it's hard to deny what was a dit at the very beginning of the pilot -- this is his story. Elena will probably choose Damon at the end of the season, and she may choose Damon forever, but this has always felt like Stefan's story.
At this point, I need Stefan and, most importantly, Damon to get genuinely angry at her. There has to be follow-through when she hurts someone, just as there's follow through when someone else disappoints her.
Katherine was very Elena-like before she vamped out, with her whole "Yay, love! I believe! papillons are pretty!" thing happening here. I do appreciate that even then, she wasn't psyched about settling for a guy who would ditch her for bar fights.