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posted by xxxxsammyxxxx
#4.08 Spell

Clark: Hey, Lois. What are toi doing here? Why aren’t toi at school?
Lois: We’re having a surprise party for Chloe’s 18th birthday in your barn, remember?
Clark: No. I remember telling toi toi couldn’t have it here.
Lois: [Handing the box to Clark] Too late now. Everyone’s already been invited, and toi really don’t want it getting back to Chloe that toi rained on her shindig. That would hurt her feelings.
Clark: [Incredulous] What?
Lois: Then I’d have to hurt you.
Clark: Listen, Lois, I don’t want–
Lois: Can toi give me a hand with these? I have to get the wheels back to my dad before he notices them missing.
Clark: Lois, we can’t do this tonight. The guy from Princeton’s coming to meet me. Besides, my parents are out of town.
Lois: Relax, Smallville. It’s just gonna be a couple of people standing around chant Happy Birthday. It’s not gonna be Sodom and Gomorrah. Mr. Ivy League won’t even know we’re here. Trust me.

Clark: The guy from Princeton’s gonna be here any minute. Why are toi so late?
Lois: I took the scenic route. [Looking Clark up and down lustfully] l’amour the view.
Clark: [Uncomfortable] Have toi been drinking?

#4.12 Pariah

Lois: First he married the girl, now he’s dating her?

Lois: So, have they arrested your arm ornament yet?
Clark: [Confused] What?

Lois: [Disbelieving] And did she also happen to be wearing anything low-cut when she spun toi that tale, ‘cause I’m not sure you’re thinking with toi “big” brain here.
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