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 The loup clan was kinda awesome, except for the crappy animation and the fact that they're allergic to shirts.
The wolf clan was kinda awesome, except for the crappy animation and the fact that they're allergic to shirts.
Okay, I'll admit that I haven't laughed this hard at a film since I saw The Hangover last summer. Seriously, what was the plot here? I actually found the first film to be much better than this travesty. toi can find my review of the first movie link. I'll go through it like I do with all movies. Pros and cons, then an overall.

Pros

The Volturi

Finally! Some ACTUAL vampires!! The Volturi I found were pretty awesome because, toi know, they actually were cruel, soulless, mean, and did some actual VAMPIRING. The part towards the end where a tour group of humans is led directly to them and toi hear their screams was pretty awesome. Come on people, that's what vampires do. They drink the blood of huuumans. Sheesh. Also, they were pretty cruel too, what with the whole claque, smack down of Edward and nearly killing Bella (so bummed that didn't happen). Getting a small glimpse of the actor who will be playing Grindelwald in Deathly Hallows was a nice bonus too. So for all toi Twilight fans, the Volturi are GOOD examples of vampires. Much like the soulless vampires on Buffy.

The loup Clan

Now why I didn't particularly enjoy the crappy computer animation of the loups (more on that later) I did enjoy the characters of the loup clan. The one scene that I really liked is where we see Sam's fiance, with half her face clawed up. My friend and I definitely agree that even with the claw marks she was amazingly beautiful. I would see a movie about her and Sam in a heartbeat. It would be much much better than this terrible film. Pity they were stuck in it.

Jacob

Lautner got hot. No denying that. Other than the hotness factor though, he was probably the only real character with any dimensions and depth besides Bella's father. The way their relationship built to where Jacob fell for Bella, and she pretty much for him, was very realistic and healthy. So toi can imagine my dissappointment when she chose Edward, who abandoned, controlled, and basically led to much of her depression, over Jacob. toi Team Jacob fans, I now consider toi semi-sane because toi recognized a HEALTHY relationship. hommages to toi guys.


Cons

Bella...you there?

I hate the character of Bella, I truly do. She doesn't think for herself, is defined solely par her relationships, and for some reason Stewart could NEVER SHUT HER MOUTH. Even when she wasn't talking!! What was up with that?! Gaah. The fact too that she dissed her Friends at school and put her dad through so much crap with the screaming at night (seriously, wtf, she doesn't have PTSD) made me just loathe her character even plus with a passion. Furthermore, her whole obsession over age was just ridiculous. Ohhh nooo you're a whole an older than your 107 an old vampire boyfriend!! Now he's not going to l’amour toi anymore!!! Yea, stupid. Those fans out there that idolize her, please find a healthier role model such as Eowyn, Hermione, heck even Lily on How I Met Your Mother. Bella is a very unhealthy and psychologically unstable character and is an insult to females everywhere. She didn't even drive her own car most of the time! Disgusting.

How is she special too btw?

If someone can explain how Bella is unaffected par any of the vampire's powers, it'd be much appreciated. That just seems like something that's just thrown out there. My theory? It's because Bella has no thoughts!

Edward...dude wtf?!

Sooo this guy that supposedly is totally in l’amour with toi throws toi into a glass table, tableau for protection, lies to you, breaks up with you, and abandons toi in the forest. A car ride accueil would have been nice plskthnx. Also, the throwing into the glass table, tableau for her protection? That was totally safe. toi know, because she was bleeding even plus profusely after the table, tableau than she was after the papercut. Also, who has ever bled that much after a papercut anyways, if at all? Furthermore, the fact that he kept "appearing" everytime Bella had an adrenaline rush was just weird. I think if my ex-boyfriend started montrer up everytime I had a rush, I'd go and get a CT of my brain to make sure I didn't have a brain tumor a la Izzie seeing Denny b/c of her tumor. Also, the fact that Bella takes him right back after all the crap he put her through was just great. Really shows girls that hey, after a guy lies to toi like that toi can totally trust him again with no really good explanation other than "I l’amour you". Nice.

OMG a Plot Point!!!

Annd what was the plot?? Everytime a possible plot point appeared it seemed to get derailed, such as the shots of Victoria, Laurent, ou whenever anyone a dit Bella was jouer la comédie crazy. If anyone spoke reason ou a plot point appeared, it did not montrer again.

Lupin's loup Looked Better...

The film must have had the world's worst computer animation department because those loups were a travesty. How about those transf...I mean FURSPLOSIONS eh? Really bad animation coupled with a laughable transformation sequence (FURSPLODE!) led to even plus laughs. Too bad there weren't enough fursplosions.

That's What She Said!

There were way too many lines in the film where one could easily say that. For example- Bella: I'm coming! Me: That's what she said! Edward: I don't want toi to come! Me: That's what HE said!! If toi don't get the meaning behind that, then please go watch The Office where it is regularly utilized. Furthermore, the scene where Edward kisses Bella in front of her truck after the party was too funny. Edward acted like...well like link SNL skit. Please be forewarned that that link is meant for those 16 and older. That scene probably got one of the biggest laughs out of me.

Blocked

Finally, all the kiss-blocking that poor Jacob suffered through. Face coup de poing high school guy who threw up at an action movie (he's so gay then), Bella denies, and Edward calls just as he macks on the upper lip! Seriously, Jacob should have just pulled an Owen (Grey's Anatomy character), grabbed Bella, and just rocked her world. Doubt she woulda left if he did that.


Overall

Overall, this movie was a travesty to the film community. It was plotless, very poorly acted, and featured a very unhealthy set of characters that girls and women alike should not look up to as role models. Bella should have been thrown in a psych center for the stuff she was experiencing. I'm not going to apologize either if I've offended anyone. This is my honest opinion, and I know I wasn't as kind as I was in my first review. Now you've heard an opinion of an anti-Twilighter. toi Team Jacobers, toi got some respect from me now. Please save your brain cells and your money and do not see this movie. Unless toi want a really good laugh then par all means do. Oh and one plus thing to note. The ending with the whole Marry me? Ending on the *gasp* garnered a huge laugh from our audience. And just for my own satisfaction, FURSPLODE TIME!!
 No plot and many opportunities for "That's what she said!" abound in this film. Also, Edward during this Kiss is very reminiscent of a certain SNL skit.
No plot and many opportunities for "That's what she said!" abound in this film. Also, Edward during this kiss is very reminiscent of a certain SNL skit.
 Poor Jacob kept getting blocked and denied. In the end, Bella chooses the unhealthy relationship with Edward based on looks rather than the healthy one with Jacob based on the initial strong friendship.
Poor Jacob kept getting blocked and denied. In the end, Bella chooses the unhealthy relationship with Edward based on looks rather than the healthy one with Jacob based on the initial strong friendship.
posted by just_bella
I swore up and down that I wasn't going to write any stories tonight. I thought I should take a night off...and well, here I am...sad huh? :)
Just kidding, thanks for the support!!!

Remember when:

"Mr. and Mrs. Brandon I would like to speek with toi in private. Susan, could toi please take the girls out to the pond, ou the maze while I speak to their parents." He asked the receptionist.

"Yes Dr. G." Susan a dit

She reached her hands out so that we could take her hands, I wasn't sure I wanted to this but Cynthia grabbed on right away and I knew I had to go to protect her if nothing else.

Oh no,...
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it's a long and last one for today, i'm almost heading to lit ENJOY oh btw it's from bella's pov so toi don't hear much of the fight, but I will mention it later about what happened to those witches.

Bella's pov

I knew from where they were coming so I had to take the same path otherwise I would miss them and they would still go after my family.
I started running thru the forest as fast I could till I was at this open field. I stopped I could smell there sent now, they were getting closer. I was glad I hunted before with Edward so I wouldn’t be weak but instead allot stronger.
I took a deep breath....
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Warning: This is just my fantaisie coming through. And some information to you; the story plays before Bella became a Vampire and there is no Nessie in sight. So its just for our little Jacob's sake, he needs some luving.

A new kind of Life...
Again i woke up to that awful smell, it burnt in my nose and made me shiver. It had been a weird week, and i still wasnt used to my life the way it was right now. I had moved into the Cullen house, not having any other place to go anyhow. LaPush was a no go, Sam had all the ways to make me stay away from Kristine.- but so far he didnt try. Then again i hadnt...
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posted by just_bella
salut guys, here's the suivant chapter. I'm not sure if i will continue this one much longer...unless I do a rose and emmett story. Sorry I didn't get this up last night, but here ya go.
--------------------------------------------------
Recap:

I passed in and out of conciousness, trying to hold on like I had promised her. I remember one point where she stopped and put me down on the herbe and I came too.

The surrounds were diffrent, it looked like we were just out side a town. The strange thing was that it was unlike any town that I had ever seen. There were many buildings that I could see from this...
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enjoy, sorry for any mistakes again

Bella's pov

We both got up and I grabbed Mason in my arms and walked towards the car with Edward and Alice following behind me.
I suddenly heard Alice “there really attached to each other” and I looked at her and she smiled and I gave her a smile back and than looked at Mason. He was doing it again, letting me read other peoples thoughts , I was lire Alice her mind. Then I heard Edward “I hope this wouldn’t effect anything tonight otherwise I’m getting mason back” I giggled a little hearing him think that. Now I know how Edward feels when he reads...
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posted by _madz_
im sorry i took so long but i wont bore toi with excuses. i know this is very short but i didnt want to leave toi guys hanging.the suivant one should be longer :)

Bella must have felt me hesitating. Her beautiful face looked up at me, her gorgeous, melting chocolat brown eyes shining, even though she was faint from exhaustion. The crease between her eyebrows showed that she was slightly irritated. I wanted to raise my finger to her brow and smooth it out, but before I got the chance, Bella started talking.
“Please, Edward.” She whispered, the words slurred together.
Anything, I wanted to say,...
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posted by Twi-Freak14
"Alice!!!! Please I am capable of making my own decisions on what I'm going to wear!" I half shouted as Alice walked into the closet and started picking through my clothes, completely oblivious that I was there, that ou she was just ignoring me.
I grabbed the aqua blue sweater from the rack, right suivant to the lacy black short sleeve chemise and jean jupe that Alice was planning on making me wear.
"So... Bella, I was thinking, toi know Nessie's birthday is coming up soon, and I would l’amour your help on picking out what to get her."
"I'm sure toi can already see what I am going to get her so no...
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posted by twilight-7
I think this one is a bit crap but that's for toi guys to decide. I just wanted another try at Edward's POV. It starts out in Kayla's POV first.

Kayla’s POV


How the hell did he find out? I had not a dit anything and neither had Edward ou Jacob. Well, I don’t know about their thoughts. I’m not really paying attention to Edward’s since I’m trying to find the bracelet and Jacob never a dit anything at all to Charlie the past week.
How does he know? I asked Edward.
I may have accidentally thought something, Edward replied.
Accidentally?
You were over reacting about the bracelet and I thought...
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posted by iluvtwilight123
" OH, my god! Trenton your a vampire!" I shouted but really i didnt care, my best friend is a vampire instead of human and i never saw it coming. "Well yeah I didnt want to tell toi until I explained it but i couldnt keep my eyes shut any more." He a dit it so casually it almost frightened me. I couldnt believe it was all happening in one jour and not just any day-my birthday. From drama with Jacob, to making up and kissing, then having a bad dream, to finding out that i had the flu where it is suppose to eat myself alive, and to haut, retour au début it all off my friend is here telling me that he is a vampire!...
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posted by misjones39
I have began to write a story of my own. Ive had quite a few people tell me they absolutely l’amour it so far. Its about this girl named Lilly, who I have made Paul's sister. I mean everyone knows Stephenie never gave Paul a sister, but i decided too. She moved away from La push after there mother dies, but has been brought back par the pack because of her fate. She has no idea whats in store for her. Than she falls in l’amour with Jacob. (considering they grew up together its akward, but undenying love.) THIS IS MY STORY FOR THOSE WHO ARE JACOB LOVERS. and what would have happened if he never imprinted...
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I'll try to put another one later today :D ENJOY!!!

Bella's POV

When we finally got accueil from our evening courses, we saw Jake and Renesmee sleeping in the couch. Edward grabbed her very gentile and took her to her bedroom. I followed him and kissed Renesmee on the forehead and whispered: “Sweet dreams, angel”
Edward gave Renesmee a quick Kiss on the forehead too and we left the room.
Edward looked at Jake and a dit to me
“Are toi going to wake him up”
“No, let him sleep, it’s only 4 hours till the sun comes up again” I whispered to Edward.
“We could go visit Alice and the others”,...
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posted by ktbminnie12
You're in for a real treat!!!!

Bella’s POV

    It’s been 4 months. I’m still sitting in this dark basement, alone and scarred. I missed Edward so much. I hope they find me soon. I don’t know how much plus of the beatings I could take.
    Every night, Lorenzo would come in and beat me until I passed out. I don’t know why he did it. I didn’t do anything to him. One night he beat me so hard, I started bleeding. I could feel the marks on my arms where he beat me so hard.
    Three days ago, I asked him to leave me alone. Actually,...
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posted by dinosteph
I'm just gonna make a point here. Something I wanted to share with everyone haha.

I just reread eclipse.
I paid close attention to Jacob and Bella's relationship.
Especially the morning after they spend the night in the tent.
Bella asks Jake to Kiss her, trying to prove a point.
The last couple chapters opened my eyes to their relationship completely.
I l’amour Edward, and I l’amour Jake.
I can see that Bella loves both of them. It breaks my cœur, coeur that she had to choose.

I'm just sayin.
<3


(Apparently this needs to be longer, otherwise I have to post it to the forum.)
posted by twilight-7
I landed hard on a cold leafy ground. I was lying in the middle of a forest. Great. I was flat on my back, having Lost my balance and fallen.
“Let me help toi up,” Mitchell’s soft voice spoke from above me. He was still standing.
“Don’t touch her!” Edward snarled. He was also standing. Was I the only one that fell?
Cold hands helped me to my feet. Edward looked me up and down, obviously checking for any damage.
“Are toi ok?” he whispered. “You’re not hurt?”
“I’m fine,” I assured him. “Or I will be in just a second.”
I turned around and glared at Mitchell. This boy...
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Friends Don't Let Friends Scoop Poop

Prologue

I knew what had to be done. I knew I would regret this. She was my best and only friend. I hope she wouldn’t regret any of this ou hate me at all. I just don’t want her to have this job and no home, but I wasn’t sure if I could live with a human in my house. I looked into her eyes to think of a way to word this. I opened my mouth and it all blurted out, “ Erin, I’m a vampire.”


Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight though I dearly wish I did but it belongs to the awesome Stephenie Meyer
posted by lovealice
Ok I've never written anything before, this is my first shot and if no one likes it it may be my last. I want to write between Eclipse and Breaking Dawn from Edwards perspective.
A lot of the first chapter is taken from the end of Eclipse, just to set the tone for the rest.

Chapter 1:
Remembering the happy day
--------------------------------------------------

I sat on the canapé in my bedroom thinking back on the jour that Bella finally agreed to marrying me. We were in the meadow relaxing when I realized that she was just doing everything for everyone else. She wasn't thinking about herself like...
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posted by CharmedVamp101
She stirred. Finally her eyes opened, I could see the ocean in her deep blue eyes. Crystal clear.
"Where am I,"she asked in a delicate soprano voice.
"General Hospital," I answered her.
"Who are you?"
"My name isn't important, but I'll tell toi that my first name is Edward."
"Why am I here?"
"I found toi nearly beaten to death in alley. I brought toi here. Your right radius is broken in three places, but I think you'll be able to go accueil soon."
"Are toi an angel?"
"Hardly," I couldn't let these words get to me, couldn't let them remind me of the one I lost.
"You're very handsome, and you're...
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posted by just_bella
I've spent a few days trying to figure out where I wanted this to go, I hope this works.

"I agree Alice, just remember that this can not change who toi are now, unless toi allow it. Call if toi need us." Carlisle a dit as he touched my head and walked out the door.

"I'm scared Jazz." I whispered as I leaned my head on his shoulder.

"We will do this together love, unless toi want to be alone." He a dit as he gave me options that he knew I would not take.

"Please stay." I a dit as I took the book in my hands and opened the journal.

The first entry was short, but what was strange about it, was that...
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posted by ktbminnie12
Edward's POV

*30 minutes later*
“So what does this mean, Alice?” I asked.
“I don’t know. Let’s just go back downstairs and see if the loups are here. Maybe that’s why I can’t see the party. If anything new happens, then I’ll let toi know. I promise,” she a dit heading out the door.
    The whole family was gathered in Carlisle’s study, talking about the sudden disappearance of the party.
“Okay,” I said. I headed down the stairs. The first thing I did was look for Bella. I got down to where I left her. She wasn’t there. I walked to the cuisine to see...
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According to Twilighters Italia & Lion Lamb:

New Moon will not be shot in Volterra but in Montepulciano
Despite advertisements, anticipations and every kind of proposal from the major and the township, New Moon will be shot in Montepulciano because the locations are "more beautiful for the movie" than Volterra."

And, they were nice enough to post pictures of possible locations in Montepulciano. Although the movie may not be filmed in Volterra, these locations look accurate to the descriptions in the book.
 The Plaza
The Plaza
 The alley
The alley