To see the three main characters, and their car, go to this link: link

St. Foallis Maresourri, 1996

The three characters in the link above were driving a 1994 Caprice car down a road at 2 in the morning. They were all tired, and wanted to go to bed.

Bob: Ah hell. Give me plus booze before we do anything like this again.
Lewis: Okay.
Mare: *Talking on the radio* Attention all units, 211 in progress-
Lewis: What the hell is this?
Bob: A robbery at this time of night?
Shawn: What the hell is going on?
Lewis: Shh!
Mare: -Suspect is inside the bank, witnesses believe the suspect's name is Benjamin Guarino.
Bob: No!
Shawn: We just put him in jail.
Bob: Now we're gonna send him to hell!

Outside of the bank.

Lewis: Wait for him. No other cops are around. Lay low, he won't see us.
Benjamin: *Steps out of the bank*
Shawn: *Runs out of the car* BEN!!!
Benjamin: *Running*
Shawn: *Catches him, and slams his head into a mur five times* You're supposed to be in jail!! *Pushes him onto the sidewalk, and grabs a Walther. He shoots seven bullets into Benjamin's head*
Lewis: *Watching Shawn drag Ben back to the car. Everything pauses in place as he begins to narrate*

As far as I can remember, I always wanted to be a cop.


Everything turns to black for the opening credits

SeanTheHedgehog Presents

In Association With Jade_23

A WindWakerGuy430 fan Fiction

The Cops

Starring SeanTheHedgehog's Tony Wineglass as Lewis Lee
WindWakerGuy430's Chimney Sweep as Bob Stone
SeanTheHedgehog's Sam Phillips as Shawn Baldwin
Octavia Melody as Mackenzie
Jade_23's Nikki West as Edwina Warbucks
And featuring two new OC's Benjamin Guarino, and Leonard Plesance

Since I was born in 1963, I had the interest of being a cop. I saw them on TV, saving ponies from danger, and that's what got me interested.


Glasgow Village, St. Foalis, 1981

Lewis: *Running out of his house*

I'd spend most of my time in Summer, running around town, trying to find these two detectives. My family lived in the Northern section of town, just suivant to Interstate 270, near Chouteau Island. I just graduated from Riverview Gardens High School, and even though my parents wanted me to go to College, I had something else in mind.

Lewis: *Sees Leonard in his car* Hi Leonard.
Leonard: Lewis, come on in.
Lewis: *Gets in the back seat*

Leonard, and his partner Peter always enjoyed having me around. It wasn't hard to find them. I had to look around for a white Chrysler, get in, and rejoindre them on whatever job their commissioner had them do. Whether it was stakeouts, ou patrols, the three of us made a great team. They even taught me a lot.

Leonard: All right, what's an 11-82?
Lewis: An accident with no injuries.
Leonard: Hell yeah!
Peter: This guy has brains!
Leonard: We'd be nowhere without you.

And it was fun too. I mean, I just graduated from High School, and hear I am with these two detectives, as if I'm like one of them. I remember tons of good memories sitting there with them in their Chrysler, and we busted a lot of ponies together.

But when I told my parents the news, this happened.

Stop the song

Lewis: *Walks into his dad's room*
Dad: *Using a typewriter* What do toi want?
Lewis: Well, uh-
Dad: Are toi just going to stand there like a retard, ou are toi going to say something? What the hell do toi want?
Lewis: I'm not interested in going to College.
Dad: What?
Lewis: I want to be a police officer.
Dad: No! Absolutely not! Go to your room right now! You're grounded!!

Everything pauses in place as Lewis begins to narrate again

He grounded me for two whole weeks. I wasn't allowed to do anything. I couldn't read a book, I couldn't open a window, hell I couldn't even get out of my bed. That's how bad it was. When I was ungrounded, I told Leonard what happened.

Leonard: Lewis, where the hell have toi been? We missed you, and three suspects got away from us since toi weren't here.
Lewis: My dad grounded me, because I told him I wanted to be a cop. I'm sorry guys, but I can't be with toi anymore.
Leonard: Sure toi can. Let me deal with him.


Dad: *Mowing the lawn*
Leonard: *Stops his car near Lewis' dad, and gets out* Mr. Lee? I want to talk to you.
Dad: *Turns off the lawnmower, and runs away*
Leonard: *Flies, and lands in front of Lewis' dad* I don't think so. toi try to run away from an officer again, you'll be arrested. toi haven't broken the law, but your son wants to be with us. If being a cop is what he wants, toi let him have it. Understand?
Dad: I'll kill that worthless bastard.
Leonard: That's it. You're under arrest.
Lewis: *Watching from inside the house*

My dad threatened to kill me, and that was enough for Leonard, and Peter to arrest him. He got three years in jail, and mom kicked me out of the house. Along with everything I owned. So Leonard allowed me to stay with him.

Song: link

Lewis: *Walks into the house after riding his bicycle*
Leonard: Come on Lewis, we gotta get going.
Lewis: *Follows Leonard out of the house*

We were busy, but I liked that. The busier we were, the happier I became. We started arresting ponies for bootlegging alcohol, from Chicagoat. When we started, I realized that I wasn't the only teenager that came to visit Leonard. There for the first time, I met Bob Stone. He had a great trick up his sleeve all the time to stop these guys.

Bob: *Walks up to bootleggers* How ya doing?
Bootlegger: Fine. What's it to you?
Bob: I wanna buy some beer, and, since I'm a nice pony, I'll pay toi twice the amount toi normally charge.
Bootlegger: Well, that sounds fine. *Gives Bob a bottle of beer*
Bob: *Gives Bootlegger ten dollars* What brand is this?
Bootlegger: Miller Light?
Bob: Why isn't the logo on this bottle?
Bootlegger: Well uh-
Bob: Did toi make this yourself?
Bootlegger: Oh shit.
Bob: We're good guys, come get him.
Leonard: *Runs out of the bushes with Peter* Okay buddy, you're under arrest. *Arresting the bootlegger*
Bob: *Takes his ten dollars back*
Lewis: *Walks up to Lewis* Nice to meet you.
Bob: Nice to meet toi too. Here. *Gives Lewis his ten dollars*
Lewis: Thank you.

Bob was very generous. He'd give toi a ten, ou a twenty just for saying hi to him.

Stop the song

A 1968 Dodge Monaco was going fast on a highway, leaving Illinois, and entering St. Foalis

Mare: *Talking on the radio* Any units available par Interstate 270, Illinois State Police reports a green Dodge Monaco has been stolen. Requesting Roadblock.
Leonard: Ten-4.

This was my very first Grand Theft Auto. I wanted it to be just right.

Leonard: *Stops on the bridge just in front of the exit* Okay, get out the spike strip, now!!
Lewis: *Rolls the spike strip*
Car Pony: *Drives over it, and loses control, hitting the barrier between the exit, and interstate*
Leonard: Bob, Shawn, go get him.

And here is where I met Shawn.

Shawn: Come on, come on. *Puts cuffs on Car Pony, and brings him towards Leonard with Bob* Here toi are Leonard.
Leonard: Thanks.

Everything pauses in place, and Lewis narrates

Shawn was great, and we worked well with Bob, Leonard, and Peter, but when the DA found out about him letting us work with them, he got a 1 mois probation, and was demoted to Captain.

Leonard: This is serious, we can't do this anymore.
Lewis: But I like doing this-
Leonard: I know, but I got my orders. toi can't go with us anymore. It's the same for Bob, and Shawn. As soon as the three of toi get in your 20's, rejoindre the academy, and they'll train toi to be officers. Then we can work together again.


Pony: *Riding a motorcycle between two cars*

Moto Europa Motorcycle Shop, St. Foalis, September 18, 1989

Ponies from New Mexico moved into our town to sell stolen motorcycles. They would also steal some from Moto Europa, so me, Shawn, and Bob were put there to work undercover. For each poney we arrested for stealing one of the motorcycles, we got an extra grand in our paycheck. The police department was paying us 20 grand a week, but some of us felt like we could use the extra cash.

Lewis & Shawn: *Standing in front of Bob's Pontiac*
Bob: *Arrives with a pony* Here's one. Lewis, toi wait here. Me, and Shawn will bring this guy in.
Shawn: Okay, it's my turn to be payed. *Gets in the car*
Bob: *Puts the poney in the back* What the hell are toi talking about?
Shawn: Don't we get turns?
Bob: Hell no. If toi want to make the extra money, toi make the arrests.
Lewis: *Walks to the right*
Bob: *Starts the car, and drives away*

We had two shifts, one that went from noon to 4, and a night shift, which went from 9 to 11. The night shifts were without a doubt harder. The darkness gave the suspects an easier time to take the motorcycles, without any of us noticing. Most of them got caught ten secondes after taking off with the motorcycle, but others got further.

Pony: *Laying on the ground bleeding after falling off of a motorcycle*
Bob: *Picks up the pony* Come on, you're under arrest.
Pony: Come on-
Bob: Don't fuck with me. I saw toi steal that bike.
Lewis: *Opens the back door*
Bob: In. *Shoves the poney into the car*

We didn't get weekends off, but we did have a lot of time to have fun between shifts. One of our favori places to go to was the 21st rue Brewers Bar. Their devise was bière & pizza in a cool smart setting, and they weren't lying. Every time we went there, we had the best pizza, and bière anypony could ask for, and Shawn had a blast with his "comedy night."

Stop the song

Shawn: *Drunk* Okay, so this stallion comes towards me in this big brown Chrysler, and nearly hits me as I traverser, croix the street. He calls me an idiot, and sticks his tongue out at me. After that, I tell him, go wash your car toi cunt! toi got a lot of shit all over it!
Lewis & Other Police Ponies: *Laughing*
Shawn: Then he pulls out this fake badge, and claims to be a cop. So I pull out my badge, and I tell him, I'm a real cop, and I can tell that toi got your badge at a yard sale!
Lewis & Other Police Ponies: *Laughing*
Shawn: Okay, let's go back to 1985, the last jour of academy. We were practicing at the shooting range, and I was reloading my gun. I was pointing it at the ground, and the Sargent told me it was dangerous, so I tell him this. How is it dangerous, if there are no bullets in the gun? Is a unicorn going to reload it for me?!
Lewis & Other Police Ponies: *Laughing*
Shawn: He actually believed me! There was no one with a horn on their head, and he believed me! He runs into his office, and cries like a baby-
Waiter: Excuse me sir, you're being too loud. Other ponies are complaining.
Shawn: *Pushes the waiter away* Fuck you! We're cops! We can be as loud as we want!!!!
Bob: He's right!
Lewis: *Laughing*
Shawn: What the hell are toi laughing about?
Lewis: You're just a funny pony, that's all.
Shawn: Funny how? toi think I amuse you?
Nearby Pony: *Listening to the conversation, and writes it down* This'll be perfect for Joe.
Shawn: What'll be perfect for Joe?! Get Lost toi cunt!
Lewis & Other Police Ponies: *Laughing*
Shawn: toi like that one? Let me tell toi this-
Waiter: Sir, you, and your Friends need to leave.
Shawn: Screw you! You're under arrest! *Arrests the waiter*
Bob: Oh, come on Shawn.
Police poney 96: You're going too far with this.
Police poney 465: How is Leonard gonna react to this?
Shawn: Let's find out together. All of us, let's go.
Waiter: toi didn't even pay for your beer, and pizza.
Shawn: Tell it to the judge.

The waiter from the bar is with Leonard in his office

Waiter: toi gotta do something about Shawn. He drinks too much, and makes our bar a living hell for everypony.
Leonard: Well Shawn tells me that you're the one making it bad for everyone.
Waiter: I don't do a fucking thing to him. He's the one that ruins our business. He was being too loud one night, so I tell him to be quiet, but he pushes me onto the ground. That's police brutality.
Leonard: I don't like to hear those two words. I'll make toi a deal. Shawn won't be at your bar anymore, but toi gotta pay me.
Waiter: Pay you? For what?
Leonard: If toi want Shawn out of your place, toi gotta keep every officer out, and they won't be happy about that. So toi gotta pay me to keep them out.


And that's what they did. At first, we were pissed, but when we got the extra money that the waiter gave to Leonard, we cheered up, and went to Vin De Set instead, which was right suivant to where we were kicked out. The nourriture was plus expensive, but for a good reason. It tasted much better than what they served at 21st Street.

What the waiter didn't know was that Leonard wasn't allowed to do what he was doing. The poor idiot kept scraping up as much money as he could to pay Leonard whatever he wanted to keep him happy, and that's not all. When Leonard wanted the money, he wanted it faster than a Japanese Bullet Train. Five months passed, and they didn't have enough money to satisfy Leonard, and I was shocked to hear what Leonard wanted me, and Shawn to do.

Shawn & Lewis: *Planting time bombs in the 21st rue Brewer Bar*

I was very shocked, but he a dit the bombs we were using were the same kind criminals used, and we'd plant it on some gang. I wasn't too sure it would work, but it did.

Lewis: *Waiting with Shawn in his car* I don't see how blowing this place up will solve anything.
Shawn: It's for them not paying us back.
Lewis: Yeah, but is it worth it?
Shawn: Hell yes. That reminds me, I need a favor.
Lewis: What?
Shawn: There's this mare I want to take on a date, but she won't go with me unless I get somepony to rendez-vous amoureux, date us with her friend.
Lewis: Are toi asking me to go on a double rendez-vous amoureux, date with you?
Shawn: And two mares. Her friend is British, and toi know how horny British mares are.
Lewis: I don't give a damn, I don't rendez-vous amoureux, date foreigners.
Shawn: Come on Lewis, help a fella out. You've barely done a fucking thing for me! The least toi could do is go on this rendez-vous amoureux, date with me.

Explosions were heard inside the bar, the feu alarm went on, and smoke was seen coming out of the windows.

Shawn: Oh shit!!
Lewis: toi see what toi just did? We stayed here too long because of you! *Starts the car, and drives away*
Shawn: Because of me?! Who's the one driving here?

Vin De Set, where Lewis meets Mackenzie

Shawn: *Walks in with Mackenzie, and another mare* Let's take this table. *Sits down with Mackenzie, and the other mare*
Mackenzie: Where's your friend?
Shawn: He's coming, just wait. *Sees Lewis* There he is.
Lewis: *Sits down*
Shawn: Lewis, this is the mare I was telling toi about, Mackenzie. Say hi to each other.
Lewis: Hello Mackenzie.
Mackenzie: Hello Lewis.
Waiter: *Arrives* What'll toi have?

We just stared at each other. Except for when the waiter was taking our orders. Mackenzie looked very beautiful, and my cœur, coeur was pounding ten times a second. Shawn a dit I was doing him a favor, but to me, it felt like he did me a favor.

Shawn: *Gets into his brand new firebird with his mare* See toi two later.
Lewis: Yeah, toi got it.
Shawn: *Drives away*
Lewis: That was a nice dinner. What do toi want to do next?


Four days later

Lewis: *Gets out of his car* toi ready?
Mackenzie: Always.
Lewis: *Crosses the rue with Mackenzie*

Half a week since we met, me, and Mackenzie wanted to get married. We went out to Vin De Set to meet up with Shawn, and Bob, and make the arrangements.

Lewis: *Goes to the front entrance*
Ponies: Hey, we have a line here.
Lewis: *Gets out his police badge, and shows it to the guard*
Guard: Go on in.
Lewis: *Walks in with Mackenzie*
Mackenzie: Where are we going to sit?
Lewis: Over there.
Mackenzie: But there's no table.
Waiters: *Setting up a table*
Lewis: There is now.
Waiters: *Walks over to Lewis* Lewis, we got your table, tableau set up for you. Go on, and have a good time.
Lewis: Thanks. *Goes with Mackenzie to the table*
Bob: *Arrives with Shawn* salut guys.
Shawn: Good to see you.
Lewis: Alright, so what's the plan?

Stop the song

suivant day, at Moto Europa

poney 55: *Walking towards a motorcycle with a toolbox*
poney 63: *Taking money out of the cash register*
poney 70: *Taking another motorcycle*
Bob: *Drives towards Moto Europa with Lewis, and Shawn in his car*
poney 55: *Sees the car*
Bob: *Stops near the pony*
Lewis & Shawn: *Run out* Police! toi three are underarrest!
poney 55: *Runs away*
Bob: *Tackles him, and arrests him*
Lewis & Shawn: *Have the other ponies trapped inside*
Lewis: I want toi to come towards us very slowly.
poney 63: Fuck no.
poney 70: We're not going anywhere.
Shawn: *Grabs his gun* Get the hell over here! *Shoots poney 70 in his chest*
poney 63: Whoa!!
Lewis: Get over here right now!
Shawn: Come on! Let's go!
poney 63: *Walks over*
Lewis: *Arrests the pony*
Bob: We need transport for one suspect.
Shawn: *Arrives with Lewis, and the suspect*
Bob: Where's the other guy?
Lewis: Shawn shot him.
Bob: Goddammit Shawn, how many times do I have to tell toi not to do that?
Shawn: What the hell did toi want me to do? Let him go?
Bob: Get an ambulance over here for a dead pony. Code 60.

Code 60 was something we made up. Officers are not supposed to shoot any suspects, unless they shoot at toi first, but Shawn would do it anyway. Code 60 was our way of saying Shawn screwed up.

The marriage took place at my house.

poney 27: *Playing the organ*
Lewis: *Wearing a tuxedo, as he walks with Mackenzie*
Mackenzie: *Wearing a white wedding dress*
Bob: *Watching the wedding as he sits suivant to Shawn*
Shawn: I just hope that reverend doesn't mention Celestia.
Bob: Shawn, it's a religious thing, he has to mention her.
Shawn: Celestia's overrated. Religious assholes treat her like the fucking president.
poney 27: *Stops playing the organ, as Lewis, and Mackenzie are in position*
Reverend: Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today, for the marriage of Lewis Lee, and Mackenzie White. Will toi take this mare to be your lawfully wedded wife?
Lewis: I do.
Reverend: And Mackenzie, will toi take this stallion, to be your lawfully wedded husband?
Mackenzie: Yes, I do.
Reverend: I now pronounce you, husband, and wife. toi may kiss-
Mackenzie: *Pushes Lewis onto the ground, and has sex with him*
Reverend:... the bride.

Everything pauses in place as Lewis narrates

If toi think I'm making this up, I'm not. As soon as we were married, we got it on right there, in front of fifty ponies. Shawn wasn't exaggerating when he told me that British mares were horny, and they still are today.

We had a happy life in the early 90's. I sold my précédant car, and bought a brand new Town Car. I also sold my house, which got me $67,000. plus than enough to pay the mortgage for Mackenzie's house. Everything was great, but a couple of years later, this happened.

Bob: *Walks into a Wal-Mart*

On a TV being sold, a commercial was being played, and on the commercial, was a poney named Kyle.

Kyle: I have thousands of films for toi to rent. VHS, Laser disc, we got 'em both! Action, Comedy, Romance, what grabs your interest?Here, at Kyle's Video Store, we got it all. So come on down, and rent a movie!
Bob: *Spots Kyle in the TV section* There toi are Kyle. Watching your own commercial?
Kyle: Oh Bob, so good to see you. toi owe me twenty bucks.
Bob: Twenty bucks? What for?
Kyle: For the Laser disc toi rented.
Bob: Kyle, I only had it for twenty minutes. toi a dit there was no charge if I had it for less than 24 hours.
Kyle: Yeah, but there's a scratch on it.
Bob: The scratch was already there when toi gave it to me. *Gets his walkie talkie* Lewis, Orion, come to my location ASAP.
Lewis: *Arrives with Orion*
Kyle: What is this?
Bob: We're police officers. Now, would toi like to explain to me again, how I owe toi twenty bucks, for a movie I rented, less than 24 hours ago?
Mare: *Talking on Lewis' radio* Officer Lee, please report, over.
Lewis: *Gets his walkie talkie* Lewis Lee reporting.
Mare: Your wife has an urgent message for you.
Mackenzie: Darling, I need your help!
Lewis: Okay, what's the matter?
Mackenzie: Our neighbor across the rue tried to sell me drugs. I told them no, but they forced me to take them, it was horrible!
Lewis: Okay, where are you?
Mackenzie: In the house.
Lewis: Do toi feel okay, do toi want to go to the hospital?
Mackenzie: I'm fine, but I'll feel better when toi arrest those guys.
Lewis: Okay, I'm coming over. Bob, I gotta go.
Bob: Okay.
Lewis: *Leaves*

The neighbor lived par himself, but today, he had two Friends with him, modifying a 1955 Chevrolet Bel Air.

Lewis: *Drifts left as he gets on his street, then screeches to a stop in front of his house. He gets out, and walks quickly to the neighbor*
Neighbor: With driving like that you'll get arrested.
Lewis: *Slams the neighbor's head onto the car*
Neighbor: Ow!!
Lewis: You're getting arrested friend! *Pushes him onto the ground, and kicks him four times* toi know that mare toi gave the drugs to? That was my wife! *Puts hoofcuffs on the neighbor* And I.. *Shows his police badge* a police officer.
Neighbor: Oh fuck.. *Looks at the house across the street* Mackenzie!!! toi slut!!! ONLY SLUTS ARE MARRIED TO POLICE PONIES!!!
Lewis: *Hits the neighbor* Shut up. *Walks him to the car*

As soon as he got out of jail twenty years later, he moved into St. Paul, Minnesota.


Lewis: *In lit with Mackenzie at night. They're both watching Die Hard*
Mackenzie: *Hears a noise from the floor below them* Did toi hear that?
Lewis: Somepony is downstairs. Wait here. *Leaves the bed, as he grabs a gun. He leaves the room, and goes downstairs*
Mackenzie: Be careful.
Lewis: *Goes downstairs, and sees four crooks wearing all black, including face masks. They're taking money out of a wallet* Freeze, SFPD!!
Crook: *Shoots Lewis with a tranquilizer*
Lewis: *Falls onto the ground*
Crooks: *Go upstairs*
Mackenzie: Lewis? *Gets out of the bed*
Crook 4: *Shoots Mackenzie*
Mackenzie: *Falls down, and dies*

It was a short live marriage, only going on for two years. The tranquilizer kept me asleep for twelve hours. I never did find those crooks, but I heard they went up into North Dakota, and got arrested there. They killed seven cops, thirty two civilians, and a volé, étole over $800,000.

After Mackenzie was killed, I met another poney named Andy. He was a few bucks short of buying a house, so I invited him to live with me. We opened up a new bar called The Silver Ballroom. Andy would manage it from Mondays to Fridays, and I would manage it on the weekends. After Mackenzie's death, Leonard thought it would be best for me to take weekends off.

Song (Start at 1:45):

Bob, and Shawn envied me getting the weekends off, but as soon as their shift ended, they would come right down, and we would have a blast. The Silver Ballroom was such a populaire joint, that I ended up making at least ten grand a day. The pinball games really came in handy.

Song (Start at 0:42):

Bob & Shawn: *Walk into The Silver Ballroom*
Lewis: salut fellas, what'll toi have?
Shawn: The usual.
Bob: *Looks at the high score on one of the pinball games* 900,710 is an easy score to beat.
Lewis: Well, good luck with that.

I set that high score, and nopony has beaten it ever since. Having Andy live with me was cool. The money we earned from our bar, and my job as a police officer, allowed us to throw parties at least once a month. Andy had everything planned, and it was always a success. To haut, retour au début it all off, he did all of the house work, cleaning everything, and making sure it was all tidy. He treated himself like the butler. I told him it wasn't necessary, but he disagreed.

Stop the song

Lewis: toi know Andy, toi don't have to do all of the work around the house all of the time. I can do it too if you'd like.
Andy: Nah, that's okay. I don't have much to do around here on the weekends, so I might as well do what I do best.
Lewis: Okay. If it's what toi want to do, I'm fine with that. *Goes upstairs*


The Silver Ballroom

Bevo, St. Foalis, July 9, 1996

It was 1 in the morning. Lewis, and Bob were sitting suivant to each other at one end of the bar, and Benjamin Guarino was at the other end, with four of his friends.

Benjamin: Hey, how are toi two doing over there?
Lewis: Fine, fine.
Benjamin: Drinks all around.
Bartender: *Preparing drinks*
Benjamin: We're getting close to the end of the 20th Century. Let's enjoy it while it lasts!
Lewis: Yeah, the 21st Century is only a few years away.
Bartender: *Gives everypony their drinks*
Benjamin: Enjoy the drinks fellas!
Bob: Yeah, haut, retour au début of the morning to toi too. *Drinks*
Shawn: *Arrives with a black stallion* salut guys, this is my friend, Fred, visiting from Chicagoat. He's looking for a job here.
Lewis: I think we can find him a job.
Benjamin: Shawn? Shawn Baldwin? Is that you?
Shawn: Oh Jésus Christ, not this guy.
Benjamin: Shawn, come on over here!
Shawn: Okay, guys wait here for me, I gotta talk to him. *Walks to Benjamin* salut Benny.
Benjamin: *Hugs Shawn* So good to see toi again.
Shawn: Alright, alright, take it easy. You're gonna break every bone in my body.
Benjamin: *Lets go* toi seem a little uptight.
Shawn: Yeah, because toi hug me like toi wanna kill me.
Benjamin: I do not. I haven't seen toi in six years. toi think that gives me the right to hug a friend I haven't seen so long?
Shawn: Where did toi go?
Benjamin: Business trip to Seoul. It was a blast, they gave me a billion dollars. When are toi going to make that much money being a police pony?
Shawn: Benjamin, the money I make is none of your business. Maybe toi like montrer off the cash toi get, but the money I make is personal.
Benjamin: Okay, okay, take it easy. If it bothers toi that much, we don't have to talk about it.
Shawn: Good.
Lewis: salut I'm gonna change the song on the jukebox.
Bob: Okay.
Lewis: *Goes to the jukebox*
Benjamin: I just thought you'd like to stop living like a bum, and be rich like me.
Shawn: *Smashes a glass on the counter* WHAT THE HELL IS YOUR PROBLEM?!!?!
Lewis: *Turns off the song*
Shawn: I'm gonna coup de poing that damn smile off of your face, and shoot your brains out!!
Benjamin: I'd like to see toi try. Remember, I haven't broken any laws.
Shawn: Fuck you! I'll be waiting for toi outside! *Walks out of the bar*
Benjamin: Christ, what a cunt.
Lewis: Hey, there's no need to talk like that about him.
Benjamin: Are toi kidding? That bastard just exploded.
Bob: toi pissed him off. He asked toi nicely not to talk about his salary, but toi pushed him. toi pushed it too far.
Shawn: *Walks back into the bar with a Walther P99*
Lewis: Oh shit, Bob.
Bob: Oh no. Shawn?
Shawn: *Points the gun at Benjamin*
Lewis: Shawn, put it down! *Pushes Shawn away from Benjamin*
Benjamin: Come on!! Let him do it!! *Pulls out a Beretta* I'm ready!!!
Bob: *Pulls out his gun* Ben, drop it! Drop the fucking gun!
Benjamin: Not until your friend drops it!!
Shawn: Can I shoot him now?!
Lewis: No.
Benjamin: I heard that!! I fucking heard that!!! Lewis, get out of the way!!
Bob: Ben, don't worry about those two, just drop the gun!
Benjamin: toi stay out of this Bob!!
Bob: *Hits Benjamin* One of toi get some cuffs!
Lewis: *Grabs his pair of hoof cuffs* Here.
Bob: *Takes the cuffs, and puts them on Benjamin* You're under arrest.

This was the most frustrating night for Shawn. He never felt so insulted in his whole life.

The police station

Lewis: *Walking with Bob, and Shawn, as they escort Benjamin to his cell*
Officer 88: What did this guy do?
Bob: He pulled a gun on an officer.
Benjamin: But he started it!
Shawn: Shut up! I didn't start anything!
Benjamin: He pulled the gun on me first!!
Shawn: Get the fuck in your cell!!!! *Pushes Benjamin into a cell* And get some tape to cover his mouth. We're leaving the cuffs on him.
Officer 88: Yes sir.

We were just gonna head back to The Silver Ballroom after bringing Ben in, but something caught our attention. The rear end of a mare so sexy, she could be on a playcolt magazine. She was one of two bureau clerks that worked the night shift, and the other one? Well, we didn't care too much for the other one. This mare had it all.

Mare: Hi boys.
Lewis: You're so hot.
Bob: I think you're gonna make my nose bleed if toi keep looking sexy like that.
Mare: That's what I'm here for.
Lewis: *Laughs* I like this mare.
Shawn: She's got a nice body, and a sense of humor.
Mare: So, who was that poney toi just brought in here?
Shawn: That's the most annoying poney in all of Equestria.
Lewis: His name is Benjamin Guarino.

Every time we tried to leave, that mare would say something to make us stay. Before we knew it, we left at 1:55.

Bob: Oh, that was great.
Shawn: I think I'm gonna fall asleep here. Is that okay?
Lewis: Sure, if toi want to be left behind.
Shawn: No, I'm kidding. I'll make it.

But inside the jail

Benjamin: *Getting his tape, and hoof cuffs removed. He gives $800 to the cop who set him loose*

Lewis, Bob, and Shawn were driving a 1994 Chevrolet Caprice down a road at 2 in the morning. They were all tired, and wanted to go to bed.

Mare: *Talking on the radio* Attention all units, 211 in progress-

Now as toi can tell, we were all tired, and wanted to go straight to bed, but as soon as we got that call, we decided to do our job, then go straight to bed. I still remember this like it was yesterday.

Mare: -Suspect is inside the bank, witnesses believe the suspect's name is Benjamin Guarino.
Bob: No!
Shawn: We just put him in jail.
Bob: Now we're gonna send him to hell!

We were tired, especially Shawn. He didn't want to put up with Guarino anymore.

Outside of the bank.

Lewis: Wait for him. No other cops are around. Lay low, he won't see us.
Benjamin: *Steps out of the bank*
Shawn: *Runs out of the car* BEN!!!
Benjamin: *Running*
Shawn: *Catches him, and slams his head into a mur five times* You're supposed to be in jail!! *Pushes him onto the sidewalk, and grabs a Walther. He shoots seven bullets into Benjamin's head*
Lewis: *Watching Shawn drag Ben back to the car.*
Bob: Alright, glad that's over.
Shawn: *Opens the trunk, and puts Benjamin's body inside* You're telling me. This cocksucker won't be bothering anyone anymore.

At a railway yard

Shawn & Bob: *Digging a hole*
Lewis: *Watching to make sure no one sees them*
Engineer: *Driving a train in the distance, and blows the horn twice*
Shawn & Bob: *Putting Benjamin's body, and the shovels suivant to the car, out of sight*
Engineer: *Blows the horn on his train again, as he passes with a freight train*
Lewis: Alright, he can't see us anymore.
Bob & Shawn: *Continue digging*
Shawn: toi think that's deep enough now?
Bob: Eh, not yet. Three plus digs, and we're good.
Shawn: *Continues digging*
Bob: And, stop.
Shawn: *Rolls Benjamin into the hole* Let's hope this piece of shit doesn't rest in peace. He doesn't deserve it.
Bob: Word. Let's go.
Lewis: *Gets back in his car with the others, and drives away*

Five days later at Vin De Set

Lewis: *With Bob, and Shawn*

When toi go to a place to have dinner, but end up having to go there for a drug bust, it usually puts toi in a foul mood. Today, it wasn't like that. If toi thought the bureau clerk at the police station was hot, toi should have seen all of the mares hanging out at Vin De Set.

Bob: Hey, she's got a nice pair of eyes.
Shawn: They're bright enough to light up The Gateway Arch.

After our drug bust, we got some time to kill, and decided to spend it, on the mares. Or, that's what I thought at least.

Lewis: *Walking towards two hot mares*
Leonard: *Steps in front of Lewis, looking unhappy* We need to talk. *Goes outside with Lewis*
Lewis: Is everything okay?
Leonard: No, I need your help with something. Do toi know a poney named Benjamin Guarino?
Lewis: No. I don't.
Leonard: Shit.
Lewis: What's the matter?
Leonard: He's been reported missing, and nopony seems to know where he went.
Lewis: Did toi ask Shawn, ou Bob?
Leonard: No. Should I?
Lewis: No, I thought toi already asked them. Maybe toi would have gotten plus info.
Leonard: Those two may not know anything, but I think I know some other ponies that'll know. We gotta find him Lewis, and fast.
Lewis: Okay.
Leonard: *Leaves*
Lewis: *Walks back into Vin De Set*

At the train yard, where they buried Benjamin.

Lewis: *Covering his nose as Bob, and Shawn dig closer to Benjamin's body* Ugh, it smells bad! Can toi hurry it up toi two?
Bob: *Joking* No, I don't think so.
Lewis: Don't fuck around Bob! This is serious!!
Bob: Alright alright, take it easy. You're gonna get us arrested if toi keep talking that loud.
Shawn: *Stops digging* I found a hoof.
Bob: I found his head. *Digs plus dirt off of Benjamin* I think we can try to pull him up now. Ready?
Shawn: *Pulls Benjamin up with Bob*
Bob: Okay, good. Where did toi say we were going to put him?
Lewis: In the Mississippi River. And Shawn?
Shawn: Yeah?
Lewis: I'd go for a different brand of weapons for the time being, if I were you.

Six months later

Lewis: *Enters Leonard's office. He sees Leonard, and Bob sitting down in front of him* toi wanted to see me Leonard?
Leonard: Yes. Sit down suivant to Bob.
Lewis: *Sits down* What's this about?
Bob: I don't know.
Leonard: I'll tell toi why you're here. A poney from Detrot a volé, étole fifty million dollars, worth of diamonds. He was trying to get on a plane to take him to Hawaii, but the airport there was closed. He kept on heading west, to try and get on board another plane at another airport, but each one he got to, was either too crowded, ou closed. So he ended up here, killed five of our guys, then got on a plane to Hawaii. We believe he's in Honolulu. *Gives Lewis a picture of the suspect* Go find him, and bring him in here.

It's possible he went into Hawaii to hide, and Leonard didn't want to risk losing this poney to another police department. So he sent me, and Bob into Honolulu to get him.

Bob: *Holding the poney as he stands behind him*
Lewis: *Punches the poney in his chest five times* Where are the diamonds?!
Pony: Here! *Throws a case onto the ground* It's all there!!
Lewis: *Checks, and sees the diamonds* This is all of them.
Bob: Good. *Arresting the pony* You're coming with us.

The poney we arrested was Finn Hackman. Although Finn was a criminal, he had a cousin named Jacob, who was part of the District Attorney, and guess which state he worked in. All Finn needed was a quick phone call, and me, Bob, and Leonard were screwed just like that.

In Court

Judge: Lewis Lee, is it true that toi went out of your jurisdiction to make this arrest?
Lewis: Yes your honor.

Any wrong answer meant that we could be sent to jail, and I did not want that. Neither did Bob, ou Leonard.

Judge: For working out of your jurisdiction, toi two have been suspended from your job for four years. Leonard's suspension will only last two years.

Leonard's suspension was shorter, since he was our commissioner.


During our suspension, we ended up working in The Silver Ballroom. Andy, and I would take turns running the place. Andy ran it during the mornings, and I ran it during the rest of the day. Bob was the cashier, and Leonard made the drinks. He was good, but he sometimes got a lot of complaints of how he made the drinks.

poney 83: Hey, toi put too much ice in here Leonard.
Leonard: Fuck you!! I'm the Commissioner of the St. Foalis Police Department!!
poney 83: So, what the hell are toi doing here?
Leonard: I got suspended. Just enjoy the fucking drink, and don't complain anymore.

I also started making money another way. Prostitution. Any mares that wanted sex would pay me, depending on what we did, and how long we did it. I only had a few hours to do this before my shift in the afternoon, but that's all I needed. I quickly got myself a pile of $10, and $20 dollar bills, right into my pockets. A few of them would also give me something, a little extra.

Lewis: *Sitting in the bed*
Mare 84: That felt great. *Gives Lewis $60, and a small bag of cocaine*

And so that's how I got into the drug business. I didn't need to get high, I just needed the money, so I sold the drugs the mares gave me to earn a few hundred bucks.

Stop the song

Andy: *Watching Lewis outside of the Silver Ballroom*
Lewis: *Kisses a mare as she hands him four $20 dollar bills. He walks into the Silver Ballroom*
Andy: What was that Lewis?
Lewis: What was what?
Andy: That mare just gave toi $80 man. What the hell did toi do to make her give toi all of that money?
Lewis: Well Andy, there are some cases when toi just have to, ask nicely. *Walks to the bar*
Andy: I don't buy it man.
Lewis: Well, that's the truth. Take it ou leave it.
Andy: *Thinks*

2 B Continued