Gretchen Wieners: I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can't help it that I'm popular.


Mr. Duvall: Miss Smith?
Karen Smith: Whoever wrote it probably didn't think anyone would ever see it?
Mr. Duvall: I hope that nobody else ever does see it.

Regina George: 120 calories and 48 calories from fat. What percent is that?
Gretchen Weiners: Um..48 into 120?
Regina George: I'm only eating foods with less than 30% calories of fat.
Cady Heron: It's 40%. Well, 48 over 120 equals x over a 100 and then toi traverser, croix multiply and get the value of x.
Regina George: Whatever. I'm getting cheese fries.

Mr. Duvall: Coach Carr, step away from the underage girls!

Damian: Four for toi Glen Coco, toi GO Glen Coco! ....And none for Gretchen Weiners.Bye
Damian: Four for toi Glen Coco, toi go Glen Coco! And none for Gretchen Weiners. Bye.

Cady Heron: I hate her! I mean, she's really failing me on purpose, just because I didn't rejoindre that stupid Mathletes! She was so queer, she was like, "I'm pusher Cady, I'm a pusher."
Regina George: Hahaha!!! What does that even mean?


Cady Heron: Hey!
Karen Smith: (Shocked, startled and scared) Why are dressed so scary?
Karen Smith: Why are dressed so scary?
Cady Heron: It's Halloween.



Damian: [guarding Cady down the hall] Watch out please! Fresh meat coming through!
Damian: Watch out please! Fresh meat coming through!



Cady Heron: I hated Regina George! I hated her!
Ms. Norbury: Oh, hi. Did toi wanna buy some drugs?


Damian: [driving away] I want my rose chemise back!!! I want my rose chemise back!!!
Damian: I want my rose chemise back! I want my rose chemise back!

Coach Carr: every one grab some rubbers
Coach Carr: Every one grab some rubbers.



Gretchen Weiners: that so fetch!
Gretchen Weiners: That is so fetch!


Coach Carr: Don't have sex. Because toi will get pregnant, and die. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just... don't do it. Promise?
Coach Carr: Alright, everybody grab some rubbers.


Regina George: So you're, like, really pretty.
Cady Heron: Thank you.
Regina George: So toi agree?
Cady Heron: What?
Regina George: toi think you're really pretty?


Karen Smith: toi wanna do something fun? toi wanna go to taco Bell?
Regina George: I can't go to taco Bell! I'm on an all-carb diet! God, Karen, toi are so stupid!

Karen Smith: toi know who's looking fine tonight? Seth Mosakowski.
Gretchen Weiners: toi did not just say that.
Karen Smith: Why? He's a good kisser.
Gretchen Weiners: He is your cousin!
Karen Smith: Yeah, but he's my first cousin.
Gretchen Weiners: Right.
Karen Smith: So toi have your cousins, and toi have your first cousins, and toi have your seconde cousins...
Gretchen Weiners: No, honey. Uh-uh.
Karen Smith: That's not right, is it?
Gretchen Weiners: That is so not right.


Regina George: This is Susan from Planned Parenthood. I have her test results. If toi could have her call me as soon as she can? It's urgent. Thank you!


Gretchen Weiners: Regina, you're wearing sweatpants. It's Monday.
Regina George: So?
Karen Smith: So that's against the rules and toi can't sit with us.
Regina George: Whatever. Those rules aren't real.
Karen Smith: They were real that jour I wore a vest!
Regina George: It was because that vest was disgusting!
Gretchen Weiners: toi CAN'T SIT WITH US!


Regina George: Gretchen, stop trying to make *fetch* happen. It's not going to happen!

Karen Smith: I'm kind of psychic. I have a fifth sense.
Cady Heron: What do toi mean?
Karen Smith: It's like I have ESPN ou something. My breasts can tell when it's gonna rain.

Regina George: Boo, toi whore.

Bethany: Somebody wrote in the book that I'm lying about being a virgin because I use XXL tampons, but It's not my fault I have a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina!

Karen Smith: There's a 30% chance that it's already raining...

Janis Ian: Wow Damian you've truly outgayed yourself.

Cady Heron: In the real world, Halloween is when kids dress up and beg for candy. But in girl world, Halloween is the one time of an a girl can dress like a total slut and no other girl can say anything about it. No one had told me about the girl world rule.

Regina George: *On the phone* Oh this is Suzanne from planned parenthood. Can toi get her to call us back? We have her test results. It's urgent. *Puts phone down* She's not going anywhere!


Gretchen Weiners: Somebody should just stab Ceasar.

Karen Smith: ON WEDNESDAYS WE WEAR PINK!
Karen Smith: On Wednesdays we wear pink!

Karen Smith: Gretchen, I'm sorry I laughed at toi that time toi got diarrhea at Barnes & Noble. And I'm sorry for telling everyone about it. And I'm sorry for repeating it now.

Gretchen Weiners: Oh my God, Karen! toi can't just ask people why they're white!

Damian: Oh, my God! I 'love' this song!
Janis Ian: I 'hate' this song!
Cady Heron: I 'know' this song!


Regina George: Why don't I know you?
Cady Heron: I'm new. I just moved here from Africa.
Regina George: What?
Cady Heron: I used to be home-schooled.
Regina George: Wait... what?
Cady Heron: My mom taught me at home...
Regina George: No, I know what home-school is, I'm not retarded! So you've actually never been to a real school before? Shut up! Shut up!
Cady Heron: I didn't say anything
Cady Heron: I didn't say anything.
Regina George: Wait you're from Africa? But you're, like, really pretty.
Cady Heron: Thank you.
Regina George: So toi agree?
Cady Heron: What?
Regina George: toi think you're really pretty?
Cady Heron: Oh... I don't know
Cady Heron: Oh... I don't know.


Gretchen Weiners: That is so fetch!
Regina George: Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!

Janis Ian: What is that smell?
Cady Heron: Oh, Regina gave me some perfume
Cady Heron: Oh, Regina gave me some perfume.
Janis Ian: toi smell like a baby prostitute
Janis Ian: toi smell like a baby prostitute.
Cady Heron: Thanks
Cady Heron: Thanks.

Regina George: Your bracelet is really pretty where did toi get it? I l’amour it!
Cady Heron: Oh my mom made it.
Gretchen Weiners: So Fetch!
Regina George: What is fetch?
Gretchen Weiners: Oh, it's like slang, from... England.

Cady Heron: Oh, god.
Janis Ian: toi dirty little liar!
Cady Heron: I'm sorry, I can explain.
Janis Ian: Explain how toi forgot to invite us to your party?
Damian: Janis, I cannot stop this car. I have a curfew.
Cady Heron: toi know I couldn't invite you. I had to pretend to be plastic.
Janis Ian: Hey, buddy, you're not pretending anymore. You're plastic. Cold, shiny, hard plastic!
Damian: Curfew, 1:00 AM, it is now 1:10!
Janis Ian: Did toi have an awesome time? Did toi drink awesome shooters, listen to awesome music, and then just sit around and soak up each others awesomeness?
Cady Heron: toi know what? You're the one who made me like this so toi could use me for your 8th grade revenge!
Janis Ian: God! See, at least me and Regina George know we're mean! toi try to act so innocent like, "Oh, I use to live in Africa with all the little birdies, and the little monkeys!"
Janis Ian: God! See, at least me and Regina George know we're mean! toi try to act so innocent like, 'Oh, I use to live in Africa with all the little birdies, and the little monkeys!'
Cady Heron: toi know what! It's not my fault you're like, in l’amour with me, ou something!
Janis Ian: What?!
Damian: Oh, no, she did not!
Janis Ian: See? That's the thing with toi plastics. toi think everybody is in l’amour with toi when actually, everybody HATES you! Like, Aaron Samuels, for example, he broke up with Regina and guess what? He still doesn't want you! So why are toi still messing with Regina, Cady? I'll tell toi why, because toi are a mean girl! You're a bitch! Here. toi can have this. It won a prize!
Damian: And I want my rose chemise back! I want my rose chemise back!


Mr. Duvall: So, uh... how was your summer?
Ms. Norbury: I got divorced.
Mr. Duvall: Oh. My carpal tunnel came back.
Ms. Norbury: I win
Ms. Norbury: I win.

Mr. Duvall: Hell, no. I did *not* leave the South Side for this!

Cady Heron: Wait Regina, I didn't mean for this to happen!
Regina George: To find out that everyone hates me? I don't care!
Cady Heron: Wait Regina, just listen!
Regina George: No! Do toi know what everyone says about toi behind your back? Hmm? They say that you're a homeschooled jungle freak, that's a less hot version of me! Yeah, so don't try to act so innocent! toi can take that fake apology, and shove it right up your hairy c-!
Cady Heron: (Narrating) And that's how Regina died, no I'm totally kidding but she was hurt. Some people say the bus meant to hit her, but that was just a rumor. Other people a dit that 'I' pushed her. That was a even worse rumor.
Cady Heron: [narrating] And that's how Regina died, no I'm totally kidding but she was hurt. Some people say the bus meant to hit her, but that was just a rumor. Other people a dit that 'I' pushed her. That was a even worse rumor.
Betsy Heron: Where's Cady?
Chip Heron: Oh she went out
Chip Heron: Oh she went out.
Betsy Heron: But she's grounded
Betsy Heron: But she's grounded.
Chip Heron: Oh are they not allowed out when they're grounded?






Cady Heron: Hey!
Regina George: Why were toi talking to Janis Ian?
Cady Heron: I don't know, I mean, she's so weird, she just, toi know, came up to me and started talking to me about crack.
Regina George: She's so pathetic. Let me tell toi something about Janis Ian. We were best Friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... Whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend Kyle who was totally gorgeous but then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like, "Why didn't toi call me back?" And I'd be like, "Why are toi so obsessed with me?" So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls pool party, I was like, "Janis, I can't invite you, because I think you're lesbian." I mean I couldn't have a lesbian at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their *bathing suits*. I mean, right? She was a LESBIAN. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack.




Mrs. George: I'm not a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!"
Mrs. George: I'm not a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!

Karen Smith: If you're from Africa, Why are toi white?
Gretchen Weiners: Oh My Gosh, Karen, toi don't just ask people why they're white.

Gretchen Weiners: [in her English class essay, after being humiliated par Regina] Why should Caesar get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about Caesar? Hm? Brutus is just as cute as Caesar. Brutus is just as smart as Caesar. People totally like Brutus just as much as they like Caesar. And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that's not what Rome is about. We should totally just *stab* Caesar!

Janis Ian: toi got your... freshmen, ROTC guys, preps, J.V. jocks, Asian nerds, Cool Asians, Varsity jocks, Unfriendly black hotties, Girls who eat their feelings, Girls who don't eat anything, Desperate wannabes, Burnouts, Sexually active band geeks, the greatest people toi will ever meet and the worst: Beware of plastics.

Janis Ian: toi smell like a baby prostitute.

Gretchen Weiners: So Fetch!
Regina George: What is fetch?
Gretchen Weiners: Oh, it's like slang, from... England.

Cady Heron: And none for Gretchen Weiners. Bye.
Damian: And none for Gretchen Weiners. Bye.

Coach Carr: Don't have sex. Because toi will get pregnant. And die.

Karen Smith: So if you're from Africa, why are toi white?
Regina George: Oh my god Karen! toi can't just ask people why they're white.





Cady Heron: toi know I couldn't invite you! I had to pretend to be Plastic!
Janis Ian: Pfft! Buddy, you're not pretending anymore! You're PLASTIC. Cold, shiny, hard plastic.

Gretchen Weiners: I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me... but I can't help it that I'm so popular.

Regina George: Get in loser, we're going shopping.

Janis Ian: That there is Karen Smith. She is one of the dumbest girls toi will ever meet. Damian sat suivant to her in English last year.
Damian: She asked me how to spell 'orange'.
Cady Heron: *Smirks*.
Janis Ian: That little one, that's Gretchen Weiners.
Damian: She's totally rich because her dad invented grille-pain Strudel.
Janis Ian: Gretchen is in everybody's business. She knows everything about everyone.
Damian: That's why her hair is so big. It's full of secrets.
Janis Ian: And evil takes a human form in Regina George. Don't get me wrong, she may seem like your typical selfish,back-stabbing slut faced ho-bag but in reality, she's so much plus than that.
Damian: She's the Queen Bee, the Star. Those other two are just her little workers.

Karen Smith: (On the phone with Regina) I can't go out tonight *fake coughs*. I'm sick.
Karen Smith: [on the phone with Regina] I can't go out tonight *fake coughs*. I'm sick.
Regina George: Boo toi whore! *hangs up*.

Gretchen Weiners: What are you?
Karen Smith: I'm a souris DuH!..

Janis Ian: Your mom's chest hair!

Karen Smith: Ex-boyfriends are off limits to friends
Karen Smith: Ex-boyfriends are off limits to friends.
Gretchen Wieners: Ex-boyfriends are off limits to friends.

Karen Smith: If you're from Africa... Why are toi white?
Gretchen Weiners: Oh my god, Karen. toi can't just ask people why they're white!

Damian: She doesn't even go here!

Cady Heron: toi know I couldn't invite you, I had to pretend to be plastic!
Janis Ian: Pfft! Buddy, you're not pretending anymore. You're plastic. Cold, shiny hard plastic.

Cady Heron: I know I may seem like a bitch, but that's only because I'm jouer la comédie like a bitch.

Damian: Oh my God, Danny DeVito I l’amour your work!

Regina George: "I want to lose 3 pounds..."
Regina George: I want to lose 3 pounds...

Karen Smith: (in a fake sick voice) i cant go out, im sick *cough* cough*
Karen Smith: [in a fake sick voice] I can't go out, I'm sick. *cough* cough*
Regina George: Boo, toi whore
Regina George: Boo, toi whore.

Karen Smith: My breasts, then can sense when its going to rain
Karen Smith: My breasts, then can sense when its going to rain.
Cady Heron: thats amazing
Cady Heron: That's amazing.
Karen Smith: well, they can sense when its raining
Karen Smith: Well, they can sense when its raining.

Janis Ian: Those bitches!

Gretchen Weiners: toi cant sit here!!!!
Gretchen Weiners: toi can't sit here!

Cady Heron: grool. I meant to say great but then I started to say cool.
Cady Heron: Grool. I meant to say great but then I started to say cool.

Damian: She doesn't even go here!

Gretchen Weiners: I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can't help it that I'm popular.

Coach Carr: Don't have sex. Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up... just don't do it, promise? Take some rubbers.

Janis Ian: That there is Karen Smith. She is one of the dumbest girls toi will ever meet. Damian sat suivant to her in English glass last year.
Damian: She asked me how to spell orange.
Janis Ian: And that little one, that's Gretchen Weiners. She's in everybody's business. She knows everything about everyone.
Damian: That's why her hair is so big. It's full of secrets!

Cady Heron: And on the third jour God created the Remington Bolt Action fusil, carabine so that man could shoot the dinosaurs, and the homosexuals.

Damian: [delivering Candy canes] Taylor Zimmermann, two for you. Glenn Coco? Four for you, Glenn Coco! toi go, Glenn Coco. And uh... "Caddy" Heron. Do we have a "Caddy" héron here?
Damian: [delivering Candy canes] Taylor Zimmermann, two for you. Glenn Coco? Four for you, Glenn Coco! toi go, Glenn Coco. And uh... 'Caddy' Heron. Do we have a 'Caddy' héron here?
Cady Heron: It's Cady.
Damian: Oh Cady, here toi go, one for you. And none for Gretchen Wieners, bye.

Karen Smith: [to Cady] So if you're from Africa, why are toi white?
Gretchen Weiners: Oh my God Karen, toi can't just ask people why they're white.

Gretchen Weiners: Make sure toi check out her mom's boob job. They're hard as rocks! *wink*

Damian: I want my rose chemise back!
Damian: And I want my rose chemise back!

Janis Ian: I don't know why. Its probably because I have a big, fat LESBIAN crush on you. Suck on that! Aye aye aye!
Janis Ian: I guess it's probably because I've got a big *lesbian* crush on you! Suck on *that*!

Damian: Glenn Coco? FOUR for toi Glenn Coco! toi GO Glenn Coco.
Damian: [delivering Candy canes] Taylor Zimmermann, two for you. Glenn Coco? FOUR for you, Glenn Coco! toi go, Glenn Coco.

Regina George: Is beurre a carb?
Cady Heron: ............. YES.
Cady Heron: YES.
Cady Heron: Yes!

Gretchen Weiners: Ohmigawd Karen toi can't just ask people why they're white
Gretchen Weiners: Oh my god Karen, toi can't just ask people why they're white.

Janis Ian: Plastic!

Janis Ian: Your mom's chest hair!

Damian: My nanna takes off her wig when she's drunk..
Damian: My grandma takes her wig off when she's drunk.
Ms. Norbury: Your nanna and I have that in common.
Ms. Norbury: Your grandmother and I have that in common.

Janis Ian: That one there, that's Karen Smith, she is one of the dumbest girls toi will ever meet. Damian sat suivant to her in English last year.
Damian: She asked me how to spell orange.
Janis Ian: That little one, that's Gretchen Wieners.
Damian: She's totally rich because her dad invented grille-pain Streudels.
Janis Ian: Gretchen Wieners know's everybody's knows everybody's business, she knows everything about everyone.
Damian: That's why her hair is so big, it's full of secrets.
Janis Ian: And evil takes a human form in Regina George. Don't be fooled because she may seem like your typical selfish, back-stabbing slut faced ho-bag, but in reality, she's so much plus than that.
Damian: She's the Queen bee - the star, those other two are just her little workers.

Gretchen Weiners: toi can't sit with us!

Regina George: Boo! toi whore.
Regina George: Boo, toi whore!

Gretchen Weiners: I'm sorry that people are so jealous of me... but I can't help it that I'm so popular.

Karen Smith: So if you're from Africa....then why are toi white?
Karen Smith: So if you're from Africa. Then why are toi white?

Regina George: Boo toi Whore
Regina George: Boo, toi whore!

Damian: Glenn Coco? FOUR for you, Glenn Coco! toi go, Glenn Coco!
Damian: Glenn Coco? FOUR for you, Glenn Coco! toi go, Glenn Coco.

Gretchen Weiners: that is so Fetch!
Gretchen Weiners: That is so fetch!

Regina George: get in loser, we're going shopping!
Regina George: Get in loser, we're going shopping.

Regina George: That is the ugliest f-ing jupe I've ever seen.

Bethany: It a dit in that book that I lied about being a virgin because I use super-jumbo tampons, but I can't help it if I've got a heavy flow and a wide-set vagina.

Damian: Danny Devito! I l’amour your work!

Ms. Norbury: Hi! Would toi like to buy some drugs?
Ms. Norbury: Hi! Did toi wanna to buy some drugs?

Gretchen Weiners: toi can't sit with us!

Janis Ian: (when asked what her wig is made of) Your mum's chest hair!

Karen Smith: If you're from Africa.. why are toi white?
Gretchen Weiners: OMG Karen toi can't just ask people why they're white..
Gretchen Weiners: OMG Karen toi can't just ask people why they're white!

Regina George: Boo, toi whore!

Cady Heron: I know it may look like I was being like a bitch, but that's only because I was jouer la comédie like a bitch.

Cady Heron: Regina a dit she'll talk to Aaron. And now she is. How can Janis hate her? She's such a good... SLUT!