB: *Shoots Erica*
Erica: *Falls down stairs and dies*
Case Cracker: FUCK! *runs to the car*
Wonderbolts: *fly away*
Case Cracker: *stops behind a table, tableau for cover from aléatoire gunfire*
RIB Member: *notices Case biscuit salé, craquelin and dashes towards the table*
Case Cracker: *bucks the table, tableau at nearing RIB member*
RIB Member: *falls down*
Case Cracker: *runs for the car again*
Gordon: *Starts car* Come on Case, let's get outta here!
Case Cracker: *Gets inside the car*
Gordon: *drives away* Well, so much for going to the strip club.
Case Cracker: Yup. toi don't think they were out there for our gang in particular, do ya?
Gordon: Of course not, the Rock Island Bikers attack whoever they want without giving a fuck. They probably don't know if we're in a gang ou not. I think now, we should rob a store.
Case Cracker: toi got pistolets in the back?
Gordon: Yeah. Two assault rifles, and even a few grenades.
Case Cracker: Cool. I'll take a couple grenades when we get there.
They stopped at a bank
Gordon: toi ready?
Case Cracker: A bank? Well sure. Masks ou no masks?
Gordon: Masks *Puts on mask*
Case Cracker: *Grabs two grenades, and an assault rifle*
Gordon: *Runs into bank, and shoots two guards* toi know what this is everypony?!!?
poney 63: Uh... A bakery?
Gordon: NO! This is a robbery!!
Case Cracker: *Grabs bank worker, and pushes her towards the voûte door* Unlock that, ou else!
Bank Worker: *Puts in code to unlock voûte door*
Case Cracker: Nice work. *Shoots bank worker*
Gordon: Who wants to be a hero? Huh?
Ponies: *Laying on the ground*
Gordon: Good. Nopony wants to do anything. toi all just want to lay down there, and be the worthless retards toi are. *Points at the poney who thought the robbery was a bakery* ESPECIALLY YOU!!!!
Case Cracker: Come on man, I got the money!!
Gordon: So long douche bags.
Case Cracker: Here's a little present for you. *Throws grenade at them*
As soon as the two ponies left, the grenade exploded.
Gordon: Too easy. *Gets in*
Case Cracker: *Enters car*
Gordon: *starts car*
Gordon: Oh shit. *Floors it*
Chase song: link
Police: *Chasing Gordon*
Gordon: This sucks Case, they're using GMO's.
Case Cracker: They're using what??
Gordon: Canterlot GMO's. *drifts left*
Police: *Following in GMO's*
Gordon: There's only three of them. See if toi can shoot the driver of one of those cars.
Case Cracker: *gets out an assault rifle* K keep the car steady.. *aims outside the window at the cars*
Gordon: *driving as straight as possible*
Police: *About to ram car*
Case Cracker: *fires rounds and shoots a driver*
Police officer: *Crashes into building*
2nd driver: *crashes into first car*
3rd driver: *Avoids wreck*
Gordon: Wanna use this instead? *Holding grenade*
CC: *takes grenade pulls off clip with teeth*...*throws it at the windshield*
3rd driver: *fails to avoid the grenade par swerving*
The explosion blew up the 3rd car.
Case Cracker: Yes.
Gordon: That was good.
The suivant day, Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin were returning to work
Gordon: *Arrives at pizzeria*
Case Cracker: *arrives at the pizzeria wearing a new pair of glasses*
Gordon: Nice shades Case.
Case Cracker: Got them this morning.
Jim: Good for you. *Walks towards Gordon, and Case Cracker* Now listen up, Neigh York's mafia is having a secret meeting in the Equestrian Pyramid. toi gotta get there, and sabotage it. The meeting should be on the 15th floor.
Case Cracker: When is this meeting?
Jim: In two hours. That'll give toi enough time to stock up on guns, ammunition, and fuel for your car. Speaking of cars, I'd take Case's Dodge for this one.
Gordon: We're on it.
Case Cracker: *Walks to his car with Gordon*
Gordon: *Gets in passenger seat*
Case Cracker: *Gets in driver's seat, and starts the car. He starts driving to the nearest gas station* We should probably get the fuel first.
Gordon: Yeah, we already got the weaponry yesterday.
Case Cracker: Yes, they're in the back.
Gordon: *Looks out window* Shit, I almost forgot tomorrow is Christmas. What do toi have on your wishlist?
Case Cracker: *Pulls up to gas station* Don't know. Haven't thought of anything yet. *Gets out and begins to pompe gas*
Gas station attendant: Hey! You're not allowed to pompe your own gas
Gordan: *Kills gas station attendant* There's your Christmas present. Free gasoline.
Case Cracker: *laughs* Merry Christmas. *tank is filled up* Alright lets go. *drives*
Gordon: *turns on radio*
Radio pony: Welcome to 98.5, the radio station that plays musique from movies. Our suivant song is from Con Mane: The Living Neighlights.
Case Cracker: Hmm, I've heard this song before.
Gordon: Have toi seen the movie?
Case Cracker: Some parts of it.
Gordon: Just some? toi must see the entire thing when this job is over
Case Cracker: *Goes into parking lot of Equestrian Pyramid*
Gordon: We'll need a pistol, and grenades. If they see us carrying assault rifles, we're done for.
Case Cracker: *Stops car*
Gordon: We'll take them par surprise.
Case Cracker: *Turns the car off* So we're just wiping out the mafia on the 15th floor?
Gordon: Basically. I've got everything planned out. *Goes into laundry room* Follow me.
Case Cracker: *follows, and whispers* Are innocent ponies on the 15th floor?
Gordon: Who cares? *goes to small room* There are some outfits we can take to look like janitors. Nopony will know who we are *Putting on outfit*
Case Cracker: Fine. *puts on janitors outfit*
Gordon: Alright. Now we go to the haut, retour au début floor. *Goes to stairs*
Manehattan pony: Hey. toi two, get over here.
Manehattan: *Points at water on floor* Clean up this mess toi bastards!
Gordon: Ok, I'll clean up the "mess" *Knocks out pony* Let's hurry up. *Pushes button for elevator*
Case Cracker: *Waits for elevator*
The elevator arrives, and they both get on
Gordon: *Pushes button*
The doors close
Case Cracker: *checks if concealed pistols are ready*
Gordon: *Makes elevator go up to haut, retour au début floor* We have half an heure before that meeting starts. We'll get on a lift from the roof, throw grenades into the room where the meeting is, and kill everypony.
Case Cracker: Got it. Will there be ponies par the lift ou roof?
Gordon: Maybe. I got extended clips for our pistols. Each extended clip holds 25 bullets.
Case Cracker: Good.
They reached the haut, retour au début floor
Gordon: *Loads gun* Alright. Here we go. *Exits elevator*
Case Cracker: *exits* Wait. *uses tracking magic making his horn glow a metallic or and his eyes glow* Two Manehattans went down the hall to the right a couple of minutes ago.
Gordon: Are there any of them on the roof?
Case Cracker: *continues to preform spell. He looks towards stairs that lead to the roof* 3 of them went up there, looks like 2 earth ponies and one pegasus. Hope they're not expecting something. *stops preforming spell*
Gordon: Maybe they're smoking on break. We'll have to kill them quickly, otherwise they'll call for reinforcements. *Goes upstairs*
Case Cracker: toi have a silencer?
Gordon: We don't need one. *Kicks door open*
Manehattan pony: Hey, what the hell are toi doing here?
Gordon: *Shoots two Manehattan ponies with one bullet*
Third Manehattan Pony: *Running for door*
Gordon: *Shoots third pony* That was close. If he went through that door, he would be calling for reinforcements, and we'd be done for. *Walks to lift*
Case Cracker: Well then. *follows towards lift*
Gordon: *Goes on lift* Those ponies are in for a surprise. Literally
Case Cracker: *arrives at lift* So ya ready *takes out grenade with hoof, and holds gun with magic*
Gordon: *Makes lift go down*
Case Cracker: *sees the mafia gathered* *pulls the pin of the grenade using his mouth* 1...2. *throws grenade through the window*
Gordon: *Throws grenade, and makes lift go up*
Suddenly, an explosion occurred.
Gordon: Let's go back down, and finish the rest of them.
Case Cracker: On your mark. *readies pistol*
Gordon: *Makes lift go down* Get set.
Manehattan Ponies: *Running away*
Gordon: *stops lift* Go *Runs in room*
Case Cracker: *Runs inside. Shoots 3 running away*
Manehattan ponies: *Grab Shotguns*
Gordon: *Shoots a pony's head off* Get behind the counter *Gets behind counter*
Case Cracker: *Ducks behind counter*
Manehattan poney 36: *Shoots the counter* Get up, and fight like stallions toi cowards!
Case Cracker: Fight this! *Shoots the poney in the heart*
Manehattan Ponies: *Leaving*
Gordon: *Shoots near Anthony*
Manehattan Pony: *Shoots at Gordon*
Gordon: *Throws grenade*
Manehattan Pony: *Dies, and nearly shoots Anthony*
Case Cracker: *shoots 2 ponies hiding behind cover* Some are getting away!
Gordon: No shit! Cut them off! *Runs to elevator*
Anthony: *Runs downstairs*
Case Cracker: *Chases after Anthony*
Manehattan Pony: *Drives slowly*
Anthony: *Gets in car*
Case Cracker: *(while running) shoots at driver* *misses the driver hitting the passenger in his upper forearm*
Gordon: *Throws grenade in Anthony's back window*
Anthony: *sees grenade* Get out! *Jumps out of car*
The car exploded, and was blocking the path for Gordon, and Case Cracker's escape
Case Cracker: *advances on Anthony, taking cover behind a truck*
Anthony: *Slowly runs away* toi fuckers won't get me!
Manehattan ponies: *Run into garage*
Gordon: *grabs AR-15* We got company *Shoots Manehattan ponies*
Case Cracker: *Reloads gun*
Gordon: Start the car *Moves destroyed car out of the way with magic*
Manehattan poney 1: Get the orange unicorn!
Manehattan poney 2: No, get the one with the glasses!
Gordon: *Kills both ponies*
Case Cracker: *Gets in the car, and starts it* C'mon there's plus of em'!
Gordon: *Shoots plus ponies, and runs in car* Floor it!
Case Cracker: *speeds the car out of there*
Gordon: They're not following us.
Case Cracker: Good. Looks like we got lots of em. Enough to keep them from chasing after us.
Gordon: Let's go to Jim, and tell him the job is complete.
Case Cracker: *Drives to Jim's location*
As Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin were driving back to the pizzeria, they talked about their enemy.
Gordon: I wonder how many plus manehattan ponies are left.
Case Cracker: I don't know, I guess enough to protect Anthony. plus were coming out after they were alerted.
Gordon: Maybe since Anthony is dead, they'll leave this town, and go back to where they came from.
Case Cracker: Wait. Anthony's dead?
Gordon: I think so. Didn't I kill him with that grenade in the car?
Case Cracker: It should have.
Gordon: I hope so.
They arrived at the Pizzeria
Case Cracker: *To Jim* We've sabotaged the Neigh York mafia. Killed a good number of them.
Jim: Ah good. I just got word from one of our ponies, that Anthony is still alive. He plans on escaping tomorrow. He'll be at the airport where toi two delivered the crack.
Gordon: Ah, I remember that day. We'll get him tomorrow.
Case Cracker: Agreed.
Gordon: *Calling Case Cracker*
Case Cracker: *Picks up, and is sleepy* What's up?
Gordon: We gotta go kill Anthony. Get to the airport, I'll meet toi with the weapons.
Case Cracker: I'll be there.
Gordon: Alright. See toi there *Hangs up, and walks outside*
Case Cracker: *Drives to airport*
Gordon: *Gets in his car, and drives to airport*
Both ponies arrived at the airport.
Case Cracker: *Parks his car, then gets out*
Gordon: *stops behind him. He stays in the car as he watches Case biscuit salé, craquelin walk towards him* Glad to see toi made it.
Case Cracker: Yeah, what weapons did toi bring for us?
Gordon: Machine Guns, grenades, and rocket launchers. We'll need all that for destroying the airplane that Anthony is on. Get in my car, we got to get as close to the piste as possible.
Case Cracker: *gets in car* So are we entering the plane?
Gordon: We're getting as close as we can to the plane, and when Anthony arrives, we shoot him. If somehow he gets on that plane, we use those rockets I brought along to blow that plane up.
Anthony: *Walking to airplane*
Gordon: There he is *Driving fast towards Anthony*
Case Cracker: *Gets his Stoner 63 ready* Give me a clear shot.
Anthony: Oh shit! *Running to airplane*
Gordon: *stops car* Get him before he gets in!
Case Cracker: *fires full auto shots at Anthony hits him 3 times*
Anthony: Ah! *falls off plane*
Gordon: Stay here *Walks out car*
Anthony: *Laying on ground*
Gordon: *Walks over* Jim Braddock sends his regards *Kills Anthony*
Case Cracker: *waits in car expectant of security to montrer soon*
Gordon: *Returns to car* Anthony is dead, but we're not out of the woods yet *Drives backwards onto road*
Case Cracker: My gun's loaded.
Manehattan Ponies: *Following*
Gordon: Two cars behind us.
Case Cracker: *shoots outside the window breaking the windshield of a Manehattan pony's car*
Manehattan pony: *Losing control*
Gordon: Please crash.
Manehattan pony: *Gets back control*
Gordon: No! Wait a minute, I got an idea *Goes onto highway*
Case Cracker: *continues firing shooting a tire of a Manehattan pony's car*
Manehattan pony: *Drives off road*
Gordon: Nice, but we need to get that seconde car. *Passes delivery truck*
Case Cracker: *sprays plus rounds, shoots the Manehattan driver* Got em.
Manehattan Pony: *Holding wound*
Manehattan Pony2: Watch where you're going!!
Manehattan Pony: *Drives off bridge*
Gordon: That was great.
Case Cracker: *lowers gun* We don't have to worry about Anthony anymore.
Gordon: Yeah. We'll find a phone booth, and tell Jim.
Gordon, and Case biscuit salé, craquelin were at a phone booth par a drug store when this happened.
Gordon: *Inserts coins in phone booth, and dials Jim's number*
Case Cracker: *Waits in the car*
Gordon: It's done. Anthony is dead.
Jim: That's good. Come on down to the pizzeria, and I'll-
RIB's: *Shooting ponies in pizzeria*
Jim: *Gets shot* AGH! Get over here quickly!! *Hangs up*
Gordon: *Runs to car* Case, Jim is in trouble. I don't know what's happening, but we have to go help him quickly *Drives onto highway*
Case Cracker: Let's hurry then!
Gordon: *Going 90 miles an hour*
Case Cracker: *Impatiently waits to arrive*
Gordon: *Drifts left*
aléatoire pony: *Honks horn* Go to hell!
Gordon: *stops at pizzeria*
RIB's: *Putting Jim in van*
Gordon: Those bikers are taking Jim in that delivery van
RIB 53: *Driving van*
Gordon: *Chasing van*
Case Cracker: I think my bullets would hit Jim if I shot the van.
Gordon: He's in the back, I'll try to get in front. When I do, toi shoot the driver. *Going faster then van*
Case Cracker: That should work.
Just when Gordon got in front of the van however
RIB Driver: *Goes right*
Gordon: Damnit *Goes backwards, then turns right on road that van is on*
RIB Driver: *Turns left*
Gordon: *hits van*
RIB 35: *Shoots grille*
Gordon: They're trying to kill the engine.
Case Cracker: *shoots a RIB (not driver)*
Gordon: *Rams van*
RIB Driver: *Loses control*
Case Cracker: *fires rounds at the unstable car, shooting the driver*
RIB Driver: *Hits a car, and dies*
Gordon: *stops suivant to van* We gotta get Jim out of there. *Gets out of car*
Case Cracker: *exits the car, and reaches inside the open window to unlock the van*
Gordon: Hang on Jim, we'll get toi out.
Jim: toi better hurry up!
Gordon: toi got the van unlocked yet?
Case Cracker: *Van is unlocked* Yeah.
Jim: *Exits van* Thanks toi guys. I don't know what I'd do without you.
Gordon: Those fucks fucked with the wrong pony. Let's finish them off.
Case Cracker: toi know where they went?
Jim: They're somewhere in Oatland. We'll take this van towards an abandoned warehouse I know very well, and put on their uniforms.
Case Cracker: Great, I'm done putting up with them.
Jim: Alright, I'm driving. toi two get in the back.
Gordon: *gets in back*
Jim: *enters driving seat*
Case Cracker: *gets in the back*
Jim: *Drives van*
Jim, Case Cracker, and Gordon were about to make their attack on the Rock Island Bikers, but first they needed to do something at an abandoned warehouse.
Jim: *Driving the van*
Gordon: Hey. When toi a dit abandoned warehouse, what did toi mean par that?
Jim: It's a place only I know about. Since toi two are going to see it, toi can't tell anypony else. Got it?
Gordon: Got it.
Case Cracker: Got it. Whats at this abandoned warehouse anyways?
Jim: A lot of guns, and ammunition. toi put those RIB uniforms on now. We want to fool them.
Case Cracker: Alright. *puts on uniform*
Gordon: *puts on uniform*
Jim: Excellent. We're here. *stops van* Load up the pistolets while I get dressed *Putting on uniform*
Case Cracker: *takes pistolets from warehouse and puts them in the back of the van. He keeps his pistol on him, concealed under the uniform*
Gordon: *Puts assault rifles in back of truck* Some of these have grenade launchers.
Case Cracker: Great, those will give us an advantage.
Gordon: Okay *Gets in back of van* We're ready Jim.
Case Cracker: *gets in back of van, prepared to leave*
Jim: *Drives backwards*
Gordon: toi don't plan on driving backwards all the way, do you?
Jim: *Does Rockford turn* Nope. From now on, we're going forward.
Gordon: That's good. I thought toi were going crazy, and decided to go backwards all the way to Oatland.
Case Cracker: *chuckles*
Jim: *Gets on the baie Bridge*
Case Cracker: ...
Gordon: What's the matter with toi Case? toi don't look too good.
Case Cracker: Ehh, nothing. Just thinking about something...
Jim: *Enters Oatland*
Gordon: Ah, good old Oatland. Too bad that these Rock Island bikers live here.
Case Cracker: *leers as the van passes a group of RIB members off of their trail*
Gordon: Get down *gets on floor*
CC: *gets down* why are we getting down don't we have their uniforms on?
Gordon: I found a penny.
Case Cracker: *Sighs, and takes Gordons penny away*
Gordon: What the fuck?!
Case Cracker: I thought it was important!
Gordon: It is important. Now give me that penny back.
Jim: Case, give Gordon his penny!
Case Cracker: *groans. Sets penny on the l’espace between them*
Gordon: Thank you. *takes penny*
Jim: Okay, we're here.
Case Cracker: Great. *fixes pistol so it is concealed and comfortable*
Gordon: *Loads up grenade launcher*
Jim: *Sets up machine gun* Let's do this *Floors it towards a house*
RIB: What the fuck is this?
Jim: *Crashes through door, then backs up*
The house fell down, and all the Rock Island bikers came to kill the three stallions. There is another house suivant to the one Jim just knocked down.
RIB: Get them *shoots front window*
Jim: *shooting RIB's*
Gordon: *Gets out of van*
RIB 64: *Shooting at Gordon*
Gordon: *shoots RIB*
RIB 236: *Going towards Case Cracker*
Gordon: Case, look out!
Case Cracker: *Shoots the RIB before he could come close*
Jim: Come on, let's get inside.
Case Cracker: *Exits van*
Gordon: *opens door* Hello everypony.
RIB's: The mafia is here. Kill them.
Jim: *Shoots two RIB Ponies*
Case Cracker: *Shoots a RIB with a submachine gun*
Jim: There's twelve of them left.
Gordon: *Runs upstairs* This oughta be the last of them.
RIB 12: *Shoots at Jim
Gordon: Stay behind the wall. When they stop shooting, return fire.
RIB 12: Reloading *reloads gun*
Gordon: *shoots RIB 12* One down, eleven to go.
Case Cracker: *shoots 2 RIBs reloading* Got two. *hides behind mur for cover*
Jim: déplacer up *Goes towards RIB members*
RIB Members: *Running away*
Gordon: *Following Jim*
Case Cracker: *fires at RIB members, and follows the others*
All nine RIB's are hiding in a big room
Gordon: *Switches to grenade launcher* On my go, open that door. Ready?
Case Cracker: Yeah..
Case Cracker: *bucks the door down*
Gordon: *shoots grenade*
RIB Ponies: *Die*
Jim: Great work.
Gordon: Hold up. *Counting bodies* There's supposed to be nine here. One of them escaped.
Case Cracker: Shit man! That window is open. *points over to an open window* Hold on..*uses tracking magic, eyes glow* Yeah, one of them has been through here. *ends spell*
Gordon: Quick, back to the van! *Runs to van*
Jim: *Following Gordon*
RIB 5: *Riding Motorcycle away from warehouse*
Gordon: *Gets in driver's seat*
Jim: *Sits suivant to Gordon*
Gordon: *Turns car around for Case biscuit salé, craquelin to get in*
Case Cracker: *gets in the van*
Gordon: *Floors it*
Case Cracker: There he goes! *points at escaped RIB*
Gordon: I'm right behind him.
Jim: He's heading out of here.
Gordon: He's probably heading for the golden neigh bridge. *Getting close to biker*
RIB 5: *Passing traffic*
Gordon: Try, and shoot him.
Jim: *Shoots breaklight* I got one of the lights on his bike.
Gordon: Not good enough, keep trying.
Case Cracker: There's a lot of cars around. toi gotta get closer.
Jim: *Shoots tire on bike*
Case Cracker: ou not.
RIB 5: *Falls off bike*
Gordon: *stops van suivant to biker*
The trio got out of the van, and looked at the biker.
RIB 5: Wait a minute fellas-
Gordon: Fuck you. toi caused enough damage to us, and others for too long.
RIB 5: It wasn't my decision. I had to do all that shit.
Jim: Yeah whatever. *Looks down river* Case, throw this bastard off the bridge.
Case Cracker: *Nods, and picks up the biker* You've done too much to us already. So.. *Walks towards the edge of the bridge* Arrivederci! *Throws the RIB off the bridge*
RIB 5: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! *Lands on boat*
Gordon: Good timing.
Jim: Yeah, but now we got another problem. The cops are gonna ask us a shitload of questions. We better skip town for a while.
Case Cracker: Yeah, but this'll blow over soon enough.
Gordon: How long are we skipping town for?
Jim: Four years. That should be enough time for the cops to forget about everything. Now, get to your houses quickly. Take anything that toi think is neccesary, and we'll get moving.
Gordon: Right. *Stands in middle of highway*
Gordon: *Pulls mare out of car* Thank's a lot *Steals car*
Jim: Case, you, and me are taking the delivery van. This time, you're driving. *Sits in passenger seat*
Case Cracker: *gets in the drivers seat* Alright. *drives towards his house*
Jim: After we get to your house, toi can just drop me off at the pizza place on Mane Ashbury. I can get a cab from there.
Case Cracker: If toi say so. *continues driving*
Jim: Where do toi plan on going when we skip town?
Case Cracker: Haven't decided yet. I'll just drive if I can't decide. Why? Where were toi plannin' on goin'?
Jim: St. Foalis. I've got a daughter that lives there. It would be nice to visit my daughter after being in this town, and not seeing her for years. Her name is Millie.
Case Cracker: Oh, toi know how Millie's been?
Jim: No. She hasn't sent me any messages in months.
Case Cracker: Hm. I've got my sister in Fillydelphia. Maybe I'll make my way over to her.
Jim: Okay. We're at your house.
Case Cracker: *Stops van*
Jim: Get what toi need, then take me to Mane Ashbury.
Case Cracker: K I'll be right back. *goes inside his house*
Jim: *Waits in van*
Case Cracker: *leaves his house carrying a few suitcases and puts them in the van*
Jim: Alright Case, now get me to the Pizzeria on Mane Ashbury.
Case Cracker: *gets in driver's seat* Ok. *drives to Mane Ashbury*
Jim: I just want toi to know something. If we never see each other again, I want toi to know that you're one of the most loyal ponies I've ever met.
CC: Thanks. I don't know if our paths will traverser, croix again, but I know we got each others backs. Just don't get yourself into anything toi can't get yourself out of. *Arrives at Mane Ashbury*
Jim: Thanks a lot Case. *gets out* And good luck.
Case Cracker: Good luck. *drives away*
Taxi driver: *Stops*
Jim: *Gets in* Airport, now!
Taxi Driver: *Goes to airport*
Gordon went north into Vanhoover, and Jim made it to St. Foalis.
Characters used for fanfic
Gordon from SeanTheHedgehog
Case biscuit salé, craquelin from IzfanKirby
Jim from SeanTheHedgehog
Anthony from SeanTheHedgehog
Erica from SeanTheHedgehog