Title: The De Santa’s
Audience: (Applause)
Jimmy: (Walks in)
Michael: There toi are toi little shit (Holds out marijuana) Looking for this
Jimmy: (Tries to grab it)
Michael: Ah, ah, ah, no
Audience: (Laughs)
Jimmy: Very funny. toi know, you’re a real asshole
Audience: Ooooohhhh
Michael: What did toi just fucking say to me?
Amanda: Stop it toi two, you’re ruining my fucking yoga
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: (Walks in) Somebody say yoga?
Audience: (Cheers)
Michael: Trevor?
Trevor: Michael
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: Good to see toi again
Trevor: Hmm. Yeah, I bet it is. Of course, I’m that the one that’s been resurrected
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: Yeah well… I got in a bit of an awkward situation
Trevor: You’re telling me, bro
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: One of those fake your own death to your best buddy, run off with the dough, and live in a big mansion awkward situation
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: That’s one way of looking at it
Trevor: toi have any other way of looking at it, ‘cause I’m all out
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: It was a long time ago. I’ve been in witness protection. Still am
Trevor: That’s great. That’s great. I’m sorry. Where are my manners? Amanda, it’s good to see you. I missed you. toi used to be fatter
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Nice new tits par the way
Audience: (Laughs hard)
Trevor: Jimmy, toi used to be thinner
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Who are you
Fabien: Namaste, I’m Fabien
Trevor: Ah, good lord… Where’s Tracey?
Michael: … Where’s your sister, Jim?
Jimmy: She’s uh… trying out for TV
Michael: She’s what?
Jimmy: She’s auditioning for Fame ou Shame
Michael: The fuck are toi talking about?
Jimmy: toi know, the talent Slash skill show.
Michael: … What’s her talent?
Jimmy: Dancing
Michael: She’s a horrible dancer
Audience: (Laughs)
Jimmy: She might disagree with toi on that
Michael: … Jésus Christ, what, now? Now? Where
Jimmy: The Maze Bank Arena
Trevor: Our little Tracy being humiliated, let’s go
Michael: We?
Trevor: Yeah, we. What, are toi gonna stand here and argue while your daughter becomes a national laughing stock?
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: You’re worse than I thought, now let’s go
(Transition)
Employee: Sirs, may I please have your names
Trevor: (Grabs his neck) Where the fuck is Tracey Townley! Tracey fucking De Santa (Throws him onto the ground) Screw this
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Where the fuck’s Lazlow!?
Employee: (Points in direction)
(Trevor and Michael walk in)
Lazlow: Alright, it’s the auditions, Fame ou Shame, season fourteen, right here in Vinewood, San Andreas, coming up next, it’s Tracey De Santa (Claps)
Tracey: Hi
Audience: (Applause)
Lazlow: Tracey’s a “dancer”, but she also likes acting, modeling, and working with children. That’s beautiful. That’s original, like a basket full of puppies, ou a rainbow, or… a pile of puke
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: (Points at Michael and Trevor) Who are these clowns
Tracey: That’s my dad and…. Trevor!?
Lazlow: Two dads?
Audience: (Laughs)
Tracey: (Gives Trevor a hug before running back on stage) Okay, I’m back
Lazlow: Okay, three, two, one… Okay, it’s Fame ou Shame for Tracey De Santa! (Steps off stage)
Tracey: (Starts dancing in a very sexual way) (Pulls off her panties from under her skirt)
Michael: (Turns away)
Lazlow: (Steps on stage) Yeah, shake what your daddies gave ya (Dances with Tracey in a very sexual way)
Michael: Alright, that’s enough! (Pushes Lazlow away)
(Security runs in)
Trevor: (Hits security with a chair)
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: (Runs out)
Michael: Come back here, toi little shit (Chases after him with Trevor following)
(Transition)
Trevor: (Chasing after Lazlow in a truck)
Michael: Push him off the fucking road
Trevor: When we crush his little toy car, who knows what will happen (Knocks cars out of the way while chasing him) I hate that closet man whore on the television, I hate him on the radio, I hate him even plus in person. He was never funny
Audience: (Laughs)
(Lazlows car breaks down)
Trevor: (Steps out of the truck)
Lazlow: … Uh… salut guys
Michael: Run out of batteries, huh?
Lazlow: I didn’t mean anything par it, c’mon
Trevor: Yeah, well that little girl sat on my lap when she was two years old and I swore to god that I would rip the fucking skin off of anyone who fucking wronged her
Lazlow: Look, I’m just a dumb A-list celebrity trying to entertain America, okay?
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: I got a lot of things going on, besides toi two trying to kill me. I got multiple sexual harassment lawsuits, plus I’m an addict. and I’ve relapsed. I can’t stop jacking, dude. I jack it in traffic
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: What’s your talent? Besides from l’amour and sex
Lazlow: Have toi seen my show? It’s not live, it’s not funny. That’s my genius. I got no fucking talent.
Michael: Clearly he ain’t being humble, T. toi proved your point
Trevor: This is your daughter. toi should be wanting to rip the fucking ponytail off the back of this guy’s head (To Lazlow) And you! Pants off
Lazlow: (Takes his pants off)
Trevor: (Takes out his phone) Now I want toi to dance sexy, celebrity
Lazlow: I-I need music-
Trevor: Are toi trying to fucking annoy me?!
Lazlow: (Starts dancing)
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Alright, now drop it like it’s hot. I wanna see toi get nice and low. Lower. Lower!
Lazlow: (Falls down)
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: Don’t kill me, please. I’m supposed to be on a magazine cover suivant week
Michael: (Picks him up) Alright, get up. Go, now, before I change my mind
Lazlow: (Runs off)
Trevor: Yeah, I got it all on my camera toi fucking pussy
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: How the fuck did toi do it without me for nine years
Michael: (Leaves)
Audience: (Cheers)
Audience: (Applause)
Jimmy: (Walks in)
Michael: There toi are toi little shit (Holds out marijuana) Looking for this
Jimmy: (Tries to grab it)
Michael: Ah, ah, ah, no
Audience: (Laughs)
Jimmy: Very funny. toi know, you’re a real asshole
Audience: Ooooohhhh
Michael: What did toi just fucking say to me?
Amanda: Stop it toi two, you’re ruining my fucking yoga
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: (Walks in) Somebody say yoga?
Audience: (Cheers)
Michael: Trevor?
Trevor: Michael
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: Good to see toi again
Trevor: Hmm. Yeah, I bet it is. Of course, I’m that the one that’s been resurrected
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: Yeah well… I got in a bit of an awkward situation
Trevor: You’re telling me, bro
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: One of those fake your own death to your best buddy, run off with the dough, and live in a big mansion awkward situation
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: That’s one way of looking at it
Trevor: toi have any other way of looking at it, ‘cause I’m all out
Audience: (Laughs)
Michael: It was a long time ago. I’ve been in witness protection. Still am
Trevor: That’s great. That’s great. I’m sorry. Where are my manners? Amanda, it’s good to see you. I missed you. toi used to be fatter
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Nice new tits par the way
Audience: (Laughs hard)
Trevor: Jimmy, toi used to be thinner
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Who are you
Fabien: Namaste, I’m Fabien
Trevor: Ah, good lord… Where’s Tracey?
Michael: … Where’s your sister, Jim?
Jimmy: She’s uh… trying out for TV
Michael: She’s what?
Jimmy: She’s auditioning for Fame ou Shame
Michael: The fuck are toi talking about?
Jimmy: toi know, the talent Slash skill show.
Michael: … What’s her talent?
Jimmy: Dancing
Michael: She’s a horrible dancer
Audience: (Laughs)
Jimmy: She might disagree with toi on that
Michael: … Jésus Christ, what, now? Now? Where
Jimmy: The Maze Bank Arena
Trevor: Our little Tracy being humiliated, let’s go
Michael: We?
Trevor: Yeah, we. What, are toi gonna stand here and argue while your daughter becomes a national laughing stock?
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: You’re worse than I thought, now let’s go
(Transition)
Employee: Sirs, may I please have your names
Trevor: (Grabs his neck) Where the fuck is Tracey Townley! Tracey fucking De Santa (Throws him onto the ground) Screw this
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Where the fuck’s Lazlow!?
Employee: (Points in direction)
(Trevor and Michael walk in)
Lazlow: Alright, it’s the auditions, Fame ou Shame, season fourteen, right here in Vinewood, San Andreas, coming up next, it’s Tracey De Santa (Claps)
Tracey: Hi
Audience: (Applause)
Lazlow: Tracey’s a “dancer”, but she also likes acting, modeling, and working with children. That’s beautiful. That’s original, like a basket full of puppies, ou a rainbow, or… a pile of puke
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: (Points at Michael and Trevor) Who are these clowns
Tracey: That’s my dad and…. Trevor!?
Lazlow: Two dads?
Audience: (Laughs)
Tracey: (Gives Trevor a hug before running back on stage) Okay, I’m back
Lazlow: Okay, three, two, one… Okay, it’s Fame ou Shame for Tracey De Santa! (Steps off stage)
Tracey: (Starts dancing in a very sexual way) (Pulls off her panties from under her skirt)
Michael: (Turns away)
Lazlow: (Steps on stage) Yeah, shake what your daddies gave ya (Dances with Tracey in a very sexual way)
Michael: Alright, that’s enough! (Pushes Lazlow away)
(Security runs in)
Trevor: (Hits security with a chair)
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: (Runs out)
Michael: Come back here, toi little shit (Chases after him with Trevor following)
(Transition)
Trevor: (Chasing after Lazlow in a truck)
Michael: Push him off the fucking road
Trevor: When we crush his little toy car, who knows what will happen (Knocks cars out of the way while chasing him) I hate that closet man whore on the television, I hate him on the radio, I hate him even plus in person. He was never funny
Audience: (Laughs)
(Lazlows car breaks down)
Trevor: (Steps out of the truck)
Lazlow: … Uh… salut guys
Michael: Run out of batteries, huh?
Lazlow: I didn’t mean anything par it, c’mon
Trevor: Yeah, well that little girl sat on my lap when she was two years old and I swore to god that I would rip the fucking skin off of anyone who fucking wronged her
Lazlow: Look, I’m just a dumb A-list celebrity trying to entertain America, okay?
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: I got a lot of things going on, besides toi two trying to kill me. I got multiple sexual harassment lawsuits, plus I’m an addict. and I’ve relapsed. I can’t stop jacking, dude. I jack it in traffic
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: What’s your talent? Besides from l’amour and sex
Lazlow: Have toi seen my show? It’s not live, it’s not funny. That’s my genius. I got no fucking talent.
Michael: Clearly he ain’t being humble, T. toi proved your point
Trevor: This is your daughter. toi should be wanting to rip the fucking ponytail off the back of this guy’s head (To Lazlow) And you! Pants off
Lazlow: (Takes his pants off)
Trevor: (Takes out his phone) Now I want toi to dance sexy, celebrity
Lazlow: I-I need music-
Trevor: Are toi trying to fucking annoy me?!
Lazlow: (Starts dancing)
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: Alright, now drop it like it’s hot. I wanna see toi get nice and low. Lower. Lower!
Lazlow: (Falls down)
Audience: (Laughs)
Lazlow: Don’t kill me, please. I’m supposed to be on a magazine cover suivant week
Michael: (Picks him up) Alright, get up. Go, now, before I change my mind
Lazlow: (Runs off)
Trevor: Yeah, I got it all on my camera toi fucking pussy
Audience: (Laughs)
Trevor: How the fuck did toi do it without me for nine years
Michael: (Leaves)
Audience: (Cheers)
I was playing the Packie missions of GTA 4.
I made a video of it. And will montrer it when I can.
Anyway, I'm the type of guy who somethings enjoys hearing the sounds of gunfights.
And my tv has HD sound. So it's kinda like surround sound.
Anyway.
I never noticed how HEAVY most GTA 4 gun fights are too listen to.
The 5th is probably the same (haven't played that one for a while now).
Either way.
It's friggin awesome!
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
I made a video of it. And will montrer it when I can.
Anyway, I'm the type of guy who somethings enjoys hearing the sounds of gunfights.
And my tv has HD sound. So it's kinda like surround sound.
Anyway.
I never noticed how HEAVY most GTA 4 gun fights are too listen to.
The 5th is probably the same (haven't played that one for a while now).
Either way.
It's friggin awesome!
____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
As much as I l’amour grand 5.
It isn't very serious.
It's much plus comedic than grand theft auto 4.
In fact.
Grand theft auto 4 is pretty "deep" game.
Niko is a war veteran.
And his whole life he was searching for the man whole betrayed and killed his war unit.
When he finally finds him, toi have the choice of killing him ou letting him live.
Either way.
Niko learns the same lesson.
"revenge salves nothing".
Killing Darko leaves Niko to realize.
It didn't salve anything.
And letting him live, is arguably better.
As Darko is "already dead".
It's hear Niko learns Roman was right all the times he told Niko about learning to forgive.
And if toi choose to finally start forgiving people (by not killing Dimitri) it leads to the death of the very person who wanted toi to do this.
Even if toi kill Dimitri, it again leads to the death of the very person that told toi to do this.
That's pretty deep man! :(
It isn't very serious.
It's much plus comedic than grand theft auto 4.
In fact.
Grand theft auto 4 is pretty "deep" game.
Niko is a war veteran.
And his whole life he was searching for the man whole betrayed and killed his war unit.
When he finally finds him, toi have the choice of killing him ou letting him live.
Either way.
Niko learns the same lesson.
"revenge salves nothing".
Killing Darko leaves Niko to realize.
It didn't salve anything.
And letting him live, is arguably better.
As Darko is "already dead".
It's hear Niko learns Roman was right all the times he told Niko about learning to forgive.
And if toi choose to finally start forgiving people (by not killing Dimitri) it leads to the death of the very person who wanted toi to do this.
Even if toi kill Dimitri, it again leads to the death of the very person that told toi to do this.
That's pretty deep man! :(
I know a dit this about him last time..
But unlike Delacourt who actually believes she's doing the right thing in a lot of ways.
Kruger is a murderer, a torturer, rapist, sadist, just about ANY bad thing toi can imagine.
And after betraying and murdering Delacourt he tries becoming president of Elysium., who knows what would happened.. But I can imagine it involving. the purge being a every jour assurance..
As I a dit before.
His death involves being thrown off an edge and blown par his own grenade...
But unlike Delacourt who actually believes she's doing the right thing in a lot of ways.
Kruger is a murderer, a torturer, rapist, sadist, just about ANY bad thing toi can imagine.
And after betraying and murdering Delacourt he tries becoming president of Elysium., who knows what would happened.. But I can imagine it involving. the purge being a every jour assurance..
As I a dit before.
His death involves being thrown off an edge and blown par his own grenade...
#1: IMRAN ZAKHAEV:
Soap got "lucky".
I mean if Imran can survive his arm getting blown off. Then Soap missing his head and hitting his shoulder would be like a moustique bite to this guy.
Plus, if the player hesitates at all, he DOSEN'T, and your dead before toi even can react..
#2: NIKITA DRAGOVICH:
Nikita is beaten, and both strangled AND drowned at the same time.
That couldn't of been "pain free"..
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Soap got "lucky".
I mean if Imran can survive his arm getting blown off. Then Soap missing his head and hitting his shoulder would be like a moustique bite to this guy.
Plus, if the player hesitates at all, he DOSEN'T, and your dead before toi even can react..
#2: NIKITA DRAGOVICH:
Nikita is beaten, and both strangled AND drowned at the same time.
That couldn't of been "pain free"..
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
#1: SULLIVAN STAPLETON - 300:
He wasn't Gerald Butler, but he was still badass in his OWN way.. To bad nobody but me actually likes this movie..
#2: LIAM NEEISON - TAKEN:
I wouldn't call this UNDERRATED. Everyone loved him in this.. But he still somehow went without winning anything..
#3: SAM ROCKWELL - GREEN MILE:
This guy did an amazing job as a crazy maniac.
In fact, most of us where TERRIFIED of him..
#4: RYAN JOHNSON - GTA 4 & 5:
Patrick "Packie" McReary..
#5: MOTI MARGOLIN - GTA 4:
Dimitri..
He wasn't Gerald Butler, but he was still badass in his OWN way.. To bad nobody but me actually likes this movie..
#2: LIAM NEEISON - TAKEN:
I wouldn't call this UNDERRATED. Everyone loved him in this.. But he still somehow went without winning anything..
#3: SAM ROCKWELL - GREEN MILE:
This guy did an amazing job as a crazy maniac.
In fact, most of us where TERRIFIED of him..
#4: RYAN JOHNSON - GTA 4 & 5:
Patrick "Packie" McReary..
#5: MOTI MARGOLIN - GTA 4:
Dimitri..
#1:
I'm going to take a pillowcase and fill it full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of you!
#2:
toi better not go to sleep, cause as soon as your eyes shut I'm gonna coup de poing toi square in the face.
#3:
I really regret opening my mouth and talking to you.
#4:
If toi don't chew red Big.. Than fuck you!
#5:
toi don't understand. toi don't understand because toi don't understand liberty. toi don't understand freedom. So toi put a crack in my arm like the crack in the Liberty Bell! toi hear me?
#6:
BLUE YOUR MY BOOOOYY!!
#7:
toi tell anyone about this and I'll fucking kill you. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, we'll have him accueil par tonight. Okay, sweetie.
#8:
SOMEBODY HIT SOMEBODY!!
#9:
If toi have a small child, use it as a shield!
#10:
YES!! EVERYONE CAN EAT SHIT! A BIG BAG OF SHIT!.. I AM THE GREATEST MAN! IN THE WORLD!!
I'm going to take a pillowcase and fill it full of bars of soap and beat the shit out of you!
#2:
toi better not go to sleep, cause as soon as your eyes shut I'm gonna coup de poing toi square in the face.
#3:
I really regret opening my mouth and talking to you.
#4:
If toi don't chew red Big.. Than fuck you!
#5:
toi don't understand. toi don't understand because toi don't understand liberty. toi don't understand freedom. So toi put a crack in my arm like the crack in the Liberty Bell! toi hear me?
#6:
BLUE YOUR MY BOOOOYY!!
#7:
toi tell anyone about this and I'll fucking kill you. I'm kidding, I'm kidding, we'll have him accueil par tonight. Okay, sweetie.
#8:
SOMEBODY HIT SOMEBODY!!
#9:
If toi have a small child, use it as a shield!
#10:
YES!! EVERYONE CAN EAT SHIT! A BIG BAG OF SHIT!.. I AM THE GREATEST MAN! IN THE WORLD!!